Betrothal
by ElsaInBlue
Summary: Hans and Elsa are betrothed from the day of her birth until the secret of her powers is discovered. The events of the film take place, and Hans returns to Arendelle as a changed man three years later. But will Elsa give him the second chance he longs for, or use it to seek her revenge? Canon divergent, Helsa. Covers pre, post, and the canon events of Frozen.
1. Birth of a Promise

It began before they were children. The youngest of thirteen princes wasn't destined for much in life until the birth of a beautiful baby girl in line to become the future queen of a nearby land. Hans had only been two-years-old at the time, but the kingdoms of Arendelle and the Southern Isles had been looking for a way to strengthen their bond as allies, and a betrothal was decided. Princess Elsa, then just a tiny infant, pure and as white as the fallen snow, would marry Prince Hans after her twenty-second birthday, uniting their kingdoms in matrimony.

The news spread far and wide, the people rejoicing at their sovereign's prosperous decision, and suddenly the lonely prince was destined for a life of greatness. As the eldest in a monarchy that held its women in the highest regard, Elsa would one day become the Queen of Arendelle with Hans by her side as King Consort. Becoming ever so much more than the forgotten child in a castle full of high achieving males.

As the years went on, Elsa grew into a beautiful young girl, welcoming a baby sister just a few years later. Princess Anna's arrival assured that Arendelle would be under the nobility of a women, should anything happen to King Agdar.

Elsa thrived in her studies, excelling in math and languages. In the Southern Isles, Hans was severely torment by jealous older brothers who would never reach a throne of their own. The promise of a life as king kept his chin held valiantly high, always glancing at the portrait of the radiant blonde hanging in his room, commissioned especially for him. He stared at it constantly. A smiling girl not much younger than he, dressed in a matching blue jacket and dress, lined with traditional rosemaling. She looked like an angel to him. So much more than just a promising future and a chance to be something greater than he already was. If he was going to be forced to marry anyone, he thanked the heavens it was to Elsa.

More time passed and King Agdar agreed that his future queen to be, still just shy of eight-years-old, should be presented to the neighboring kingdoms. Nothing extravagant, but a chance for Elsa to display her natural charm and grace to her fellow monarchs. An opportunity for Arendelle to show off their young princess and better acquaint her with the vast world she would one day inherit.

Sons and daughters of nobility were invited to enter through the grand gates of Arendelle castle, many of whom were around Elsa's age, and that made her even more eager to meet them. But of all the names on the guest list, the one she was most looking forward to meeting more than any other, was none other than her future husband and King, Prince Hans of the Southern Isles.

She was well aware of her betrothal to him, but at such a young age, she could only comprehend the arrangement to a certain extent. Agdar always presented it to her in a business-like fashion, duty to kingdom above all else, but Elsa's mother would tell her stories of the love she would one day cherish. She'd tell her how even though she would be Queen, Hans would always be by her side to protect her and be entirely devoted to her. They would make great memories together and one day, have a family of their own.

Finally, the day of Elsa's unveiling to the world had come. The fjords had melted and passable waterways welcomed the nearby kingdoms into Arendelle's busy port. The King's royal standard greeted guests as they traveled down the long walkway to the massive castle, surrounded by towering picturesque mountains the seemed to rise straight out of the fjord and clear to the heavens themselves.

All attendees were gathered in the great hall for formal introductions, lead by the King and Queen, with Elsa following close behind. A steadfast line of princes, princesses, lords, and ladies bisected the ballroom as they patiently waited for a chance to meet the tiny royal.

One by one, Elsa made her way down the line, being formally introduced by Kia to each guest. Three quarters of the way through, her eyes drifted away from the young princess in front of her, to the familiar redheaded prince waiting nervously at the end. It was _him_. Just the way she'd pictured he'd be. A miniature version of a king in his white outfit and tall black boots, he stood with his back perfectly aligned as he reminded himself to breathe. Knowing this was a day he thought wouldn't come for another fifteen years, and was about to unfold before his very eyes.

For the first time ever, Elsa felt nervous. Her hands that were normally chilled to the bone from her icy powers, began to feel hot and clammy as she resisted wiping them on her thick wool dress. Her mind refused to stay focused on the next few guests as she inched closer to the dashing Prince Hans. Not even introduced yet and the two young monarchs could not take their eyes off of each other, entranced by the innocence of fascination and curiosity; knowing their fate had been written since her birth. Of anyone else in the room, Hans was the only one who would come to know Elsa as his bride and Queen.

Her shiny black shoes, so beautifully decorated with a hint of rosemaling, positioned themselves before the auburn haired prince and he immediately lowered himself into the most regal bow. It had been ingrained in him to worship his princess for the past seven years, for she was his to protect. To covet. And the need and desire to do so was already second nature to him.

"May I present, Prince Hans of the Southern Isles," Kai exclaimed, the King and Queen of Arendelle excitedly looked on with delight. Hands held firmly together as they prayed for the best outcome of this first and most crucial meeting.

"I know who you are," the Princess said, the depth of her confidence causing Hans to freeze in his stance. Her voice was as soft and achingly sweet. And she was more angelic in person than her portrait ever ha r her credit for. Platinum blonde hair effortlessly braided back, adorned with a simple yet brilliant crown. At just nine-years-old, Hans found himself awestruck by Elsa's incomparable beauty. And then she smiled, cheeks blushing with a burst of color and her eyes twinkled like shimmering stars in the clear night sky. She was positively enchanting, and she was to be his. As the youngest of thirteen boys, Hans never had much to call his own, until Elsa.

Elsa's dutiful eyes studied her Prince, dressed in an all white uniform and epaulettes, making quite the impression on her as her heart fluttered with excitement. He was the handsomest boy in the entire room, and she found herself lucky to have been paired with such a fine young Prince. Their eyes finally met, sparkling blue against deep hunter green, and Elsa couldn't stop blushing at the way he shined in her presence. He loved her ever so much more in these precious first few moments together that ever before.

A small party followed the formal introductions, food and laughter filling the room to the rafters as a small traditional band played softly in the background. All sought the attention of the wise beyond her years princess but she only had her heart set on Hans.

She found him at the far end of the room by himself, admiring the craftsmanship of the hall's towering pillars, with not much else for a child to do. A smile and a nod of her head towards the grand staircase was all it took to convince Hans to follow Elsa out to the gardens on the side of the castle. Elsa may have been a princess, and filled that role to its fullest, but she also likes to have fun and decided she'd had her fill of formally for the evening. A precocious young sister helped keep her grounded and instilled a sense of unbridled joviality in her. Once outside in the warm summer night air, she showed Hans the various flowers of the gardens, all indigenous to Arendelle, as she plucked a few for him to savor their sweet smell; none of which compared to the fair haired girl.

Pleasant conversation turned into fun and games and the two broke from their regal roles and childishly chased each other through the trees and flowerbeds, giggling and scampering about as Hans tried to catch Elsa. She was fast but he would never stop pursuing her, for he longed to be the object of her affection more than anything else in life.

Unable to find her footing along a steep slope, Elsa stumbled miserably but was caught in the nick of time by quick thinking Hans. She giggled in his arms as he tickled her before bringing upright under the canopy of a weeping willow.

"I'm sad that I have to leave tomorrow. I want to stay here forever with you." Hans sighed longingly as he continued to hold Elsa in his arms.

"Someday you will. I'm told we're to be married. Then we'll see each other every day." The most radiant smile stretched across her face, causing Hans' to widen in time. _Was it possible to be so smitten at such a young age_ , he wondered?

In the light of a rising moon, Hans gazed down on Elsa's glowing face and let fate guide him, placing a chaste kiss upon her tender lips. Only seven-years-old and Elsa had her first kiss in the gardens of the castle. The blush colored a deep crimson as she batted her lashes and enjoyed their last few minutes together before the party ended.

Just before Hans boarded the ship back to his kingdom, they promised each other that they'd write as often as they could. At first the idea of a long distance correspondence seemed fun for Elsa, but her world was about to take a chilling turn and Hans would unknowingly become one of her few lifelines to the outside world.

A late night snowman building escapade with Anna in the great hall changed everything when Elsa accidentally struck Anna with her powers, freezing her head. Their parents rushed to the trolls and managed to save Anna, but it was decided that Elsa's powers had reach their breaking point and she had to be kept away from everyone, including her sister.

The castle was shrouded in depressing shadows. Doors, windows, and the once welcoming front gates, were shut with no promise of ever opening again. Elsa was forced to retreat to a new room where she remained most of the time, hardly ever seeing her precious little sister any more.

Crushed by the severing of ties with Anna, Elsa turned to her desk to write letter after letter to the boy in the Southern Isles. She kept the information about her powers hidden, but expressed the loneliness she felt after being exiled to her room and cut off the life she once knew.

The fear and darkness that had taken over Elsa's life was briefly lightened when she received a letter back from Hans. In it, he poured his heart out to her about how lonely and teased he was by his older brothers, three of which had pretended he was invisible for over a year. He reminded her to be strong, that he was there for her and would anxiously await a reply. Hans never knew but she read his letters before bed so many times, holding on to every last one of his words.

Time carried on and even though Elsa's powers grew stronger and more uncontrollable, something remarkable was developing between the young prince and his princess. Through their letters, they learned so much more about each other, probably more than anyone else in their lives knew about them. The distance between them was great but the ties that bound them together were stronger than steel thread. With time, great friends became two teenagers who believed they were each other's soul mates, meant to be and separated only by time and space.

By the age of eighteen, Elsa and Hans were madly in love with each other. Occasional portraits came their way and Elsa lost herself in the Prince's Kelly green eyes, so full of kindness and warmth with the same glint of sorrow flickering just beyond. The tough times only brought them closer together. What Elsa couldn't tell Anna, she confided in Hans, cementing their devotion to one another in each and every letter they diligently penned.

In four short years, Elsa would be married to Hans and she didn't expect to see him in the mean time, given the constraints King Agdar put on her at home. Until one day when he announced that Elsa should make a brief appearance at an upcoming event her father was hosting, a gathering of his closest allies. Kings, princes, dukes, and ladies would again grace the great hall with their presence, but under more secretive terms this time. Rumors of Elsa's lack of public appearances began to swirl throughout the land and Adgar thought this would help solidify the stability of his kingdom and his daughter's well being.

At first, Elsa vehemently objected. The pressure to keep her powers concealed was far too great and she was much too terrified to appear at such an event. But her father assured her that her presence would be extremely brief at best. And he believed in her. He believed she would one day reach the point where her powers wouldn't control her and she could show the world her beauty and strength. Still unconvinced, Agdar passingly mention to Elsa that Prince Hans would be amongst those invited and she simply couldn't resist once he told her that. A quick appearance sanctioned by her father, where she could keep her gloves on and not have to touch anyone or anything, seemed manageable at the prospects of seeing her betrothed. Only she didn't think of him that way. To her, he was her other half. The one who understood her completely; heart, mind, and soul.

* * *

 _Putting this up to see the response. Hope you enjoyed it. Future chapters will be beta'ed, but she's a little busy at the moment :)_


	2. End of an Era

For the first time in several long years, the King of Arendelle welcomed a small and select group of royals to come and meet the mysterious Princess Elsa. The gates opened once more, but only in secret to those who were privileged enough to be invited. Even Anna was kept away from the gathering and distracted by her tutors in a secluded room off the west end of the castle. She was not made aware of the betrothal for fear it would make her feel left out, more so than she already did. It also made it less difficult for her father to explain rare appearances, like this one, where Elsa would get to see Hans, when she hardly ever got to see her sister herself. King Agdar was a great leader but when it came to parenting, he didn't always make the wisest decisions, despite his heart being in the right place.

Agdar presented the whole event as a chance to assemble without other kingdoms and duchies knowing or growing suspicious, at least that's what he told the attendees. It evaded questions surrounding the drawn curtains and obvious lack of staff, furtive shadows of another secret no one was ever to know about his beloved daughter.

The ballroom was ablaze with dozens of candles as evening crept across the fjord. Differing from past events, a much shorter line of nobility waited to greet the young and blossoming Princess Elsa. Those who had the privilege of meeting her before immediately noticed her drastic change in demeanor. She was frightfully demure and shy, never touching a single person and choosing to politely curtsy instead. Her father had reminded her that she could wear her gloves, a special white leather pair he had made just for her, and assured her that she wouldn't have to lay a finger on a single object. With her hands firmly clasped in front of her regal frame, she allowed herself the simple luxury of smiling to her guests. As the line grew shorter, her smile lengthened and brightened like a midday burst of sunshine. Amplified by the promise of the one hope in her life that shined brighter than Polaris itself.

As if repeating history, the dashing redheaded prince, now a grown and towering twenty-year-old man, awaited her company at the end of the receiving line. After years of frowning and wearing a mask of sorrow, the warmest smile breached Elsa's face as her eyes settled on the handsome Prince Hans. _Her_ Hans. And something began to happen to her that she'd never experienced before. A rush of adrenaline surged through her body like the a rupture of a damn. Her heart beat double-time, nearly bursting out of her chest as he smiled back at her with that familiar and long awaited twinkle in his eyes. If she could remember one moment for the rest of her life, it would be those eyes. How they danced with excitement each time they settled upon her.

"Princess Elsa," he began, voice smooth and deep. "I've waited eleven long years to savor the splendor of your company again," Hans said gallantly, his words rolling over her like waves crashing onto shore.

"I thought I would have to wait four more. But it looks as though fate can be kind sometimes." Elsa breathed a heavy sigh, relieving the pressure that had been bearing down on her since she'd entered the room. "I've missed you so much," she whispered before she could think, bringing a grin to her father's face.

Hans knowingly glanced and smiled cordially at the King before shifting his eyes back to Elsa. "Might we be able to go somewhere more private?" Wanting to escape the room full of strangers, Elsa turned to her father who gave her permission with a simple nod and another pleasant smile. He was so overjoyed to see her happy for once. Even if she skipped the rest of the event, it was worth everything for his eldest daughter to experience the thrill of young love for just one night.

It saddened Elsa that she wasn't familiar enough with her own castle to find a place suitable for the two of them to talk, so she brought Hans to the only place she frequented more than her own room, the library. The room was large but held an intimacy about it, perhaps due to the constantly drawn curtains Hans noticed was apparent in every room of the castle. Even shrouded in darkness, the space was warm with its rich ruby textiles and splash of color provided by the vase of crocuses near the sitting area.

Elsa stood nervously against a lengthy table looked down upon by a massive portrait of her father during his coronation. On second thought, a room without the constant eyes of her father, even if they were only a painting, might have been more comfortable. Hans perused the contents of the room, scanning historic books and admiring the craftsmanship of a collection of fiddles on the wall. Eventually he rounded the edge of a side table with a chess set and his eyes perked at the opportunity he'd been searching for.

"Care to play?" That mellifluous voice gripping her from halfway across the room.

"Certainly." Elsa had played chess nearly her entire life and a quick shuffle of her pieces was never enough to trigger her powers. And ever since she'd entered the library with Hans, her anxiety had retreated, replaced by a peculiar warmth that licked her skin like the roar of a toasty fire.

"White or black?" Hans asked as he made himself comfortable on the chaise longue. He had to reach over the back of the chair to play their game but it allowed for a more casual sitting arrangement. With the board to their side, it left nothing in between them except a wide-open opportunity to let their love unfurl face-to-face.

"White," they chimed in unison.

Elsa colored and giggled at their jinx. "Always," she bubbled and let the beautiful laugh Hans had only heard her gift him with as a child, float out from her throat. Now, as a young woman, it was delicate and achingly feminine. He swore his heart might have stopped when she went so far as to hide her joyful smile behind a gloved hand. _Impossibly adorable, she is._

"I suddenly remembered that was your favorite color for chess." Hans rose from the chaise longue and switched to the other side so that Elsa could be next to her color of choice.

The game started off easy enough. Hans insisted Elsa take the first turn, and she did so without hesitation, heart skipping with glee from actual human contact. Batting lashes flirtatiously swept over the pieces and straight across the board to where peridot eyes waited to meet her every alluring gaze.

"Have you ever noticed in the game of chess, that it's based on a royal court? But there are no princes or princesses? There's a king and a queen and those that surround them. As if we've been forgotten," Hans chuckled. "But when the king falls and the game is over, who is it that takes his place? Not the consort." An intriguingly deep thought.

"Are you reading a future chapter from my life, Prince Hans?"

"Formality is your strong suit, but not necessary with me. Please, call me Hans."

A deep breath laced with sadness escaped Elsa and joined the shadows of the room. It was eerie how easy it was for her to open up to him, but this was a topic they'd discussed to great lengths in their letters. "I do feel forgotten. I'm not a part of my family, in the traditional sense. Everyone knows my name. Who I am to become. Few know my face. And know even less about me. Including my own sister." Despite her heavy admission, Elsa kept her fingers busy and the game carried on, eyes only leaving her king to quickly look up at her prince.

"How few?"

"I would say, just one." Abandoning her king, Elsa let her piercing blue eyes latch themselves back onto Hans. "And I'm looking at him." Hans froze in his seat, mesmerized by the seriousness in Elsa's voice and radiant features. "Check mate."

"That's impossible. We just started."

"I warned you," hint of sass under her mirthful tone. " I'm very good."

"Indeed."

Filled to the brim with small talk, Hans left his place on the chaise longue and dared to pull back the curtains at the sitting nook, quickly joined by Elsa, who found herself unable to leave his side.

"You have a beautiful view of the garden. In fact, I believe I recognize one of my favorite spots in all of Arendelle," tapping his finger against the glass.

"And where would that be?" She knew exactly where he was pointing to but played along.

"Right there. Beneath that tree. Do you remember what happened there?" Hans slowly turned his head and waited for Elsa to recall.

He could tell the moment it entered her mind, for she met his gaze and found herself extremely close to his lips; warm breath lofting between them. "You kissed me. For the first time."

Her heart raced like a wild stallion as Hans brazened his efforts, inching himself towards her.

"I gather no one else has had the pleasure of gracing your lips."

"No one has had the pleasure, of my lips... or far less than that. I don't experience a lot of physical contact with anyone."

"You said that," he lamented. "My heart aches every time I read it in your letters. I wonder why anyone in their right mind would not want to comfort you. But sadly, I find myself in a similar position, and don't even have an answer for myself."

As melancholic as Hans felt about Elsa's situation, she couldn't bare to fathom the horrendous treatment Hans endured back in the Southern Isles. "They're terrible to you. You don't deserve that."

"Neither do you." A long beat passed, and both could feel something brewing between them. "Elsa, I have to get this off my chest and say it in person." Her eyes widened in anticipation, breath coming to a silent halt. "I've only seen you twice in my whole life, but I feel closer to you than anyone else. You know me. The _real_ me. And I feel as though you've allowed me the same privilege to know you in return. I've professed my love for you hundreds of times in hundreds of letters but never once having done so in the flesh." A warm blush bloomed across Elsa's lightly freckled cheeks as Hans started to slowly undo her. "Would I be wrong in saying our feelings are mutual?" Now sitting so close that they were almost touching, dark blue dress softly draped across her thin frame as a fire crackled in the background.

"You wouldn't be wrong. But specifically, how _do_ you feel about me? Now that you're here." Her heart was pounding so loudly she could barely hear herself think, lost in dozens of tiny russet freckles that trailed across Hans' refined cheekbones. He was _devastatingly_ handsome, looking ever so much more like a man than the boy she had remembered. He was refined and dignified. And although he tried to hide it, she could feel the love they'd cultivated radiating through his stoic veneer.

"Elsa," he whispered softly, whirling her into a hedonic state. So much so that she didn't register what he was doing with his hands until they came to cup the sides of her face, tilting her head up to meet the passion stewing in his eyes. "I love you."

Her lips parted in surprise. She'd known he'd felt that way. He'd abandoned signing his letters with the much too impersonal "best regards" and began to use the more endearing "love always" years ago. But to hear it in the flesh sent bolts of electricity racing up her spine. The spell of love was so consuming that the yelling in the back of her head about her powers couldn't be heard over the shallowness of her own breath and rapidly canting heartbeat.

Gentle thumbs caressing her cheeks pulled her from her bevy of thoughts. "What are you doing?" She asked, eyes half lidded as she basked in his affection. _Why aren't you freezing,_ wasn't a question she could ask in the moment but it was exactly what she was thinking. She hadn't touched a person in almost a decade. Not her mother, father, or sweet little sister. How on Earth was this man now cradling her face without becoming encased in ice? What power did he have to control her?

"I'm admiring you. I'm desperately in love with this face. How funny it is that royal law binds us to each other, and that I wouldn't have it any other way? I wouldn't want to spend the rest of my life with someone any more than I do you." A silence loomed over them and Hans began to grow concerned, unaware of the confusion clouding Elsa's mind. "Elsa, I have to know. How do you feel about me?"

He waited patiently, nervously. Elsa was still young and so inexperienced with social contact. Letters were one thing but Hans' good looks and chivalrous ways were causing her to nearly swoon. The softness of his touch upon her face awakened a part of herself she'd never felt before. A yearning, for him. For something, she didn't really know. Finally, she opened her eyes, having closed from his soothing strokes against her cheeks, and looked deep within his own.

"I love you. Very much. You're the only one who knows what I'm going through. The only one who has ever said such kind things to me. Words that have kept me strong. Kept me going. When I don't think I can go on. And I can't explain it, but there is this indescribable force that pulls me to you. Just as you said. Like it was meant to be. _We_ were meant to be."

Hans was ever so relieved to know the love that ran deep through his being was requited in the highest degree by the woman he loved so furiously. Empowered by her words, he gently guided Elsa's face to his, her eyes fluttering shut, and placed the most tender kiss upon her rose pink lips. For someone who hadn't experienced touch for so dreadfully long, the pull of Hans' velvety smooth lips on hers was by far and away the single greatest feeling ever. For whatever reason, her powers weren't threatening their happy moment and she let fear fall to the wayside for just a moment as Hans kissed her again, more firmly this time, as his lips wantonly hugged against hers. Thirsting for a deeper taste of his future bride and the love of his life.

Innocent exchanges of affection gave way to rousing passion, more explorative and daring, as Hans slipped his hand under Elsa's well-tailored jacket and rested it against her slender waist. She quietly gasped, sucking the air from out of the void between them. Still, no ice. Hans proceeded and pulled her close, bodies pressed gorgeously together as their love flew off the pages and became reality. Every line of devotion was now pouring from their lips and seeping out from every gentle caress.

Intrepid hands memorized the curvature of her spine and smooth plane of her stomach, nimble fingers roved over the golden hand-stitched crocuses in the front of her delicate dress.

She didn't dare touch him, but soaked up every second he ardently cosseted her, making her feel utterly doted upon that Hans eventually tasted salt in their kiss before he pulled away.

"No need for tears, my love," he whispered and wiped away the remnants of the streak that had appeared on her cheek. He knew she was thinking about how this would all have to end. How she would have to return to her life of solitude. "You're not alone as long as I'm here. And when we're married, you'll never be lonely again. I'll wake up with you and fall asleep beside you. And every moment in between, I'll devote to your happiness. Not only because it's my duty but because I love you that much. I promise, Elsa."

Their lips met again but it only provoked more tears. "I don't want you to leave. How can I make it another four years?"

Hans worked a soothing hand up and down Elsa's back. "We've waited this long. Maybe you can come to the Southern Isles and I can show you my home. Before I leave it all behind," he chuckled, practically giddy at the thought of one day being free from the dreaded isles.

"I've never thought of it like that. You're leaving everything you've ever known for me."

"But I don't see it that way," he corrected. "I'm leaving an unfulfilling life for one of happiness and love. Something I don't get at home. And Arendelle is beyond beautiful. The people are lovely. Most of all, I have my beautiful princess waiting for me. So that I can bring her joy and end her pain."

"I don't know if it will ever end." Elsa's face fell back into its normally miserably state as she left his hold and distanced herself, fragile hands wringing themselves into a frenzy. "There are things you don't know. Things... I can't even begin to tell you."

"And I don't have to know." He followed her and immediately took her back into his arms. "Are you lonely and in pain right now?"

"No. Quite the opposite."

"Then see? Together, there are brighter days ahead."

"I want so much more," Elsa groaned childishly, surprising even herself. "I never knew how impatient I was, until now. I'm already missing the feeling of your arms around me, your voice. How it calms me so instantly."

He hummed a laugh and squeezed her tighter, enjoying the color of Elsa's cheeks flame from his embrace. "I'm inpatient as well. You don't make it easy to restrain myself," kissing her softly. "Makes me look forward to our wedding night when we can truly be one. I'll make love to you and it will be that start of a new and more exciting chapter in both of our lives. We'll stop writing letters and save them for our children to read one day. The story of our love. Till then, I'll dream of you every night. Waiting for me in a magnificent white gown."

Four more years. Four long years until Elsa got to walk into the chapel and officially have Hans by her side for the rest of his life. He would eventually become one of the few to know about her powers. There was no way to be married and for him to not know. But she knew he would accept her. Possibly even help her. Because he had been holding her for what felt like forever and she hadn't seen the slightest bit of frost. They were not brought together by choice, but she began to believe he was part of solution to controlling her powers. How perfect their union would be. True love and happy ending to a tumultuous childhood. They were each other's hope, in every sense of the word.

"Elsa, dear," the King called from the other side of the door. "The gentlemen are gathering in the council chambers and Hans' father is requesting his presence."

The two young monarchs sighed in frustration. "He'll be right there, Papa."

"Duty calls I'm afraid." Hans tried to force a smile but failed to fool Elsa. It wasn't easy for either of them to part. "Although, I have a feeling that is something you'll be saying more to me in the future. When you are queen." This time a genuine smile flourished across his lips.

She wanted to touch him so badly but settled for the security of Hans' embrace.

"Kiss me again. One last time," Elsa begged and lifted herself onto the balls of her feet, bringing her lips to his as they melded into perfection.

Sadly, the kiss came to end and Hans reluctantly straightened his jacket and magenta cravat; an accessory Elsa felt suited him wonderfully, now that he was a full fledge gentleman. "I love you. I'll write you as soon as I return," Hans vowed. "And every day, if I have to. If it means your happiness." His hand reached the gold plated knob of the door as Elsa obediently stayed put.

"I love you too," lips rising into a beguiling smile. "The next time I see will be for our wedding."

"Tell me all the plans. Every last one." The door opened and Hans stepped into the hallway, face drawing longer with each step.

"I will. Every last one."

* * *

Later that evening Elsa tried to understand how her powers had remained under control with Hans. For eight long years she hadn't hugged her parents or her sister, and she was determined to figure it out. With most of the household asleep and her father entertaining a few nobility in the council chambers, Elsa roamed the halls on her way back from dinner and removed the white leather gloves from her hands, laying them on a side table in one of the lesser frequented hallways. To her dismay, a sheet of ice travel the length of the table faster than lightning, freezing a vase of flowers and shattering it to pieces along with any remaining hope Elsa had left. How could she touch him and nothing else, not even an inanimate object, without losing control of her powers? Furious at the continued torment her powers inflicted upon her, Elsa stomped her foot in anger, causing further damage as the carpet glazed with a frost that crept up the walls in jagged streaks. Outraged at her temper tantrum, Elsa retreated to her room to suffer alone.

Unbeknownst to her, Hans' father, the King of the Southern Isles, had witnessed the entire event. He'd only excused himself to the washroom and became lost in the endless maze of hallways, stumbling upon Elsa and her frightening display of ungodly magic.

While Elsa wept alone in her room, the King stood motionless just around the corner, hands covering his mouth as he tried to gain reason to the events he'd just witnessed.

He spoke of nothing to anyone, not even Hans, until they had boarded the ship to return home the next morning. Hans had already said his goodbyes to Elsa the one and only time he got to see her, and was devastated about having to leave. The King called Hans to the captain's quarters just after setting sail. With a heavy heart, he informed his youngest son that the engagement had been called off. Shock and horror marred Hans' face and he begged his father for an explanation. The only thing the King would offer was that it was for a good reason, for no one belonged with that girl.

King Agdar had been unexpectedly informed of the decision to revoke the betrothal the night before and didn't argue with the King of the Southern Isles once he saw that look of alarm glinting in his eyes. He was kind enough not to discuss what he had witnessed and Agdar didn't need him to utter a single word, it was written all over the King's horrified face.

Saddened beyond belief, Agdar had the poignant task of delivering the news to his daughter. She had so little joy in her life and this marriage, Hans to be more exact, was the only thing he knew that had brought a renewed sense of happiness into her world. When he told her, he left out the part about why. He didn't want Elsa blaming herself or her powers further for the extinction of another relationship. He feared she couldn't handle anymore than she'd already been dealt.

Devastated, Elsa stayed in her room for days, surrounded by fractals of ice climbing like ivy and creeping out from underneath her shadow. She was heartbroken beyond belief. The loss burned, feeling like torture as the promises of the future were ripped away. And what made it worse was there was no explanation offered. She agonized over their correspondence for days, analyzing and scrutinizing their last encounter in the library; presuming it had all gone well but must have been sorely mistaken.

Unable to come up with a plausible reason, Elsa decided to end her pain and flush her thoughts out in a final letter to Hans. In it, she wrote that she would eradicate every last memory she had of him, along with every letter that had been written over the past eleven years. She wept for the love that had been lost, staining the pages as the quill scratched furious along; hurrying to gain the closure she sought. Addressed and sealed with the royal crocus symbol of Arendelle, Elsa gave the letter to Kai and banned herself from ever thinking about Hans again.

* * *

Life pressed on and Elsa was in lower spirits than she'd ever been before. No matter how bad her powers got, her father always assured her that everything would be alright. He truly believed that she would one day be able to control her emotions and her powers along with it. He tried to cheer her up but it was no use. Her weight suffered to the point that the queen grew concerned for her health, while Agdar did his best to keep Elsa focused on her royal duties.

A voyage had been on the schedule for quite some time and although Agdar considered canceling it, he thought it would be a great opportunity for Elsa to see how she did on her own. A chance to prove to herself just how well she could do without his help.

Booming with confidence in his growing princess, Agdar smiled proudly at Elsa as she curtsied for him and her mother. Fear swirled within her brilliant cerulean eyes as she asked them one last time if they had to go. Having nothing but the utmost faith in her, he again assured her that she would be fine.

The ship never made it to its destination. Swallowed but a rogue wave in a treacherous storm, Elsa's parents perished in the vast ocean.

Elsa could hear her sister's crying from outside her door just after the funeral, knowing she needed her more than anything but refused to open the door. Anna knew that Elsa was crushed by the death of their parents, but she had absolutely no idea their passing had come on the heels of losing the love of her life. Confined to grieve within the walls of her room, Elsa's powers surged beyond anything they'd ever amounted to before and nearly covered the entire room in ice. Her world was caving in on her, orphaned and alone with a kingdom entirely dependent on her now.

Days later there was a knock on the tall white door to Elsa's room. A different knock than others before, one far too loud and strong to be that of Anna.

"Your highness?" It was the voice of Kai, her father's former private secretary. "I've been sent by your late father's council concerning the arrangements of the regency. Those who will run the kingdom until you come of age. I'm aware of certain, _limitations_ you may have. An in depth knowledge of said limitations. Please, Ma'am. Open the door. I'm here to help."

After some time, Elsa finally did as Kia requested and emerged from her room. Glassy blue eyes and a somber face entirely devoid of color, met the most trusted member of her father's staff, as he delivered the official news that would change her life forever.

"Princess Elsa of Arendelle, I am to formally announce your role as heir to the kingdom of Arendelle will reach majority in three years time. A regency act is currently in place with the council, but the countdown begins now. Your majesty, we have three years to prepare for your ascension to the throne as Queen."

* * *

 _Lots of backstory being laid down, with some more to go before we get to the meat of the story. Thank you to everyone following and reviewing :) I know this leaves a lot of questions to be answered, but that's done so intentionally. Just bear with me. Happy fourth to everyone in the states. I'm off to Disneyland to celebrate my birthday. Also, I just entered the second trimester of my pregnancy and the fatigue has been unpredictable. Updates are coming but I can't really commit to a specified day yet :)_


	3. Rise to Greatness

_Just a warning for some violence in part of the first half, nothing gory or anything. Skip to the end AN if you need further explanation._

* * *

The Southern Isles is a miserable place. The people are pleasant enough but the weather is insufferable. Its detached location out in the North Sea means foggy mornings of endless gray skies that don't burn off until late afternoon at best. It's dark and depressing for most of the year, with harsh winters that bring a bone chilling cold to the entire kingdom. It was not exactly the kind of place Hans was looking forward to staying in the rest of his life.

The weather may have been awful but it was nothing compared to the storm he'd been subjected to over the last twenty years. Teasing and mischievous brothers, whose behavior bordered on abuse. An absent mother and a difficult to please father, who usually made it clear that he believed they had one son too many, and should have kept it at an even dozen. The King of the Southern Isles was not only a deeply religious man, but a superstitious one as well. Hans assuming the role of the thirteenth child always rubbed him the wrong way.

With the betrothal off, Hans was in for an even deeper, and darker nightmare that was about to unfold. The loss of Elsa not only left a gaping hole in his heart, but it took away every last bit of hope he had of leaving behind the cruel words and vicious jabs of the entire Westergard clan. He was officially nothing without her. He had no future, no crown, and according to his family, no reason for living. The thirteenth son only proved to be as unlucky as his place in line to the throne. There were no plans for Hans. He'd never really be destined for greatness. Only the prestige that would have come along with marrying Elsa. His only purpose in life had been squandered by his own father, and every maiden in the kingdom preferred his elder brothers. Nothing but a life of living in a cold and dreary castle, struggling to find a place to fit in, awaited him.

That was until the King received word of the untimely passing of the King and Queen of Arendelle. He'd known Elsa was too young to take the throne and the fate of his closest ally was in the hands of a regency until she came of age. The simple thought of Elsa as queen terrified the man, and his youngest son suddenly became his most valuable asset.

Hans was broken for Elsa over the death of her parents. She had always felt lonely, but he knew she was falling into her usual dark hole one could so easily drown in if not saved. And he feared what would become of her. He knew having that kind of responsibility put on her young shoulders, without him or Anna by her side, must have felt awfully daunting for her. It was a pressure so great that it could snap her like a twig if she wasn't careful.

Scores of letters were inked in the name of sympathy and compassion, leaving Hans' desk sometimes twice a day. Betrothal or not, he still wanted to be with her. His yearning for Elsa wasn't something that could instantly be snuffed out like a burning candle at the end of a long day. There was nothing that said they couldn't marry each other of their own free will. Nothing was going to rid him of the love that flowed in every fiber of his being for his princess. She needed him, now more than ever, and so he wrote her. He wrote Elsa the most important letter of his entire life. In it, he vowed his loyalty; to be there for her. To help her through this tragic time. And at the very end, in his most heartfelt words, he reaffirmed his undying love for her and asked her to marry him.

Every letter Hans wrote after the time he and his father returned from Arendelle never left the Isles. None of the dozens of letters he penned ever made it to Elsa, who waited so desperately for an explanation. Something, _anything_ , that would provide her with some sort of closure. And her final letter never made it to Hans either. It was burned in the hearth of his father's office before anyone else ever got the chance to read its contents. It was a marriage his father had so vehemently pushed for in the beginning, and was now doing everything in his power to keep from happening.

After weeks of no answer, Hans couldn't wait any longer and took matters into his own hands. He refused to accept or even dare to believe that Elsa would outright reject him after everything they'd been through, and he had to hear it for himself. At the very least, he had to tell her that he never chose to break off the engagement. He already knew his father wouldn't approve of such a meeting, so he had to flee the Isles in secret.

Arendelle and the Southern Isles were very close trade partners. Not as close as Arendelle was with the duchy of Weselton, but close enough that at a ship made a voyage to the crocus kingdom at least three times a week to exchange goods. And Hans knew that one of those trips was always on a Monday.

On a frigid Sunday evening, Hans wrapped himself in a gray wool cloak and quietly headed down to the docks just shy of midnight. His parents and brothers were asleep by then and the shipping crews were done loading the vessel for its morning voyage to Arendelle. The sea was inky black and never-ending with no detectable horizon, but appeared calm and motionless in the gleam of the moonlight.

His slick black boots clapped against the wooden slats of the gangplank as Hans left everything behind accept for the clothes on his back. There was nothing to lament over, no regrets, and everything to gain with this one bold move. Most of all, he needed to be reunited with Elsa, for fear that they wouldn't be able to make it without each other.

"Going somewhere, boy?" A dark voice spoke from within the thick fog.

Hans turned with a fright and found his father and four of his brothers at the far edge of the dock, faces grinning wickedly as they slowly approached. Dark red hair reached out towards the endless night as they stood on end at the back of his neck, heart sinking in his chest.

"It's awfully late for you to be boarding a ship to Arendelle. Especially since you have no business there." His brothers sniggered behind the menacing figure of the King. They absolutely lived for days like this. Those wonderful opportunities to tear their little brother down until he didn't have the confidence to even stand on his own two feet. But that wasn't how Hans was going to let it end this time.

"I don't care what you say. None of you want me here. I love her," Hans exclaimed proudly, despite the cackles of his brothers. "She needs me. And I'm going to her."

The King strutted down the length of the dock, followed by his sons; eyes narrowed on his youngest as if his gaze would burn right through him.

"You're wrong, Hans," his father asserted. "I _do_ need you. Your _kingdom_ needs you. Come back inside son, and I will explain everything to you." The King motioned with his head towards the castle but it only prompted a sneer from the thirteenth prince.

"I'm not coming with you," Hans barked, cloudy breath billowing into the cold night air.

Before he could say another word, all four of his brothers grabbed their younger brother, dragged him down the docks, and back inside the castle. He kicked and fought the entire time, but his father happened to pick the biggest boys to help escort Hans against his will. He was no match to them, even for a man driven and powered by love.

Hans was shoved into the throne room, a drafty place that was horridly decorated, and interesting enough, lined by four guards; two on each side of his father. The King took a seat on his throne as Hans' brothers threw him in front of their father. The older man wore a placid expression about his regal features, and it was terribly unsettling to the fear stricken redhead.

A deep sigh reverberated around the room as the King settled back into his chair and lay his beady on his cowering son. "In three years there will be a coronation for that girl, and she will become queen. _You_ will be there to stop her."

"From becoming queen?" It has to be the most outrageous thing he'd ever heard and it had been said so matter-of-factly. But the night was still young, and Hans was in for so much more.

"From existing," the King clarified callously, showing no shame for the implied assassination of his son's former fiancée.

Hans' face screwed up in confusion and he almost laughed at the lunacy of what he was hearing. "What on Earth are you trying to say, father?"

"She's dangerous. And she needs to be stopped."

A small chuckle finally made its way out from Hans. "Elsa is not dangerous," he countered protectively. "You have this all wrong."

"She is a monster!" The King snapped. "A demon. A witch. Sprite. Whatever you want to call it. You think you're in love with some normal girl and the truth is, I'm not entirely sure she's even human. I saw her create ice with her own two hands, that could easily freeze an entire infantry of men. She can summon ice and snow with a simple flinch of her fingers. Blizzards. Avalanches. Hail the size of your head. She could conjure a tempest beyond our wildest nightmares. She is no normal girl, Hans."

Peridot eyes skipped about the polished marble floor of the throne room as Hans tried to digest his father's deplorable words. Even with this Earth-shattering news, his heart refused to abandon his love for Elsa. "She is normal, to me. Despite what you say, she's no demon."

"A girl like that is a one woman army, Hans. Imagine if Napoleon had such powers. The world would be at her mercy. A mere peasant with powers like that would be deadly. But a _monarch_ ," eyes widening to the whites. "A queen, with the powers to bring every kingdoms to their knees. That's a fate we cannot subject the kingdoms of the alliance to. All of their, _our_ , subjects would bow to her. There are no weapons to match what she is capable of. Don't you understand, boy?!"

More afraid of his own father than a ruler with powers, Hans took a few steps back from the King as the situation became more heated. He was instantly taken back to the library, the one he had kissed Elsa in. The flash of her beguiling smile and the sound of her dulcet laugh rushed back into his mind. His darling bride was no monster. A woman who had locked herself away to save her sister for all those years, would never do such a thing. Even if she had the ability to.

"You're mad," Hans shuddered. "You don't know Elsa. She would _never_ do that. She told me. She cares about her people so much, all she wants is what's best for them."

"We trade with Arendelle. Provide them with protection. What's to stop her from neglecting the trade agreement and forcing our people into slavery? Our forces, our navy, would be of no use to her anymore. You are lucky that I am the only one who knows of this, or the other monarchs would have her head already." It was a grim thought but perhaps the truth. No wonder Elsa's father had kept her powers a secret. He was trying to protect her. "The regency will keep things in place until the coronation. Removal of the queen would put her sister, Anna, in line to the throne. That would happen after another three years of the regency and the alliance would be preserved." As if it were that simple.

"What makes you think her sister doesn't have powers?" Hans asked, still dumbfounded by the absurd turn of events.

"Why do you think Agdar kept those girls separated? Why do you think he isolated Elsa for all those years? The rumors are true. Only the queen processes this dark magic. You are the only one closest to her. She trusts you. _Confides_ in you. And we have no way of knowing how or when the opportunity to dispose of her will strike on that day. You _must_ be prepared. Take her into privacy and poison her. Create an accident. Anything that doesn't trace her death back to the Southern Isles, which means back to you."

It had nothing to do with the cold in the room but Hans was shaking now, eyes shifting frantically from his father to his brothers. None of which showed a hint of remorse for the despicable actions they were proposing.

"You'd have to be crazy to think I would go along with this. _Kill_ Elsa?" Shaking his head more violently than his body already was. "I won't do it," Hans shouted and quirked his eyebrows when his father motioned to a guard.

The swift butt of a rifle blasted Hans in the side of his head and a deafening sound rang out in his ears.

"You will," the King insisted, showing no mercy.

"I will not. I would rather die than go through with this." Blood trickled down from Hans' wound but he wouldn't back down.

"I can't kill you. I _need_ you. But if you disobey me, I will bring you so close to the brink of death that you will beg for it to come."

Another blow to the side of the head knocked Hans clear to the floor. He struggled onto his hands and knees before a forceful jab between his shoulder blades sent him flat against the hard marble of the throne room, stomach and ribs slapping the unforgiving ground as he yelp in pain.

"You don't have a choice," the King growled. "Your kingdom depends on you. In time, you will forget about ever having loved that creature, and destroy her for the good of our people. Resisting is not in your best interest. I don't care about you the way a father should. I have no hesitation in going to whatever lengths necessary to get you to comply. Understood?" He spat.

There was no answer. The King's face ignited with rage as he signaled another guard. A boot to the chin caused Hans to taste the metallic zing of blood in his mouth as he groaned in agony.

"Understood?!" The King yelled, voice echoing through the spacious room like a thousand voices pounding against Hans' brutalized ears.

Two more guards moved in and loomed over Hans like the angels of death, the stock of two rifles and two spears aimed at his back. He could barely breathe and his face throbbed thunderously with red-hot bolts of pain. He knew what they were capable of. He knew his father wouldn't stop.

The image of Elsa in that library began to fade. Bright blue eyes and rosy cheeks dissapearing to darkness as his heart shattered to the point where he went numb. His hands were splayed out on the floor, speckled with the blood that had run from his face. Fire ripped through his lungs and then came to a steady halt. This was surrender. The death of his former self and glimpse of the terror to come.

"Yes, sir. I understand."

* * *

Three years had passed and the Kingdom of Arendelle was preparing for Elsa's long awaited coronation. Her gold and purple royal standard graced the streets of town and all was abuzz with the excitement of a new queen and the promise of open gates.

Time had eased the sting of grief and Elsa was now faced with assuming the role she was born to fulfill; queen. It was a huge undertaking. One only a chosen few in history would ever understand the pressures of. The weight of the crown was heavy for most royals, but none so much as it would be for Elsa. Her subjects, staff, and even Anna, her only remaining family, could never find out about her powers or she would be deemed an unfit ruler. The fear of the public's reaction was what kept her father determined to find a solution to her powers all those years. But his time had been cut short, and it was all up to Elsa now.

It was the eve before her coronation as Elsa sat at the large triangular window in her room. A warm July night welcomed her tired eyes as she watched the stars twinkle and dance through the violets and greens of the beautiful stained glass. The moon was full and incredibly luminant, giving off plenty of light to lead in the visiting ships that had come from far and wide to celebrate the crowning of a new queen.

By tomorrow, Elsa would be the most powerful woman in all the land. But dressed in nothing but a simple blue nightgown, with her knees hugged tight against her chest, she couldn't have felt smaller.

Her eyes drifted from the starry sky to the impeccablely crafted gown standing in front of her dressing screen. It was gorgeous. Teal and black with a magenta cloak. Hand stitched rosemaling that had taken weeks and a handful of people to create. She would be the image of perfection for her people. A symbol of tradition and the hope of a thriving nation. All her responsibility now.

Besides her powers, Elsa was deeply saddened by the thought of her most special day being hindered by her crippling anxiety. She wasn't one of those monarchs who felt burdened by their duty. She felt incredibly honored. Her entire life had lead up to this moment. When she would fill her father's shoes and become her people's sovereign. Her heart beat for Arendelle, and she only wished that it could have been a more joyous occasion for her. For everyone.

The small gift of getting to see her sister for the first time in so long brought a slight smile to her face. She'd have to keep it brief, but talking to her sister would be the highlight of her night.

She'd looked over the guest list in preparation for her conversations with the visiting dignitaries. Elsa was more than ready to discuss trade and taxes. Levies and alliances. That was second nature to her now. But one name caught her eye.

The Southern Isles had chosen none other than Prince Hans to represent the kingdom. An act of solidarity or a long awaited reunion, she did not know. And it wouldn't matter. He was just another face amongst the crowd. Three long years had hardened her heart to him. She didn't need anyone. Because she didn't have a choice.

 _You'll be fine, Elsa._

Her father's haunting last words echoed in her mind. How could this be fine? She knew she would be lucky to even control her powers long enough to survive the crowning and party to follow. How would she ever keep her secret hidden for the entirety of her reign? With the passing of her parents, the only people on Earth, besides Kai, who knew the extent of her powers died along with them. Or so she thought.

Alone on his ship, bobbing in the late tide rolling into the fjord, Hans was busy going over the last minute details of his father's plan. Tomorrow would be the day. The day he saved countless kingdoms. The day the alliance would prevail. The day he would kill the Queen.

* * *

 _Warning: Hans is roughed up by some guards using the butt of a gun. Mention of blood._

 _My apologies for a shorter chapter but I had to end it before the events of the film. For the next few chapter that cover the film, I have added nothing. No added scenes or dialog, it's as is. The only thing different is the context and interpretation, I guess I would say. Should be fun :) Have a lovely weekend!_


	4. Secretes and Lies

_Thank you to my beta let-it-geaux._

* * *

Elsa was the first to rise that fateful morning, up before the sun's golden rays began to stretch over the fjord. Even at the crack of dawn, it didn't take long before the people of Arendelle poured into the festival area at the center of the village. Their excitement to step through the gates of the castle was only surmounted by the chance of catching a glimpse of their new queen. It was a day that history would remember. A day in which every Arendellian would bask and rejoice in.

Cheers and laughter echoed from the town as a towering maypole, decorated with the vibrant flora of summer, served as a welcoming point for the arriving dignitaries as they disembarked their ships.

Princess Anna was no exception to the gaiety that crackled within the kingdom, as she scampered and twirled about the castle in celebration of not only her sister's crowning, but also an escape from the life of forced isolation Elsa had mysteriously carried over from her father's rein.

Impeccably swathed in the teal gown that had been staring at her the entire night before, Elsa timidly approached the windows of the library to face the scene she'd been dreading for years- the sight of dozens of guests trickling into the courtyard and chapel area of the castle grounds. She didn't yet possess the walk of a queen because there in the privacy of the library, in the company of her beloved father's portrait, Elsa didn't attempt to hide the fear that surged beneath the shield of velour that covered every inch of her trembling body.

The exquisite bodice and underlying corset were fastened painfully tight, and the deep breath Elsa struggled to intake did absolutely nothing to quell her persistent nerves. For every countless worry that flashed through her mind, another person waltzed over the bridge and closer to the gates as a potential witness to the horrors of her powers.

 _Be the good girl you always have to be._

Elsa dutifully reminded herself of her father's words and gazed almost helplessly into his noble eyes. She had chosen the library specifically to prepare herself in because it bore his presence, forever encapsulated in his coronation portrait, because he was the only person she felt safe taking her gloves off in front of. He never judged her. Never persecuted her. He may have made terrible decisions, but he was her father. And whether he was a good or bad parent, alive or dead, she needed him now in this crucial moment. Because without his memory, she would have been truly alone on the most important day of her life.

Elsa's scared blue eyes gazed up to the dignified man in the enormous painting above, so lifelike that she could almost reach out and touch him. Only feeling the sting of loss when she reminded herself that would never be an option.

He was the utmost example of excellence. Strength, power, and bravery emitted from the once most dominant man in all the land. Yet his face was touched by a twinge of turmoil, making him seem so much more human than those surrounding him assumed he was. Even with no powers of his own, Agdar himself had many fears on coronation day. Proving that no man or woman was impermeable to the pressures of the crown. Which made the path Elsa was about to walk down all the more difficult. She also had the added task of taking the traditional orb and scepter and holding it whilst the bishop officially declared her Queen. All while keeping her most damning secret hidden from everyone. Something her father never had to deal with.

A quick practice with a candle stick holder and decorative bowl proved worthless, frost covering both as soon as the gravity of the situation hit the soon-to-be queen. There was no more time and nothing left in her personal control to prevent what was about to happen. All she could do was slip on her gloves and don the face of queen who was ready to take on the world.

One last steady breath and a straightening of her spine, shoulders pinned perfectly back, and Elsa was ready to make the announcement to open up the gates. Despite what lay ahead or could go wrong, she took it upon herself to be the monarch her father, her people, and even she, expected. The regal stride of a queen graced her ladies in waiting, chin held high as she faced the greatest fear of her life; never looking back. No matter how much of a death march it felt like.

* * *

Down in the town center, Hans had already made his first blunder after being ashore for less than five minutes, before he and his horse, Sitron, knocked a lovely young maiden flat onto her back and into a rowboat.

Three years of precise planning, the wounds of which were still healing underneath his dashing gray jacket, and he had already embarrassed himself. Any screw-ups could cost him time alone with _the queen_ , because no one in the Southern Isles had called her _Elsa_ for the past few years, and he couldn't afford an accident. And before it got better, it got worse. Because it turned out he had hit the queen's younger sister. His exterior demeanor was nothing but apologetic and sincere, a glimpse of the Hans of yesteryear. Five minutes in Arendelle and he already had to give the best apology of his life in order to stay in good standing with the monarchy.

There was something peculiar about the way the princess looked at him though, so full of wonder and fluttering intensity. And then it occurred to him that Anna, who'd probably also been locked away for longer than any sane human should, was _smitten_ with him.

This accident had turned out to be a lucky change in trajectory, and he started to amp up the charm in order to gain her favor, to get to the queen, if nothing else. He even mentally patted himself on the back when Anna mentioned something about Elsa and he didn't even flinch at her name. His father was probably grinning all the way back in the Isles about now. Then she said something that caught his attention.

 _Lucky for you, it's just me._

 _Just me._ That was the part that struck him so fiercely, lightning in the wake of a fortunate misstep. For all of the times Elsa talked about Anna, she had never spoken about them as if they weren't equals. She didn't really even refer to Anna as a princess at all, always her sister. Clearly, Anna didn't feel the same and her declaration of self-worth proved it.

Elsa was on that proverbial pedestal, the born heir with a life of greatness, and Anna just saw herself as… _there_. An extra daughter, should a terrible event occur that required Elsa to be replaced. Well, Anna taking the place of the queen had all been part of the plan all along, but this wide-eyed, freckle-faced girl was so amazingly naive that Hans could hardly believe it. And he ventured that she was also extremely gullible, in addition to being very beautiful. Not _Elsa_ beautiful, but he squashed that thought about his former fiancée down before it grew wings and flew off to some place dangerous.

Anna was the in Hans had been hoping and desperately searching for. The key that would get him close to Elsa. He knew that everyone would be clambering to speak with the queen, and she would only attend to a small chosen few. And if Hans ever wanted to return home with a somewhat pleasant welcome waiting for him, he was going to make sure that Anna got him to be one of those lucky few.

The coronation began in the chapel with heavenly hymns that praised the beautiful queen. Hair of radiant sunshine gleamed as a specially made gold crown was placed upon her head. Hans completely ignored what was going on with the bishop and focused his attention solely on Anna. She obviously fancied him with her emphatic little waves, and this plan was unexpectedly going better than he ever could have imagined. Every time Anna waved at him, he dotingly waved back, flashing her his most love-struck puppy dog face.

* * *

A long break in the middle of the day led to a bountiful celebration in the Great Hall during the evening. Delicious food and mouthwatering desserts covered a large table off to the side of the room. Hans had already helped himself to the champagne, because what better aid to the evening of unfolding scandal than alcohol? It would also help him tolerate Anna more easily. It wasn't that he didn't like her. She was as bubbly as the drink in his hand and exceedingly perky, eyes wider than teacups with the greatest amount of jubilee he'd ever seen one girl possess. He just wasn't interested. Love, women, and even sex, weren't something he cared about anymore. He was a drone in his life, if he could even consider it _his_ life. Or a life at all.

Hans waited obediently for an opportunity to talk to either girl, but they were both busy laughing and catching up at the front of the room. Weselton had already taken a chance at conversing with the queen, even being so bold as to ask her for a dance, but she gracefully refused his request and offered her sister as a partner instead.

Hans kept a watch on the two girls once they reunited after an obscene dance with the Duke. One dance with Hans would sweep Anna so far off her feet, she'd never even remember Elsa was in the room. Which didn't sound like a bad idea. Elsa was the entire reason his life was in this ditch. Her, her father, and her powers were the sole reasons he'd been made into an assassin. Subjected to unspeakable acts in the name of her demise. He _hated_ her.

Too much alcohol led Hans to think that his conversation with the Queen was never going to happen. So he had to make a bold move. As soon as the girls had a rift, Hans was right there to be Anna's valiant white knight. The one she'd always been waiting for to save her ever since Elsa first shut the door on her. And he danced with her until she gleamed brighter than the bountiful moon outside.

He serenaded her, walked the grounds with her. He managed to gain her trust faster than any girl should allow. A million thoughts started to flow through his mind. One being that if he proposed to Anna, they would have to ask for the Queen's blessing. It was tradition and Anna was crazy enough to say yes that night. The other thought was that he didn't have to go home if he married Anna. He couldn't live there with Elsa; she would still have to go. But he could save the kingdom and free himself from a life of torture. Anna was the closest he was going to come to loving anyone anyways, so he asked her. And just like he'd hoped, she said yes.

Hans was all smiles by the time the happy couple returned to the ballroom. Rosy red cheeks aglow with the tickle of champagne colored his features as Anna led him directly to Elsa.

The Queen had been busy talking business with a few dignitaries, worries far behind her now that the ceremony was over. Talking politics was something she'd been taught to do from day one, though she was quite talented when it came to such tasks. She found herself actually having an enjoyable time. The night only got better when she saw Anna come bursting back into the room with… _Hans Westergard?!_

Elsa had been prepared to run into Hans, even talk to him if she had to. But she did not expect to see him arm-in- arm with her _sister._ He couldn't have her so he went straight for Anna? Her baby sister's arms were wrapped around Hans' tighter than rogue branches of ivy, clinging to him as though she would drown if they so much as parted for a second.

The room blurred for a moment, and Elsa was pulled back into reality when Hans greeted her as _your majesty_. A simple nod was all she could manage, and he took note of her rather cold acknowledgement. It was a small mistake on her part because it only fed his disgust of her. Wearing that crown like she was God's gift to her kingdom. Three years seemed to have treated her a lot better than it treated him, and he suddenly found a new _sinister_ enjoyment to the news he was about to blow her over with.

 _We would like your blessing of... our marriage!_

Elsa's eyes had never sprung open so wide in all her life. Her queenly veneer shattered with those very words, and she knew this had to be a dream. It _had_ to have been. She was obviously still fast asleep in her bed, and the coronation hadn't even begun. Or worse, it was reality, and Hans was so hell bent on marrying one of the Arendelle girls that if he couldn't have Elsa, he was going to have Anna. And of course her sheltered little sister would say yes because Anna had no idea her sister's ex-fiancé of eighteen years had just proposed to her. Her head grew exceedingly light, weighed down by only that shiny crown, as she tried to better understand just what in the world was going on.

 _Soup, roast, ice cream and brothers…._

Anna was jabbering on at warp speed, and not only could Elsa not get a word in, she also couldn't dismiss the devious way Hans snapped his eyes to her every time he wasn't swimming in Anna's aquamarines. He was dreamy-eyed and spilling over with love while he clutched Anna's arm. Then he glared at Elsa like he wanted her to feel every ounce of inflicted pain this was causing her. She didn't even know who she was looking at anymore, not even her own sister.

Hans acted like this was some sort of game, so irritatingly complacent and amused by his ability to reopen an old wound in hardly no time at all. He looked like the man she remembered, obviously older. But his personality was completely bereft of any genuine emotion. His behavior was outlandishly garish and disgustingly over-embellished, a flawless affectation of a man Anna had hoped would one day come into her life. He gushed to Anna in a way Elsa didn't recognize, and it rang as utterly deceptive. This was to _hurt_ her. Hans had come all this way to punish her for whatever reason the betrothal had been broken off for, which she was still oblivious to. Before either of them could prattle on a minute more, Elsa decided to put her foot down and straighten this mess out.

No one was getting married, or moving in. She knew all about the Westergard brothers, and apparently, Hans had turned out just like them. But more importantly, some vital information needed to be shared with Anna before she started planning out their honeymoon or naming their unborn children. _God forbid._

A heartfelt request to speak in private, about what was _really_ going on, was abruptly denied, and Anna stood by her new man's side. Seeing her sister steadfastly plastered to Hans' arm was making Elsa's stomach churn almost as much as what the two of them were saying. However Anna took her disapproval, it quickly pinned Elsa as the villain. What appeared on the outside as a controlling sister and a bitterly scorned ex-fiancée was actually an honest attempt to protect Anna from the heartbreak Elsa knew she would most surely endure. Put on the spot to confront the pair in front of the entire ballroom, Elsa steadied herself like a rock and reminded herself that she was not only an elder sister, but queen as well.

 _You can't marry a man you just met._

The best she could, given the circumstances. Her eyes never met Hans' when she spoke, and she was firm in her statement as if it were law. It was a perfectly good reason and secretly signaled to Anna that she had no idea what she was getting herself into. Unfortunately Anna was too blinded by her definition of love to hear her sister out.

 _You can if it's true love._

 _Anna, what do you know about true love?_

What did Anna know about what this man was capable of making her feel? Or how it would gut her when everything he offered was all snatched from her hands without explanation. How it would feel to love someone so much, she would lock herself away from her only sister just to keep her safe. To sacrifice her life for the good of someone else's. Whatever love Anna thought she was chasing, it didn't exist. Elsa and Hans were living proof, right there in front of her, that it was fairytale. Not reality.

A low blow about shutting Anna out made Elsa repeat her refusal to bless the marriage, and she found herself needing to walk away before everything got too far out of hand and over-emotional.

Despite what Elsa's father had wanted her to be, that _good girl_ who always kept her emotions in check, she had a fiery personality for having such chilling powers. She was an extremely emotional woman under all that fairness, because her heart was so big that it felt everything more deeply than maybe she wished it would. It had happened when she fell in love with Hans. She submitted herself and drowned in that love, and it had burned her severely. Her fear burned her every time it pervaded her fragile ego and triggered her powers. _This_ , a marriage between Hans and Anna, would be the end of her, and it was time to exit the disaster of a conversation and evening as well.

But it wouldn't end there because Hans had the audacity to approach her, rattling Elsa so badly that she visibly shook in front the watchful eyes of Anna and all their guests. Elsa struggled with her words as if she were pulling them out of quicksand, trying to keep from making a scene, and told him to leave, following it up with an order to end the party and close the gates. If Hans had half a brain, she hoped he would know _exactly_ why she had said that.

Hans backed off immediately, but Anna pushed forth with a vengeance, creating a huge spectacle and letting every ounce of frustration she'd harbored against Elsa spew out of her like a maelstrom of anger and deep seated pain. She wasn't going to let Elsa leave without hearing her out, even pulling her arm back but catching only her glove instead.

Elsa's now ungloved hand was inches from the doorknob of the room. It would be a less than graceful exit but it would mean freedom from a night that had turned terribly sour. But Anna just wouldn't stop. She demanded an answer from her older sister as Hans remained behind and began to understand some of the animosity that had cultivated between the two sisters over the past thirteen years.

Elsa had done her job. She had survived the coronation and the ball that followed. She'd kept her powers under control and unseen the entire day, and she had been exceedingly proud of herself for doing so well. Her father might have been proud of her in that very moment. His words had been her strength that day. _Conceal don't feel_. And they had proven triumphant.

With the glove still firmly clutched in Anna's hand, Elsa had no way of stopping the subzero tingle of ice beneath her skin and the boiling pot of emotions from erupting at her sister's merciless interrogation. And then everything slipped from her grasp in the blink of an eye.

 _I said enough!_

A wave of her arm and a flick of her wrist send shards of ice shooting up in a massive arc across the ballroom. The menacing creation cracked with fury as the guests frantically jumped out of its path, screaming and gasping at the unbelievable sight. The nightmare Elsa had worked so hard to prevent had finally emerged victoriously and conquered her once and for all. Everyone now knew her secret, and there was nothing she could do to reverse time. Between her and everyone her father had tried to prevent from finding out about her powers stood the darkest secret of the monarchy.

Terror and devastation blanched Elsa's fair features as she cowered against the door like a caged animal desperate for escape. Her eyes flashed first to Anna and then darted over to Hans. It was a moment of realization for all. The secret that explained the last thirteen years for both Anna and Hans.

The smug act Hans had put on came crumbling down as he stared jaw-dropped at the legendary ice he'd heard so much about. Like a visceral reaction, the past seeped its way into the mental barriers Hans' father had put in place over the last three years. Hans remembered every word of fear and sadness Elsa had confided in him. The torment of keeping a secret such as this. He now understood what he didn't know then. A heavy remorse was replaced by a tragic confirmation of the truth. Elsa processed powers that had limitless capabilities. As much as Hans hated his father and all he'd done to him, the man had been right.

 _Sorcery. Magic._

 _Elsa..._

A ballroom of judgment and condemnation stared back at the short-lived Queen. Fight or flight had taken over, and with no other option, Elsa burst through the heavy wooden door and fled in shame. She didn't get far before the crowd of townspeople stopped her dead in her tracks, wanting to give the Queen their messages of congratulations, while Elsa simply wanted to run and hide from the horror that had just unfolded. The welcoming faces of her people and applause deafened the sound of her scrambling feet as she tried to find a way through the mass of villagers.

Another accident went off, this time with the fountain, and she turned the flowing water into a hideous frozen spout of razor sharp ice. The hunt was on now, and Weselton and his men were were leading the way, frightening Elsa to the point where a blast of magic knocked the three of them off their feet, despite her warnings to stay away.

 _Monster! Monster!_

 _She's a monster!_

 _Get back!_

Elsa held her exposed hand, and though it broke her heart, her people were right. Staying in Arendelle would only scare and potentially harm the very subjects she swore to serve and protect. In her first act as queen, she would do exactly that; put the kingdom's safety above all else. Even if that meant exiling herself from the only home she'd ever known.

The persecutory names and aghast faces were all the signals Elsa needed, and she took off across the courtyard.

Anna was now hot on her trail as Elsa stumbled down the stairs and was stopped cold by the deep waters of the fjord. Fear and her magic may have cost her the crown, but it was that same magic that lit a glorious path to freedom, freezing the water in an intricate pattern of winter with each touch of her foot.

 _Elsa, please!_

Nearly a lifetime of having to put Anna's safety ahead of her own feelings made it all the more easy to disregard her sister's pleas to stay. Especially when one Prince Hans was right behind still by Anna's side. Once upon a time, Elsa and Hans had been destined to save each other from the misery their lives had become, and now, Elsa was doing that for herself.

One brave step onto the ice created a thicker and brighter path to follow, majestic blues and electric aquas radiating out into the same snowflake shape she'd seen her entire life, and Elsa didn't even bother to take one last look back before she dramatically sprinted across the fjord faster than her feet could carry her, fading into the black of night as a lamination of ice discharged across the bay. Ships were locked in a prison of permafrost, groans and creaks of the relentless ice freezing everything it made contact with. Hans gasped at the power of Elsa's magic, shocked at the massive scale of damage she'd done in no time at all. Everything changed for him from that moment on because he was genuinely afraid. For himself? For Arendelle? Of Elsa? He didn't even know.

The plan to kill the Queen was still on, as far as Hans knew, and as the villagers murmured amongst themselves, Weselton continued to do his part to set up the scene for Hans to appear as the prince of good intentions. That had been the deal all along. _Two allies were better than one_ , the King had told him. Hans picked up on the witch-hunt Weselton was organizing against Elsa, calling her a monster and saying she had to be stopped, insisting that his guards go after her. In the end, the King of the Southern Isles and Weselton didn't care who took Elsa out. It didn't have to be Hans. He was chosen simply because he was one of the few who knew her well enough to get close to her and could get away with it. Now that Elsa's powers had made themselves known to the world, it gave the allies a powerful reason to kill her without having to hide anything from anyone. A monstrous queen who nearly hurt innocent subjects had already doomed herself.

* * *

 _This was almost a teaser for what's coming up in the next chapter. I'm only focusing on the helsa scenes, mainly. I know a lot of it is a reiteration of what we've already seen, but you have to see how these events fit into the context of the story so that we can get to the really exciting meat of this fic in after next chapter. And I promise this thing will only get better from here on out :)_


	5. Beautiful, Powerful, Dangerous, Cold

When Hans arrived at the ice castle, he was struck speechless by its awe-inspiring grandeur. It dwarfed the guards on their horses, towering over them as if the crystalline structure had descended from Heaven itself, but it wasn't frightening by nature.

The fortress of ice was gorgeously constructed and, in any other location, or material, would have been worthy of a cathedral. The attention to detail was astounding, magnificent turrets and ornate spires shined like prismatic glass, and Hans couldn't help but think that it was all created by those slender little hands that used to write him so many heartfelt letters in perfect cursive.

Hans ordered that no harm was to come to the Queen, and in that moment he meant it. They couldn't very well go in and kill her without a warrant to do so. If her death was going to become public knowledge, it was to be done cleanly and legally. Setting off an eternal winter wasn't reason enough, and they needed Elsa alive to thaw the freeze.

Almost instantly upon arrival, the men were met with the ominous force that was Marshmallow. The other men tried to attack the fearsome beast but were easily brushed aside. All except for Hans, who was too swift and deft for the great snow monster. His swordsmanship skills were exemplary of the military pride that the Southern Isles was known for. Their ability to be the last men standing was why they were one of Arendelle's most trusted allies in the first place. Their precision and execution were simply unbeatable.

While Hans dispatched Marshmallow, Elsa's sanctuary was ripped at the seams as Weselton's guards chased her down in her own castle like a fawn in an open meadow. No matter how fast she ran, they caught up with her in the main living quarters at the top of the staircase.

They pushed her to the point where she had to defend herself, forcing herself to command her powers to do harm to someone for the first time. Before, in the ballroom, flight had won out and she was able to escape into the mountains. In the confines of her castle, escape was not an option, leaving her to fight for her life.

Her anger swirled like a viscous cyclone as the guards continued to attempt to kill her on their own, arrows aimed directly at her pounding heart. Every bit of contempt for what they'd made her do, the freedom they'd taken away, transformed into a wild rage that Elsa had no hope of controlling. A block of ice pushed a guard to the edge of the balcony with the force of a blizzard, death threatening him as soon as her powers increased with the most ferocious look blazed across her furious face.

Elsa gritted her teeth so hard trying to summon enough strength to send the man careening into the ravine below that her teeth and jaw felt like they would shatter from the pressure.

A legion of footsteps thundering into the room could be heard behind her but didn't succeed in breaking her concentration. She was far too consumed by rage to realize her powers were corroding her mind.

When Elsa had embraced her powers for the first time on the mountain, it was a celebration of joy that had culminated in the most glorious creation she'd ever masterminded. With happiness, she created beauty. Fear made her lose control entirely. And anger brought about a malevolent force within her that was truly dangerous. The ice surged through her body so rapidly that it burned, but she couldn't feel anything except for contempt.

 _Queen Elsa, don't be the monster they fear you are._

Hans used the two words he knew would get through to Elsa. Her name and her title. Hearing him say her name would snap through the wall of fury blocking her brain from thinking rationally. And her title would remind her that she still had subjects back in Arendelle that were afraid of the very thing she'd become.

His words penetrated through her trance like an electric shock, and Elsa felt the weight of regret and fear weaken her. She was amazed by how her powers had taken over so strongly and stared at her hands in disbelief.

The delay provided one of the guards a clean shot to her back, but Hans caught the move out of the corner of his eye. With only seconds to spare, Hans manhandled the crossbow and aimed it at the ceiling before it was fired.

Elsa's life had been spared for a brief second until she realized the arrow had hit the chandelier directly overhead. It came crashing down in a spectacular display, forcing Elsa to run faster than she was able to and fall against the ice with a hard smack of her body against the ground. Her head suffered a blow powerful enough to knock her unconscious, and she lay motionless on the floor of her castle as the guards gathered around her.

Amber lights that had once illuminated the walls of the hexagonal room began to fade into a depressive dark brown as Hans stepped carefully to Elsa's side. There was enough damning evidence there to condemn her to death on the spot, but all he could do was look at her with the kindest of eyes.

She was slumped onto her side, helpless and devoid of any signs of life except for the rise and fall of her chest, rhythmic breaths of life giving him the assurance he needed.

Hans momentarily forgot where he was, and _who_ was watching for that matter. In the deafening quiet of the aftermath, he was able to see just what she'd done to herself. What she had become. They called her a monster, but she looked like anything but.

That fine-spun hair he'd always seen bound back so tight, even just the day before, was down in a loose thick braid. He never knew how long her hair was until then, and he was mesmerized by the pattern in which her bangs had been slicked back, like they'd been licked by flames. Tiny glittering ice crystals buried in the loose strands of platinum locks brought him to the conclusion that she must have used her own ice to achieve such a unique look. It also explained why the color seemed so much closer to white than he ever remembered.

Her hair wasn't the only thing that had been frosted. His hand pressed against her freezing cold cheek, and he was acutely aware of how extremely pale she was, almost deathly so. But the white of her skin only brought out the deep wine red of her lips. Lips that had once been on his so very long ago. How could he ever forget? Her thick eyelashes were impossibly black and full against her blushed cheeks. Darker eye shadow of a stunning shimmering purple covered her soft lids and added a dramatic flair to her striking new appearance. Just the profile of her face was more gorgeous than he'd ever seen her before.

His eyes shifted down to make sure Elsa was still breathing, unable to let her uncovered shoulder go unnoticed. In fact, the dress made entirely of ice was not only magnificent in color and luminosity, its cut revealed parts of her body he'd never seen before. He scanned the rest of her dress, surprised to see the lower half of a slim porcelain leg peeking out from the knee-length slit.

Whatever had happened, this must have been how she truly wished to be. She was breathtaking before, but the palace, the dress, her overall look were signs of a woman who had burst from the shelter of her cocoon and spread her wings at the first taste of freedom. It was an Elsa he wished he would have had the opportunity to know. The young girl he had come to know had metamorphosed into a magical being that embraced her powers, unbound by secrets, fear, or even the traditions of her position as queen.

He'd lost sight of the battle he was supposed to have been waging on her, memory of the heart proving to be much stronger than any brainwashing he'd endured to try and make him think otherwise. No matter how badly he wished for things to be different, for the lifeless body in his arms to be his once again, Hans couldn't save her from the damage she'd already inflicted upon herself by almost sending a guard to his death in front of her own men.

He pressed a hand to her chest, minding the feminine curve of her collarbone, and could feel her heart still pounding from the exertion of energy used to nearly kill a guard and dodge a falling chandelier. Every part of her was like a delicate white dove. How could one so angelic be capable of such deadly force? It was a conflict of the heart that tore at his very being. To still love her so much but know that her demise was in his hands. However, he had this one brief moment to enjoy her beauty and remember what once was.

Elsa wasn't even wake, and yet she still had the ability to make his body sing, plucking his heartstrings and making him resonate with joy just with her presence alone.

His heart throbbed heavily when he thought of how Elsa would have looked similar to what she was then on their wedding day, being that they were just six months shy of her 22nd birthday. The face of a woman, not a girl, would have met him at the altar. Perhaps wearing a dress not as sparkly as the one she had on now, but something just as grand. Something just for him, meant to make him smile and beam with pride at his blushing bride.

Hans didn't have to kill her then. Not only would his heart forbid him because it felt so right to have her in his arms again, but he needed to undo the curse she'd unleashed over the kingdom. Whether he stayed with Anna or returned home, Arendelle and its allies could not survive with the land locked in an eternal winter. Her life had been spared at her own expense, the only one who could stop the freeze, but Hans knew it was short lived. He needed to get himself together and figure a way out of this mess. A faulty mind with love coursing through his veins was a dangerous state to be in.

* * *

Darkness greeted Elsa when she finally woke, aching head nestled against a small pillow and her body covered in a thin wool blanket. The guards had shackled her hands in specially made restraints, being that they were the only ones who knew that they existed. Even Elsa was unaware of such devices, or who had even had them made.

It was Hans who pulled the blanket over her and slipped the pillow under her head. He resisted kissing her cheek when they had a moment of privacy. Just one more moment to savor what he had missed over the torturous three years. Prisoner or not, he insisted that the Queen was to be comfortable, especially after enduring such physical trauma during her capture.

 _Shackles._

He knew how it felt to be a prisoner and wanted to make the brutal awakening she was going to have a little more tolerable by knowing someone had cared enough to tend to her comfort.

Elsa awoke peacefully enough but was shocked by the blindingly bright light emitting from the cell's slit of a window. The entire kingdom was covered in a thick sheet of her snow, and the epic nature of her mistake crashed down on her like a landslide.

A creak of the door made her think a guard was coming into the room, but it turned out to be none other than Hans. A lantern illuminated his surprisingly sullen face as he intentionally assumed a non-threatening stance. His breath fogged up in fluffy white clouds as Elsa came to realize it was _he_ who had transported her back to the castle.

 _Why did you bring me here?_

All cordialities had gone out the window now that they were in private and the kingdom was in serious trouble. Elsa assumed Hans probably thought he was doing a good thing by bringing her back, but he'd only made the problem worse. The only one who seemed to understand how Elsa's power worked was her.

Hans was almost taken aback by how casually she addressed him, as if no time had passed in the last three years. There were no formalities or silent treatments mucking up their conversation.

 _I couldn't just let them kill you._

If only she knew about the mental turmoil he had struggled with up on that mountain. How he'd gazed at her affectionately while she slept.

Hans strode up to her in his tall black boots without too much hesitation, familiarity taking over as he stepped even closer to her. It was close enough that had he been anyone else, she would have considered it an invasion of her personal space and stepped away. It frustrated her, but in a world where she was now the enemy, she needed as many people on her side as possible, including Hans since it didn't seem like he'd completely turned his back on her.

His voice was more grave than usual, but it was a grave situation they were facing.

Elsa tried to explain that _she_ was the cause of the increasing conditions outside and demanded Hans get Anna. He had to give the unfortunate news that she hadn't returned. That being no one's fault but her own, and he tried his best to not make Elsa feel guiltier than she already did.

Hans took another daring step closer, and it was enough to get her to turn her head away from the ensuing disaster outside.

 _If you would just stop the winter. Bring back summer, please._

He didn't know what he was asking of her. In all the words they'd ever exchanged, she'd never been able to confess her powers or the true danger behind them.

 _Don't you see? I can't._

 _I can't._ It rang in his head over and over. Of course she couldn't. Having powers alone wouldn't drive someone into isolation. She'd been keeping a secret, never knowing when and if it would ever get out. The ice his father spoke about and the stomping of her foot that day was frustration over her inability to control her powers.

Elsa was no monster all. No witch. No all-powerful monarch waiting to bring the world to its knees with the threat of eternal frost. Elsa was an unlucky woman forced to live with powers she didn't process the ability to control. It was tragic. The worst tragedy he could think of because, even though none of this was intentional, she would still be the one to bear the blame. The others would never see it any other way. And if Elsa couldn't stop the winter, there was only one other way to end it.

No matter what his heart told him, her death had been sealed with her confession. Kill the queen, end the winter. Save the kingdom. There was no choice.

The shock melted from Hans' face when Elsa begged him to tell the guards to let her go. She knew that the farther away she got, the safer Arendelle was. But it still didn't solve the problem of her eternal winter.

Hans hardened himself, stoically detaching all emotion from Elsa and saw her as nothing more than means to an end his father had spoken about. She was walking dead to him now.

Hans left much more coldly than when he'd arrived. The undertone of annoyance in his voice made Elsa question if he was really going to help her or not. Time wasn't waiting to find out, and as Elsa's fear over Anna and her kingdom soared, frost began to rapidly branch out over her shackles.

Hans decided that the only productive thing he could do was to go search for Anna himself. He'd been able to bring back the Snow Queen and was really the only one getting anything done around the kingdom.

Proposing to Anna wasn't enough to ensure his stay in Arendelle, and with the way things were going, the sooner they swapped vows the better. After everything that happened, he wasn't going back to the Southern Isles.

As fate would have it, Anna returned before Hans even made it out of the library. Her single streak of white hair had flourished since her disappearance, and she was oddly insistent that Hans kiss her. Poor, trusting, honest Anna was about to make a huge error.

 _Elsa struck me with her powers._

 _She froze my heart and only an act of true love can save me._

 _Save me_. That meant Anna was dying. That wicked side Hans' father had been fostering began to rise to power with those words. Anna dying meant he didn't have to live or rule with her. He didn't even to marry her when everyone in Arendelle would believe him if he swore they exchanged vows before her final breath.

Hans could have just kissed her, but he didn't love her. Over Anna's shoulder was the chess set he'd once played with Elsa. On the other side was the sitting area where they had passionately kissed for the first time as adults . They'd avowed their love and sought refuge in each other from the storms of their tumultuous young lives.

The one time Hans had felt love, _really_ felt it in his bones and with every beat of his heart, had been at that window. His heart had been ripped out, stomped on, and hung out to dry by his family. Elsa was right. What did Anna know about true love? True love hurt, and it was dangerous. Feeling that deeply for someone only made them more vulnerable to the cruelty of the world. He would never love again after Elsa. He would never love Anna.

Her bright teal eyes gazed into his as if he were her heroic savior, haloed in the light of the crackling fire like a heavenly angel. A fairytale moment of her prince bestowing her with a kiss that would save her life.

It took every ounce of strength not to laugh in her face. She was a fool to believe in love. If Anna learned one lesson before she died, Hans was going to make sure it was about heartbreak. The same kind he had endured from Elsa and his family. She was so naive and innocent, a pampered little princes with the world at her feet, and he couldn't wait to snap her like twig.

The kiss that almost was never happened. He waited until he took her to the brink of elation before smashing every hope and dream Anna ever had in that pretty little red head of hers.

 _Oh, Anna. If only there was someone who loved you._

The satisfaction was euphoric. For the first time in so long Hans felt good. Amazing. The suffering of others was grossly cathartic. His blood pumped faster, and his smile curled wider. Being good had never gotten him anywhere. Being bad would take him to a throne of his own.

He divulged his new plans to Anna, keeping the real secret for himself. Saying that he was there to kill Elsa to save the alliance didn't hurt her as bad as making her feel used. And he didn't exactly lie, Elsa _was_ preferable. In every way to him.

The beauty of Anna's death was that Hans didn't have to do a thing except lock the door behind him when he left. The real person to blame was for her death was Elsa. And with blood on Elsa's tiny little hands, it gave him the authority to rightly execute her.

Every kingdom would win in the end. The Southern Isles and the alliance would be secure. Hans' father wouldn't have his son's head. And Hans would never have to go home again. In fact, he could sit on his own throne and raise a nation ten times stronger than his father's. What a day that would be to see his father beg him, King Hans of Arendelle, for his kingdom's precious goods. Fate had been cruel to Hans in the past, but his future had never looked brighter than it did now. The plan without a plan had worked, waiting long enough for the pieces to fall into place so that Hans could be triumphant.

Elsa was quickly accused of treason and sentenced to death by the same man who would have been her husband. The lies flowed from his lips so easily that it almost scared Hans how simple taking over a kingdom could be.

Only when he went to get Elsa and bring her to face her death, had he discovered that she'd already managed to escape. That angered Hans more than anything, but if there was one person who could wrangle her back to the castle, besides Anna, it was him. This had been the exact reason why his father had chosen him, and he was going to exploit their relationship for his own good this time.

The plume of a raging storm could been seen from the hilltops as Elsa's fear spiraled out of control, finding her second attempt to flee her kingdom more difficult than the first.

Hans threw on his cloak and braved the sting of sleet to go after Elsa. She had been the reason his life had turned upside down, and she was going to give him the life he deserved back.

The blizzard whirled with a force so great that neither Hans nor Elsa could see where they were going. He followed the wispy blue cape through the whiteout, pursuing her like a bloodhound.

She caught a glimpse of him once before gasping and trying to get away unnoticed, but Hans had already seen her. And he knew exactly what to say to get her to stop. Hans' blood ran as cold as the storm, blue ice through a cold heart. His eye was already set on the prize, and his sword was by his side.

 _Elsa, you can't run from this._

The first time he called her by name since he had arrived, sans title. It was enough to get Elsa to stop, peaked face hollow with desperation.

 _Just... take care of my sister._

As much as the idea of a marriage between them made Elsa's blood curdle in the beginning, she didn't trust anyone more than Hans to look over her beloved sister. That was all she cared about.

 _Your sister? She came back from the mountains. Cold and weak. I tried to save her, but it was too late. Her skin was like ice and her hair turned white. Your sister is dead, because of you._

The final knife to the heart had been delivered not only by Hans, but by life itself. Elsa had lost her parents, Hans, her kingdom, and now her sweet baby sister. The cruelest part being that it had been Elsa herself who had killed her. Hans presumed Anna's life had already been extinguished in the library, and, in a twisted way, was telling the truth. Using it as a weapon to slay the fallen queen in a blizzard of her own making.

Grief hit Elsa like a sonic blast that came in waves. Instant disbelief followed by the darkest sadness one could ever feel. Hans could see the strength being sucked out of every muscle and fiber of her body as Elsa shuffled and collapsed on the ice.

The force of her tears was so strong that all Elsa could hear was the pounding pressure of pain inside her head.

The sight of his former love broken and shattered like the chandelier in her palace stopped him for a minute. A single flicker of remorse died with the last bit of Hans before the man his father engineered rose to life in full force.

The power of Elsa's emotions caused the storm to dissipate mid air. A scattering of snowflakes suspended by grieve were the only thing standing between Hans and his ultimate fate.

With Elsa drowning in sorrow, Hans began to slowly approach the Snow Queen and pulled his sword from his scabbard. Glory, power, and magnificent freedom had Hans feeling an extreme euphoria, dizzy with glee as he wielded his sword above the curled up queen below. A downward swing and Hans prepared himself for the gore to come when he made contact with a rock hard force that blew him back faster than an atomic blast. It was Anna. Using her last breath, she chose to save her sister in the ultimate sacrifice for love before freezing to death.

* * *

"Your Majesty," Kai said softly as he entered the Queen's private office. "I know it doesn't feel like the time for such things, but we must. What do you wish to do with Weselton?"

Elsa's jaw tightened, body brittle and upright in her chair. "End all trade. Forever."

"As you wish," nodding his head. "And what about the Prince?"

Her eyes blinked and shifted away from where Kai was standing in front of her desk. She swallowed thickly, throat bobbing with emotion and shock.

"You can have a trial. He could face death for treason."

Death. That seemed all too easy. And in the end, it didn't make her any better than him. Besides, there was a much worse punishment that awaited him.

"Release him to the Southern Isles. Make sure the King and his brothers know what he's done here. And that I'm holding them responsible for his punishment."

"Yes, ma'am. Is there anything I can do for you?"

"No. Just leave me be until my sister awakes."

"As you wish, madam."

* * *

 _Now we finally get to the good part of his story, and updates should come much sooner since most of it is already written out. Hope you're all enjoying this :) Thank you to all the reviews, readers, and followers. You all are the sweetest._


	6. Winds of Change

_Thank you to my wickedly talented beta, let-it-geaux._

* * *

The time immediately after the Great Thaw brought great highs and great lows for the newly-crowned queen of Arendelle. Elsa and Anna's reunion was, of course, the highest of the highs. They spent their more carefree days making up for lost time and living out the childhood that they only had a brief taste of. Anything Anna wanted, Elsa obliged to her fullest.

Slumber parties, ice skating, snowman building, exploring the village. The adventures were endless. The new policy of "no closed doors" made it easier for the girls to come and go as they pleased, spending as much time with each other as they could. And in many ways, Elsa had never been happier.

However, there was an emotional debt to pay as well. The residual trauma from her childhood and coronation left Elsa facing many of her worst fears at night. Many feelings that she'd pushed to the back of her mind found a way to creep out during her most vulnerable times. She'd wake up in a cold sweat, gasping in terror from the image of her beloved sister freezing to death out on the solid fjord. The sound of Hans' sword violently hitting her sister's frozen hand and shattering replayed through her mind and made her heart pump so furiously that she thought she was going to have a heart attack.

Anna was there to listen and comfort her older sister for most of the months following the coronation, and it brought them closer together. She even held Elsa's trembling hand as they journeyed out to the peak of the fjord where their parents' grave markers rested. It was a cathartic release that brought Elsa to her knees, finally giving her the closure she so desperately needed regarding their death.

Despite the low times, Elsa's twenty-second birthday ushered in some uplifting moments for the sisters. The town celebrated with lavish festivities in the main square, but the queen herself spent a quiet evening alone with Anna. That was all she asked for, besides chocolate cake.

As spring began to bloom across the kingdom, so did Elsa's bubbly personality that had been hidden for so long. She took to the daily tasks of being supreme sovereign like a duck to water. Leading a country was what she had been groomed to do since her birth, and it flowed through her blood like it was her sole calling to life. Being queen was exceptionally fulfilling, and she'd come to dearly love her people.

In the summer, they celebrated Anna's nineteenth birthday with a grand affair ordered by the queen herself. Even a feverish cold couldn't stop her from throwing Anna the biggest birthday party she'd ever had.

When Anna finally convinced her sister to go to bed after the party that night, Elsa spent the time reflecting on something interesting that had happened that day. Kristoff had told Anna he loved her. Sang and practically shouted in front of all their guests was a more accurate description.

Elsa had been so busy trying to recapture her sisterly bonding and plan the most perfect birthday that she'd completely missed what was transpiring between the princess and the ice harvester before her very eyes.

One afternoon, as she was retiring to her office after a long morning of meetings, Elsa heard laughter from the courtyard and found Anna and Kristoff canoodling over a bouquet of wild flowers he had picked her on his most recent trip into the mountains. She looked on, happily smiling to herself as Anna hugged and kissed Kristoff with the light of the world glinting in her jubilant eyes. There was no denying that her little sister was in love. _Really_ in love this time and had matured enough to know that what she had was worth holding onto.

Elsa came to understand, though it was difficult being the older, protective sister, that Kristoff provided Anna with a happiness she never could. Not that what he offered was better or worse or even measurable in the same way as sisters. But a husband and a family was something she knew Anna wanted sooner than later.

It wasn't long after Anna's birthday that the pair asked Elsa to bless their marriage, and she gave it to them wholeheartedly. Kristoff was a good man who would protect her sister and treat her well, probably better than any other man in Arendelle. And after a full year, it was difficult to say no to such an adorable couple.

* * *

Back in the dreary Southern Isles, Hans had returned home with fear shaking him to his very core. His only prerogative had been to kill the queen, and he had failed miserably. He had actually been hoping that Elsa would have kept him prisoner in Arendelle or even had him executed for his crimes. But she went one step further and sent him home to his family.

The only stroke of luck Hans had in over four years was the fact that his father had become severely ill during the weeks leading up to the coronation. Typhoid fever had bedridden the man, and after several months, Hans' eldest brother, Crown Prince Caleb, took over royal duties.

Caleb carried out his father's orders and made sure that Hans was subjected to a beating he would never forget, and then sent him away to the various islands of the kingdom to carry out manual labor. Hans wasted away under the dark clouds of the depressing land digging irrigation canals, cleaning stables, and laying bricks to protect towns from the pounding surf of the unforgiving North Sea.

A year after the coronation, Hans was back on the main island where the royal family lived in their gothic-style castle that loomed over the village. It was dark and ominous, nothing like the splendor of the whimsical castle of Arendelle. The king's condition had worsened and Caleb was eventually appointed the acting regent of the Isles. Trade with Arendelle had suffered severely; Elsa saw to that, giving them a constant reminder of her disdain of what had happened at her coronation. But she couldn't afford to cut off ties completely because her entire allied military, including their ships, came from the Southern Isles.

It was amongst those very ships down at the shipyard where Hans was scrubbing and shining the decks of the massive vessels for delivery, that Caleb came to him with some life-changing news.

"Hans, stop what you're doing." The eldest Westergard's face was long and pained, like he bore the weight of the world. Hans had seen that look in Elsa's fragile eyes once. A look that only a monarch about to take on the biggest responsibility of his or her life could possess.

Hans set the mop that had blistered his aching hands aside and approached the prince respectfully, dusting off his filthy clothing, though it did little good to improve his bedraggled appearance.

"The king is dead," Caleb rasped, flat and glassy-eyed.

The former prince immediately bent down and gazed up at the new reigning king of the Southern Isles. "Long live the King," he praised wearily, the years of forced labor and self-inflicted emotional torment so evident in his broken voice. The spirit that once thrived in his bright green eyes had all but faded. Soulless and defeated by the cruelty of life.

Caleb motioned towards the castle, having nothing but sympathy for his disgraced younger brother. "Go inside and clean up. There's a funeral, and eventually a coronation, to attend, and we can't have you looking like you do. Besides, you deserve a hot bath and warm meal in your own home for once."

The sudden display of kindness and pity from his brother baffled Hans, but he was too afraid to seek out Caleb's motivation. Instead, he gave his brother a tired nod and headed to the castle to wash up.

* * *

Hans went through the motions of the funeral like an empty shell of a man. He had no heart. He was pretty sure he didn't even have a soul anymore. Every morning, he got up and forced himself to get through the day. He fully accepted his punishment and often thought of Elsa whenever he wanted it all to end. The pain he felt, physical and psychological, was what he believed he owed her. Despite what his father had done to him and ordered him to do, Hans knew he'd gotten carried away in the end and could never forgive himself. Each day that passed, the walls his father made him put up began to crumble, allowing Elsa's memory and the events of the coronation to flood his mind like a leaking damn he knew would one day burst.

"Hans, I want to talk with you," the newly crowned king said to him a few weeks later inside the mighty throne room. The same room in which he'd been stripped of his life and of his love for the woman of his dreams. "This has to end. What you did… I wasn't aware of the circumstances in which it all unfolded."

A painstakingly long beat loomed over the men, Caleb struggling to even speak.

"Father confessed on his deathbed about how you became involved with the attempted assassination on the queen. What you endured. And I have no doubt believing it because I was coerced into my actions towards you as well." Hans remained silent, feeling nothing. "I look at you, and I see a man who's lost and is still so very young. You have your whole life ahead of you. You should make something of it."

As if his body had betrayed him, Hans' eyes began to pool with warm tears. For what life could a man like him ever look forward to?

"What is it you'd like to do? Some way you can serve the kingdom that helps build trust and respect with our people."

Hans swallowed and gave the question some thought, pursing his lips as he squashed the thought of fleeing to see the forbidden blonde and tell her everything.

"Working on the ships; I see the navy performing their exercises out at sea. I like the sea. I think I'd make a good sailor. It's the only thing that I find interesting these days."

Caleb nodded and pressed a hand to his mouth while he weighed his options. "I think serving your people through the military is a respectable choice. However, I will need the queen's blessing."

"The queen?" Hans asked, a twinkle in his eye for the first time in years.

"Yes. I keep the queen of Arendelle informed of your punishment and activities, as part of the agreement for your release." Caleb reached over the side of his towering chair and grabbed a metal box. The corners were rusted and the painted was chipping off of it. "This is for you."

"What it is?" Taking the dirty box into his weathered hands.

"Your letters. Father asked to have them destroyed, but Claudius buried them in the woods. Not all of us despise you, Hans. You have twelve brothers, some of us have good intentions."

The tears that had been welling fell onto the corroded metal box. He would never get her back, but through the kindness of at least two of his brothers, he could have a piece of his princess forever.

"Thank you," Hans quavered, clinging to the box as his shoulders jumped from trying to suppress the sheer shock of getting a chance at a new life.

"Meet the admiral at the docks at sunrise. I'll make sure he knows to expect you. I'll wait for the queen's response in the meantime." That was all Caleb said before Hans nodded and started to walk out of the room.

"Caleb," Hans said over his shoulder. "When you write to her, tell her I want to make her proud."

* * *

The day of Anna's wedding was bittersweet for the queen. It was a beautiful early spring day, as bright and vibrant as the blushing bride. With their parents gone, and absence greatly felt, Elsa stepped in for her father and stoically walked her only sister, her only living family member, down the aisle and to her waiting husband-to-be. She felt as a father would have that day, giving over a part of her precious gem of a sibling to a man who had more that earned the chance to call Anna his wife. She even took the day seriously enough to wear her traditional clothing, teal rosemaled dress and long magenta cape gracing the long aisle of the chapel next to Anna's angelic silk train. No gloves.

A night of music, good company, and even better food followed the beautiful ceremony. The newlyweds danced the night away as Elsa looked on as proud sister, excited for Anna's new adventure into holy matrimony. As inseparable as they had been over the last year and a half, it was a time of great change that wasn't easy to adjust to but seemed to have always been in the cards for the girls. Growing up didn't mean having to grow apart, their family only expanding with time.

The wedding had been nothing short of spectacular. Kristoff and Anna had never been more overjoyed, never looked so in love. After bidding the last of the guests goodnight, Elsa had trudged up the stairs to her room and passed the marital suite along the way. Sounds of Kristoff and Anna consummating their marriage crept out from under the door, much to Elsa's surprise. And as awkward as it was to hear her sister and brother-in-law in the throes of passion, she had been happy for them. Happiness had quickly been snuffed out by jealously.

Elsa had dragged herself to her room and readied herself for bed, releasing her hair from its tightly coiled chignon with a loud sigh of relief. She laid in bed, thoughts flowing like a restless river with the help of champagne still running through her veins. She loved her sister dearly and was truly happy for her, but it had been Elsa who was to marry first. She was the one who was supposed to walk down that aisle, white flowing dress and all, and meet her prince at the alter. They were to say 'I do' and live happily ever after. But it had not been meant to be.

That day, her father should have walked her down the aisle. And her mother would have shed a tear or two from the pew. And her handsome prince, who had promised to love her for all eternity, was supposed to have been Hans.

Her father would never walk her down the aisle. And her mother would never cry from the pew. And her groom would never be Hans.

A few days later, Anna and Kristoff set off on their honeymoon to one of the royal family's estates in the Arendellian countryside. Elsa watched the young newlyweds gather into the carriage, giggling and kissing like the happiest couple ever to walk the face of the Earth, and waved goodbye as they rode off into the mountains.

A wedding had finally occurred, but it had not been her own like Elsa had once hoped. Her kingdom and her family were what consumed her time now. But with Anna gone, it left her with an unusual amount of free time. Time to think. Time to dwell. Time to remember.

* * *

The day after Anna and Kristoff departed for their honeymoon, Elsa found herself roaming the rich red halls of the castle. With the wedding now behind them, the halls were oddly quiet. Only a few meetings had been on the schedule, nothing too strenuous. Lunch and dinner the day before had been taken alone, as well as breakfast that morning. One solitary queen at the head of a table for at least twelve. Needless to say her appetite wasn't all that great without her sister's delightful morning banter.

It hadn't taken long for the sadness and the tears to come for Elsa and envelope her entirely. The pain of her parents passing, coupled with the ultimate heartbreak by a man who had become her attempted murderer, had been too much to bear for the young queen. With Anna now married to Kristoff, it left Elsa very much alone. Thirteen years of isolation had been enough, and all this time by herself wasn't sitting well with her. It stirred her anxiety and awakened the darker emotions that solitude invoked. And before she could help it, her heart recalled what could have been.

A late afternoon sun stretched over the village and bathed its buildings in a blanket of gold. Elsa was sitting at a plush upholstered window seat, chin introspectively perched on her hand, which sat motionless on the sill of the stained glass window. Gulls flew over the majestic fjord as Elsa mindlessly watched the boats scuttle about the port. So much time left so many places for her mind to wander.

"The fjord is beautiful this time of day, is it not, Your Grace?" The voice of Gerda pleasantly interrupting her thoughts.

"Mmmm. It is." An easy smile slipped across Elsa's lips as she turned towards the woman who felt more like a mother than a servant at times.

"Something troubling you?"

Elsa chucked and pulled her form back into its more regal posture, unparalleled grace in her every move. "Almost two years of working nonstop and catching up with my sister leaves me dumbfounded with all of this free time."

"Enjoy it," the elder woman urged. "The council has big plans to discuss at next week's meeting." Gerda gently patted Elsa on the shoulder and turned to carry on about her day when her hand was caught by another.

"Gerda, come keep me company?" The queen asked with a childlike lilt to her voice, eagerly tugging on Gerda's hand.

"Of course, Your Majesty." Gerda sat next to the queen and took in the view before flicking her eyes over to the reclusive monarch. "Are you missing Princess Anna?"

Elsa loved how Gerda's voice could be so soft and concerned, like a mother. Because she missed that terribly. "Yes," she sighed and adjusted herself to face Gerda a little better, thin legs spilling over the side of the seat. "The halls are so quiet without her. I imagine the sound of children will be filling them in no time. I'm really very happy for her."

The mirthful smile on Elsa's face lit up at the thought of future nieces and nephews, but her heart dropped when she remembered her own fate. How her little sister had already grown up and become a wife before Elsa had even had the chance to revisit romance. For eighteen years, she didn't worry about love or marriage, or who she'd have children with for that matter. But all of that had been replaced with becoming queen, leading a country, and reconnecting with her sister. All while healing from her less-than-perfect childhood. The past could never stay in the past, and it was catching up with Elsa faster than she could handle.

"Gerda, have you ever been in love?" She wasn't asking as the queen, and Gerda knew it. She was asking woman-to-woman, heartache apparent in Elsa's questioning sapphire eyes.

"A few times, Your Majesty. Do you have your eye on someone?" Lightening her tone.

"Hardly." The chance to playfully roll her eyes was delightfully refreshing for Elsa. "I've been so busy the past few years that love, _romantic_ love, hasn't been at the forefront of my mind. My sister is so enormously happy. I see the way she and Kristoff look at each other. And now that I have all this time to reflect, I realize how lonely I am." Her eyes drifted back out the fjord, staring at nothing in particular.

"Have you ever been in love, Your Majesty?" There was a long pause, and Gerda knew her question had struck a powerful chord when Elsa's throat bobbed and she grew very quiet.

"Once," she whispered, eyes glassier than the smooth waters of the fjord. "We would have been married by now. Probably even had a child, started a family. The one we always dreamed about. He was to be mine. And I, his."

The single tear that streamed down the queen's rosy cheek was all the confirmation Gerda needed to know about whom she was referring to. The woman had worked for the royal family for a very long time and was well aware of the betrothal. She did not know the extent of Elsa and Hans' feelings for each other, but it must have been a great love for Elsa to still be hurting after nearly five years. And everyone in the castle knew the events of the coronation and how he'd tried to kill her. Her heart ached for the suffering Elsa had endured for just a young 23-year-old. She'd lived a lifetime of pain already.

"You will love again," Gerda reassured and comfortingly patted Elsa's knee. It was all the affection she was permitted to show.

The queen shrugged, shaking off the dark thoughts her mind had traveled to and quirked her lips as she thought. "I don't know if it's _love_ I'm looking for. But companionship, someone of my own, would be nice." A warm smile graced her lips, and Gerda met it with one of her own. "And I want a family. I want to be a mother. Not just because I'm supposed to produce an heir, but because I really love children. I want someone to share that with. Share my life with."

"You are young and beautiful, and a powerful monarch. You could have any man you wish. You receive countless proposals. Kai hasn't felt that you're ready to read such things yet. But what you seek is out there."

Elsa cast her eyes back out to the heavenly view of her kingdom and carefully mused the idea of suitors. She didn't want a parade of men flocking to Arendelle, but Gerda was right. She needed to move on.

"Come," the woman said and rose to her feet, encouraging Elsa to follow her. The queen breathed a deep sigh, smiling more blithely, and followed Gerda's lead. "You should see all of the eligible princes the council has on file. Someone is ought to tickle your fancy."

Elsa laughed and blushed, but was excited nonetheless. Her happiness was out there. And instead of waiting for it to come to her, she was going to chase it down.

* * *

The queen had been right about tiny footsteps pitter-pattering down the royal halls of Arendelle Castle. A few months after returning from her honeymoon, Anna learned that she was pregnant. The aunt-to-be was so overjoyed that she changed her entire schedule in order to tend to her expecting sister.

She hadn't made it far through the stack of eligible hopefuls until it all felt forced, and Elsa got swept up in the arrival of a new baby, brushing romance to the side.

The day Kristian was born changed Elsa's life. Not only because her sister had produced the world's cutest prince but because she felt that unbelievable hold of love grip her with just one look into his dazzling teal eyes. He had light red hair, just like Anna, but it reminded everyone of the late king. Like a part of him was with them once again. She'd fallen in love with the baby over the past nine months but seeing and holding him for the first time ensured a special place in Elsa's heart.

Kristoff and Anna fawned over their darling baby boy, just a few weeks shy of their first anniversary. Elsa quietly left the birthing suite to give the new parents some bonding time with their new bundle of joy and went to prepare an official announcement, only to be met with the familiar pang of emptiness of her own private life.

As artificial and awkward as it was to select various matches through the help of her council, it was really the only way Elsa was going to meet anyone.

The potential men would come and visit for a week at a time, but Elsa never fancied any of them once they met in person. She was waiting for a sign or some kind of feeling to catalyze her ambitions, but it never happened. Her burning bush never materialized, much to her dismay.

That was until the first ever spring ball. It had been Anna's idea to celebrate the end of winter with a grand event to usher in the much-awaited warmth of spring. The waters were also passable at that time, and more guests were able to attend.

The young mother was certainly having the time of her life, dancing the night away with every partner in the room. Elsa smiled at her sister's delight from the banquet table, delicious food spanning its lengths, when Elsa saw him. They'd both reached for a canapé at the same time, and when the man caught sight of the powder blue sleeve made entirely of sparkling ice, he immediately knew to whom it belonged to.

"Your Majesty. By all means, please," placing the finely sliced piece of bread topped with a delectable swirl of creamy cheese into the queen's upturned hand.

Her eyes left the elegant morsel and gazed up at the tall figure before her. He was impeccably dressed in a navy blue uniform coat, royalty no doubt. His dark blonde hair streaked with natural hints of warm honey highlights and fair skin reminded Elsa of herself. He was not quite as pale but similar in tone, no freckles to be seen. The pleasant smile on his face was partially hidden by a well-groomed chevron mustache. A different style than her father had worn but evoked his memory nonetheless.

"I know you," Elsa simpered and slipped the canapé onto a napkin, forgetting it all together as she set it back on the table. "Prince Henrik, I presume?"

The man chuckled and straightened his spine before gracing the queen with a proper bow. "Of Nordmøre. How did you ever guess?"

"I know everyone in this room, and I've invited you to several events in the past. Yet you never showed because I was told you were traveling the world, as it would seem." She laid a keen eye on him, slightly annoyed by his many absences at her previous parties, but thoroughly intrigued by his clear blue eyes and charming demeanor.

"It's true," he shrugged and laughed nervously. "I love to travel. I think part of being a great leader is knowing what lies beyond your borders."

Elsa raised a single brow and swayed her weight from one hip to the other, hypnotizing the prince with the salacious swivel. "I hardly left my room for thirteen years, let alone my own country, so I can't say I agree, but I feel as though I'm no less of a servant to my people."

His grin grew wider, seemingly having underestimated the younger, but _very_ beautiful, monarch. "You speak your mind. Can't tell you how refreshing that is."

The initial tenseness between them faded into a more relaxed conversation. Elsa unconsciously batted her eyes, and her royal stance mellowed into something that reminded him more of a mystical nymph, revealing her gentler side.

"I'm told I do so too often, but it's in my nature," softening her features as she blushed slightly. She hadn't meant to flirt with him, but somehow they found themselves gazing into each other's eyes like two timid teenagers.

"Would you care to dance?" Henrik asked and gallantly held out his hand.

That moment that Elsa had been searching for, when she found someone to take an interest in, had at long last presented itself. And in an impressive fashion no less. Henrik was entirely different from the man Elsa had imagined, but there he was. Eagerly willing and waiting to lavish her with the attention she'd been pining for.

"I'd love to," she replied delightedly and accepted his hand with a rosy smile.

Anna had seen the whole thing from across the room, an unseemly collision of royal proportions that had her sister being led out to the dance floor with the biggest grin on her face.

Elsa and Henrik joined the other pairs for some of Arendelle's most cherished traditional folk dances, trying to blend in but failing miserably to do so due to their glowing faces. The speed and tempo were quick and lively, which was perfect for Elsa because she really wasn't ready for the kind of intimate contact a slower dance might have required. She had only just met Henrik and linked arms while skipping and twirling to an upbeat polka suited her just fine.

"Who is it that has stolen my sister's attention from me?" Anna jested playfully as she pulled Elsa aside once she and Henrik momentarily parted ways to rest their feet.

"You mean who did I find to have a conversation with while you sampled the dancing styles of every man in our alliance?" Elsa teased back and nudged her sister's arm.

"It's a party, Elsa," shoving a scrumptious chocolate truffle into her mouth. Even though Kristoff was off in the mountains, Anna didn't see why that meant she had to sit out on the biggest event of the season.

Modesty had befallen the queen, and she found herself shy in front of her very own sister about her recent find. "Prince Henrik of Nordmøre," shifting her eyes over to the dashing dark blonde and then back to Anna.

" _Ooooh_." Elsa hadn't simply found someone to chat with. She seemed to actually be _interested_ in this fellow.

"Oh what?" Crossing her willowy arms and raising a bemused brow to her cheeky younger sister.

"You know he's like ten years older than you?"

Elsa had to think about that for a moment but quickly brushed the age difference off. "I didn't, but what's wrong with that?"

"Nothing, I guess," trying not to judge or point out too strongly how much younger Elsa looked than Henrik. "Didn't see you as an older man type is all."

Elsa hadn't either, but suddenly she was defending it. "He's more mature."

"True," Anna agreed. "Do you love him?"

An undignified laugh tore from Elsa's throat, and she quickly covered her mouth with her hands to hide her embarrassment. " _Love_ him?" Rolling her eyes amusedly. "I just met him. Not all of us fall in love in a single evening, sweet sister."

Anna's face illuminated with glee, a glowing light bulb of sisterly joy as she bounced on the balls of her feet and squealed as quietly as she could. "I'm just excited. I want you to be happy. I haven't seen you dance with anyone like that in... ever."

It was a flat out lie that Elsa didn't dance. She merely chose not to in her earlier years for fear of harming others with her powers. Traditional dance and music was a part of her royal curriculum. And even though she'd danced at several events since her rise to power, what Anna meant was that she'd never seen Elsa dance with a man like Henrik and look so exceedingly happy while doing so.

"Didn't know I could actually dance _that_ well, did you?" The queen smirked, rubbing it in.

"I'm sad to say that there's still a lot I don't know about you. You're an endless sea of layers and depth. It may take me a lifetime to unravel the mystery that is my sister." The sentimental moment was bittersweet and the sisters smiled affectionately at each other as Elsa hugged Anna close to her.

"And we have all the time in the world to do so."

* * *

Later, Elsa joined her sister as she went to check in on baby Kristian in the nursery. Anna scooped the sleepy baby into her arms and gave him a tender kiss on his tiny forehead, having missed him so much during the ball.

Elsa brightened as she lovingly stroked her nephew's downy red hair. "He's so precious. An angel straight from heaven. You're so lucky."

Anna gave Kristian one last kiss and gently placed him back in his crib. "Elsa, you can have this too." Family, a husband. Happiness. She meant it all. "Just be open to it. You'll find the one."

* * *

When Elsa finally drifted off to sleep that night, she had a nightmare that shook her so badly she woke up in a frozen sweat gasping for air. Her body poured perspiration, but her fear solidified it. An odd phenomenon but easy cleaned with a simple wave of her hand. This time, she dreamt that she had given birth to her own baby. Bright strawberry blonde hair and piercing blue eyes were swaddled up in her arms.

"Beautiful," a voice had whispered, brushing a hand to her cheek as they leaned in to give her a kiss. When her eyes fluttered open, it was Hans, handsome and as charming as ever. His hand gently stroked the fine feathery hair of the baby's head, and he smiled with such joy.

"I love you," she whispered to him but suddenly felt a hand wrap around her slender throat. The face of a father in rapture turned wicked in the blink of an eye, and he squeezed tight, cutting off all air as Elsa struggled to pry him off of her.

"I love you, too, my princess."

That nightmare alone got Elsa to do some serious thinking. The sooner she moved on the better. A part of her was still hung up on Hans, or the idea of the two of them, and her brain would never come to understand how he could have loved her so much _and_ aimed to kill her in her darkest moment.

The next morning, she summoned Kai to request a long visit from the Prince of Nordmøre. There wasn't the magic spark she'd been hoping for, no destiny written in law. But the prince was a chance at a life she'd all but buried along with her past. That day she decided to move forward and never look back.

* * *

 _Have a lovely rest of your week C: If you're on social media and like what you're reading, please spread the word. I so don't care about the number of followers (I'm over having popular fics, they come with their own set of problems) but we're such a small ship that fics only seem to get around by word of mouth sometimes. I'm more interesting in giving Helsa shippers something good (hopefully) to read. And I'll do my best to respond to reviews this week! PS- I'm having a baby girl!_


	7. Royal Liasons

The next two months flew by with a growing baby and a blossoming relationship taking shape in the castle. Kristian was getting bigger by the minute, and Anna was fully consumed with being a hands-on mom. It was perfect timing because Elsa was in the midst of beginning an official courtship with Henrik (for Anna it had been about spending time with Kristoff, but Elsa required formal courtships). Henrik came as often as he could, sometimes staying a week at a time when his schedule allowed. As second in line to the throne of Nordmøre, he had some responsibilities but was committed to keeping a portion of his time available to travel, which didn't bother Elsa at first, but she was beginning to grow weary of his inability to give her a bigger commitment than he offered.

When Henrik _was_ in the kingdom, the two were settling into the rhythm of being a couple, an entirely new venture for Elsa, but not so for Henrik, who had a few courtships under his belt. None he was more excited about than Elsa, of course.

In the mornings, he greeted her outside her bedroom door with a cheery smile and offered his arm as they walked the lengths of the great halls to the dining room for breakfast. Anna always sat to Elsa's right, being her right in every way beyond the figurative meaning, and Henrik happily assumed the seat on her left.

During her meetings, he tended to his own work that had been couriered to him from Nordmøre. It helped that the neighboring kingdom was only a day's trip away by boat. And although things were starting to meld into a familiar rhythm, Elsa felt like she should be feeling more for Henrik after two months of this arrangement. Other than his stubbornness about traveling, there really wasn't anything wrong between the two of them. She thought about it after their first kiss, a quick peck that was over before it began because his mustache felt like frayed wire against Elsa's soft upper lip. After a few more attempts, she got used to the feeling but couldn't put her finger on why nothing ever felt like it had in the past.

Perhaps her previous experience with relationships was too greatly affected by her need to cling to Hans as an emotion life raft. They had bonded over their loneliness in the beginning. Or the fact that the peak of their connection had taken place during her teen years, puberty and hormones polluting her good sense of character. She also thought it might be her mind's, and heart's, way of protecting herself from feeling the crush of heartbreak like she had before. Opening herself up to someone and allowing her heart to trust against was something she figured was going to take more time than she initially expected.

There was nothing that signaled a mismatch to her. Appearance-wise, they looked fabulous together, both so well dressed with to-die-for beauty and sophisticated charm that no one could resist. They both had the best tutors in their youth and were able to carry on stimulating conversations and even teach each other a thing or two. Henrik had an incredibly sharp mind when it came to politics. Despite not liking his absence during his travels, Elsa loved to curl up on the sofa in front the hearth and listen to Henrik's adventures of places she'd only dreamed of going. Time, she told herself, was what she needed. A little more time to let herself fully commit to a pairing with Henrik. To let her heart emerge from the protective shell it had inhabited for far too long now.

Personal life aside, Elsa had been troubled with her council's concerns over their military. Even before Anna's wedding, Elsa had been trying to strengthen their defenses as best she could. In just over one year's time, she'd been able to restore the power and might of her ground troops, but the council was highly unnerved by the navy's lack of skill. Arendelle had been so peaceful during the last few reigns that none of the men had even seen any action and were entirely unprepared for the potential threats coming in from the outside world.

"Your Majesty, Arendelle sits just inside the North Sea. On a fjord no less. Our ground troops are superb now, thanks to your leadership, but it's our nautical defenses that need to be the apex of our military." The councilman furrowed his scraggly white brows as he gazed at the queen with a heavy expression.

"I completely agree, but we're running out of resources," she countered, calm and stoic as she sat at the head of the seemingly mile-long table.

"I think we've been delving too much into internal resources instead of tapping our most vital ones outside of the kingdom."

Elsa tilted her head to the elderly gentleman. "What do you propose?"

The man took in a slow and steady breath, side-eyeing the other members before bringing his laser-like attention back to the queen.

"The council proposes to bring in high ranking naval officers from neighboring kingdoms in order to bring our military up to the standard at which we need it."

The room grew silent, but Elsa's eyes lit up at the idea. "Nordmøre," she chirped blithely, as if she had read their minds. "It's perfect, and I can't believe I didn't think of it before."

Dozens of eyes anxiously skipped around as a low grumble began to bubble up from the far end of the table.

"No, Your Majesty. While Nordømore has an excellent navy, and we'd love to have any excuse to keep Prince Henrik here longer than his normal stays…" Elsa's lips tightened at the mere mention of her private life. She was a queen, yes, but she had a strict policy of keeping politics and courting as separate as possible. Engagements and weddings were public knowledge, but other matters were off limits to her council. Her pinched facial expression made the man hesitate for a moment but he continued. "We need the help of the strongest navy in the alliance. The Southern Isles."

The proposal didn't hit Elsa as hard as her council thought it would. They could tell she was slowly absorbing the idea but thankfully wasn't shocked. "Have we spoken to King Caleb about this?"

"Yes, Your Grace. He is prepared to send his best men to Arendelle for the entire summer if need be. This time of year would be an excellent opportunity to give our men the experience they need."

Elsa's shoulders bounced slightly as she smiled optimistically. That was an easier solution than she thought.

"That sounds like the best strategy then." Her jovial eyes were met with strained faces, and not a single person looked like they were about to adjourn the meeting. "Is there something more we need to discuss?" Her question drew out so long that it took an equal amount of time before anyone took the chance to respond.

"The commanding admiral that will be assisting our men… is Admiral Westergard."

"Oh," Elsa replied, wondering what all the build up had been for.

The man cleared his throat before clarifying. " _Hans_ Westergard, Ma'am."

Her porcelain features shattered like the very material itself, face screwing up in puzzlement. "How is Hans Westergard an admiral?" Razor sharp annoyance undercutting her tone.

"Two years ago, you gave King Caleb permission to let him serve his people through the navy."

"I'm aware of that, but how did he move up the ranks so quickly in two years?"

"There were a large amount of attacks on the North Sea this past year, precisely the reason why our military strength was called into question. Hans Westergard was the primary reason most of those battles were won and our kingdom was protected. Exactly the reason why we never cut ties with the Southern Isles. Despite what happened in the past, we _need_ them."

A delicate hand covered Elsa's mouth, and she chuckled in disbelief to herself. "I imagine having his brother as king didn't hurt his climb up the rankings as well." It was meant to be a private thought, but she accidently let it slip out.

"You would only be required to address the men as a group upon arrival. Our navy would be the liaison between you and the Southern Isles. No communication between you or Admiral Westergard is required, beyond what you're comfortable with."

The clash of personal and political turmoil was enough to drown Elsa in agony, but she refused to let the proposal get the better of her. She was a queen first, woman second. "I'll do what my kingdom requires of me. However, the less communication the better."

"Agreed," the council chimed in unison.

Elsa cast her gaze out and looked at her council with unwavering eyes, steady as a rock, and as confident as ever. "Then alert the staff to prepare for the arrival of the Southern Isles Navy. Makes sure we have adequate boarding and space in the harbor. Meeting adjourned."

The meeting had been so strenuous for Elsa, though she didn't let it show on the outside, that she left the room as soon as she'd dismissed the council and dashed off to find Henrik. The staff led her to where he was waiting in the garden with a spectacular set-up for afternoon tea.

"I thought lunch outside might be nice for a change." The prince grinned and held out his hands, gesturing to the beautiful spring bloom of wild flowers scattered across the lush garden. Elsa heaved out a breath, relieved for the sudden change of mood, and ran into his arms, something she hadn't exactly done before, and the action surprised them both. Henrik was so flabbergasted that he didn't lower his arms right away, just letting them hang weightless above Elsa's slender body like her sudden outpouring of affection had paralyzed him with glee.

"Everything all right?" He asked, finally wrapping his arms around her in a moment he considered pure triumph. Henrik always went at Elsa's pace, but he had been holding himself back quite a lot since he'd met her. He desperately wanted to hold her. Touch her. Even kiss her much more than they did already, but Elsa only offered sporadic opportunities to do so.

Elsa hummed as Henrik's fingers danced along the ridges of her braid, soaking in his tenderness. "I'm fine," she muffled into this coat, head buried into his chest as she let the memories of the past that were pounding at a mental door slip away at the feeling of Henrik's safe embrace.

They hugged for a while, and when Elsa stepped back and collected herself, Henrik frowned.

" _Fine_? You're… orange. Or marigold? What does orange mean?" Gazing down at the normally teal dress that now looked like it had its own sunrise radiating out from the center of the bodice. The changing of her dresses' colors was something that had happened just a year ago. Her powers had become so intertwined with her emotions that the ice she made and the ice she wore now reflected it.

"Um…" Elsa stalled, grasping for an excuse. "I had some issues to deal with in the meeting that I wasn't expecting, that's all. But everything is fine. And this lunch looks… beyond perfection." Her eyes fluttered in time with her heart as she feasted her them on the elegant three-tiered stand overflowing with finger sandwiches and pastel petit fours that looked like tiny wrapped gifts. It was the most breathtaking high tea she'd ever experienced, even as queen.

"Then come," pulling out a chair for her with an ear-to-ear grin. "Let me take your mind away from all your troubles before you dive back in for more."

Sleep evaded the young queen that night. The closer to the arrival date of the Southern Isles Navy, the more nightmares Elsa had, and the more frozen nightgowns she woke up silently screaming in. It got so back that the night before their arrival, she ended up sleeping in Anna's room while Kristoff was away.

* * *

The morning the flag of the Southern Isles could be seen docked in her harbor, Elsa was trapped at her mirror. A full-length rosemaling-trimmed reflection of her frightened self stared back at her, fear swarming her pale blue eyes. Blood red had begun to creep up like billowing smoke from the bottom of her dress, anxiety and emotion overriding the majestic blue of the magical garment as she squeezed her eyes shut and tried to shake her dumbfounded head.

 _Why am I afraid?_

If anyone should have been nervous, it shouldn't have been her. This was _her_ castle, _her_ kingdom, and _she_ was the reigning queen. She wasn't a timid little eighteen-year-old still bound by white gloves and wishing for her first real kiss anymore. Before her was the image of a powerful queen, commander of all that the eye could see from outside her window, with the incredible gift to conjure ice and snow. And she was _with_ someone else now. The crippling fear of being lonely forever and never recapturing what she once had wasn't real anymore. It was strange because, if anything, this odd turn of events was making her feel more strongly towards Henrik.

 _I can do this._

 _I can do this._

Elsa swiftly made her way down the grand spiral staircase and down the hall to the council chambers, relieved to see that her dress had resumed its normal glacier hue. The highest ranking officers from both navies were already gathered inside and waiting. Kai tactfully met Elsa outside and made a formal announcement of her presence before she entered in the grandest of fashion, chin held high and shoulders pinned back. A swan gliding across a pond with the fierceness of a lion.

"Queen Elsa of Arendelle," resounded through every beam and rafter of the massive room. _Her_ room. A sly smirk teased the corner of Elsa's mouth, hoping Hans was intimidated by every single syllable of Kai's booming announcement.

The last time they'd been in the same room together, Hans had been a prince. He was immediately stripped of that title as part of his punishment and now stood before her as a simple admiral. A decorated one with the medals to prove it, but Elsa swatted that irritating reminder away before standing at the head of the table. Standing because she didn't plan on staying long, but she also wanted to tower over the room and make her dominance known. Small psychological tricks like these were what her father had been sure to instill in his little princess, and now she was the full embodiment of his legacy.

Her heels clicked together as she narrowed her gaze on a painting of Arendelle's mighty fjord at the back of the room, making sure not to focus too long on any one person so that she didn't accidentally lock eyes with a certain redhead.

"Gentlemen," she began in an imperious voice. "Allow me to formally welcome you to Arendelle and thank you for your services. We are allies for a reason, and I know that you carry that proud military tradition the Southern Isles prides itself on, with you. I'm truly honored by your presence. I hope that you will find your stay comfortable, and please do not hesitate to alert the staff if you need anything additional. Again, thank you, and I look forward to the great work that will be done over the summer." With a nod of her head and a swift smile, Elsa turned and strode out before her heart had a chance to catch up with her mind.

As soon as the door closed behind her, Elsa slumped against the wall, head hitting it with a dull thud as Kai proudly patted her on the arm. He knew what kind of guts it took to walk into a room full of men that included one she'd been engaged to for eighteen years and tried to kill her and take her crown. Something her father never had to deal with.

The council took it upon themselves to bring the navy up to speed of the situation and laid out their expectations for the following three months. By the time it was over, Elsa had already buried herself in paperwork up in her office and extended study. Her quill scratched along the paper as she tried to ignore the growing callous on her middle finger. Too many days and nights of treaties and reforms had taken its toll on the thin digit.

"Your Majesty," Kai called from the other side of the door, the only door that was closed during the daytime because Elsa just couldn't get any work done otherwise.

"Yes," she replied without lifting her head or breaking the quill's fluid stride.

"Admiral Westergard wishes to speak with you briefly."

The perfect loops and curls of her handwriting ended with jagged line that Elsa would have to fix later. The sound of heels clopping to the door made Kai jump back as she opened the door and gently yanked the portly man into the room.

"They said no extra communication," she whispered in a panic.

"You don't have to see him. He's just requesting your time. You _can_ say no," he reminded calmly.

Elsa's tired hands were already wringing together, and she tortured her bottom lip between her teeth. "Is he outside?" Eyes motioned to the door, voice still low enough so that only Kai could hear.

"Yes."

"Kai!" She scolded, in a loving way if there was such a thing.

"I'll tell him you're busy."

That would have been perfect, except that Hans was going to be in her kingdom for an entire summer. She didn't have three months of excuses up her sleeve, and judging by the first morning alone, she wasn't going to have the emotional stamina to avoid him for that long.

"No," she said more confidently, dropping her hands and smoothing out her dress in an effort to compose herself, the teal hue swallowed up by a dark yellow. "I don't want to spend next three months walking on eggshells in my own home and kingdom. Let's just get this over with. But give me a minute."

Kai nodded and left Elsa as she waltzed back to sit behind her desk, wanting to make it appear like Hans had interrupted her atrociously busy schedule as much as possible. She'd faced him during the coronation and in a jail cell donning shackles; she could face him now, rubbing her wrists as she thought back to that day in dungeon. It was a bad and terrible habit, but she pushed all feeling down to the pit of her stomach with a thick swallow, until she was numb and couldn't feel a thing except for the aching throb of her wretched finger.

A knock at the door and Kai was announcing Admiral Westergard when Hans walked into the room and back into her life. Elsa's body stiffened like a cadaver in her own office. She hadn't seen more than a blur of Hans in the council chambers, but it took every ounce of strength she had not to let the sting in her heart take over her senses. It was agony to hold it all together, and neither of them had even spoken to each other yet.

His hair was exactly the same, beautiful and glowing with flaming streaks of fiery red. His signature tall black boots knocked against the solid pine floor as the man she hadn't seen since the Great Thaw slowly approached her desk. He looked older, not as old as Henrik, but older than someone Hans' age should have appeared. She surmised it had something to do with so much time spent outdoors and working in such poor conditions. And while in Caleb's letters it might have given her some satisfaction to know that he was suffering, it didn't give her the same feeling in person.

"Your Majesty," he said, voice hitting her like landslide as her heart tried to maintain a stable rhythm. The room was loaded with twenty-four years of memories, all of which seemed to be silently floating between them like tombstones of that past.

"What can I do for you, Admiral?" It was just like the coronation, two people mechanically going through the motions of a scripted meeting. Only Hans wasn't a plastic version of himself like when he and her sister had skipped into the throne room and asked her to bless their preposterous marriage. His face was honest, and panged with heavy remorse. Held together nicely by the unbelievable uniform he was wearing. Gone were his princely garbs, but they'd been replaced with a long black admiral's coat that tapered out to the sides and fell around the back of his knees, lined with the decorated floral pattern of the Southern Isles. He had been demoted to admiral, but he looked incredibly well put together. Enough to make her breath seize for a few seconds as she studied him.

"Are we going to do this again?" He asked bluntly, causing Elsa to shake her head as they broke the expected prattle.

"I beg your pardon?" Eyes shooting wider than a super moon.

"I came here because I can't bear the idea of making you uncomfortable for months on end."

"I had the same thought just as you came to my door."

Her hardened veneer faded as she stepped out from behind her desk, heart settling within her ribcage, finally. She perched herself at the edge of the thick wooden ledge, fingers holding up her slight frame, and she slid to lean against the front with Hans just a few feet away from her.

With Elsa so close, he could see the real-life version of the image that had been stuck in his head for almost three years. The memory of a snow queen unconscious in his arms, covered in dazzling ice with a braid as long as the day. She looked even more beautiful in person, and he couldn't help but let his eyes rove over the crystallized neckline of her tight-fitting dress. The intricate webbing of the mesh-like mantel captivated his attention. How she'd been able to create such brilliance, he'd never know. Her pale skin was as flawless as he remembered, and even though it had been three long years, she didn't look that much older. More womanly, losing the last remainder of gangliness left over from adolescence, and looking more comfortable in the body positioned just in front of him.

"I hope it's my dress you're admiring, _Admiral_ ," finding his gaze after it left what appeared to be her chest.

"It's yellow," pointing to the canary hue enveloping the bodice and skirt. "I remember it being a different color is all." That hadn't been the entire reason his eyes wandered down there, but it was still very much the truth in addition to his valiant attempt to placate her.

"It changes now. The color reflects my emotion."

"I noticed that in your ice castle. Yellows, reds, browns. Like it was a part of you, or connected to you. What does yellow mean?"

"Caution," the word hitting him harshly. "I don't trust you." Hans' lips pulled into a frown at the reminder of the animosity still very much alive between them. As if a day hadn't passed since the Great Thaw.

"In all honesty, I came here to talk to you. About what happened. To explain. Because I can see the hate you have for me in your eyes. I've been burned and blistered under the scorching summer sun. Stunk to high heaven from manure. Suffered injury and illness. But none of those punishments ever affected me like what I see when you look at me."

He was vulnerable. He'd come to lay his heart out for her and, completely against her character, Elsa took advantage of it for her own pleasure. Because she was still hurting deep down inside.

She adjusted herself against the desk, back slightly arching and hips shifting enough to flaunt herself. Her gaze was downcast to the floor as she licked her lips and flicked her oceanic eyes back to him, fluttering lashes reaching out and demanding his attention. She knew how to make it hurt for him.

"You miss me?" She husked, making her flirtation anything but a secret.

"More than I care to admit."

"Elaborate," she demanded coyly, lips and tongue wrapping around the words so gorgeously that he had to bite the inside of his cheek. "You've oggled my dress. It's the least you could do."

"I'm honestly just curious as to why you need a slit so high, and why your leg is jutted out as such," lowering his eyes to the alabaster calf and peek of wintery thigh exposed to the room.

"I have to move quickly sometimes. It's more out of necessity than _viewing_ pleasure. Now answer my question. Do you miss me?"

His jaw tightened and he looked at her earnestly. "Yes, I miss you."

"You think about me? Out at sea?"

"I do. I also thought about you every time my hands bled from digging ditches. My pain is for you." A strange feeling took over Hans, and he knew something about her behavior was too good to be true, but he couldn't hold himself back. He boldly took a step forward, a large enough step so that he was a breath away from her, making her quietly gasp. "I think about you all the time. My heart refuses to let you go. Though I beg it to."

Elsa remained silent, letting the sexual tension build like a bonfire between them as she peered up at him through her thick lashes. It was amazing how they could evoke such an erotic anger and sadness in each other. No matter how much she told herself that she hated him or how she wanted to see him burn for what he'd done to her, he still lit her fuse like a firecracker. Sizzling with want and sparking to life.

Hans brazened himself and brushed a hand against her cheek. No more gloves. Just his bare skin against hers. "Tell me," he whispered softly, breath rushing warm against her icy skin. "Has anyone else had the pleasure of gracing your lips since I last did?" The old line almost made her cave, her mind screaming as it flashed back to the night in the library where he'd kissed her for the first time. Hans always counted that as their second kiss, but Elsa considered it her first _real_ kiss as a woman.

She let herself give into the temptation to drive him over the edge, sharpening her knife as she went for the kill and shutting out the guilt that tugged at her soul.

"A number of men have graced much more than my lips... including my body, since you."

If she was going for soul-crushing, she achieved it based on the defeated look stifling the life in Hans' eyes. She wasn't a virgin anymore. She wasn't his white bride, meant only for him. He'd never be the first to show her the physical pleasure of his love like they'd planned. Someone else had beaten him to it long ago. He couldn't blame her. According to what Elsa knew, she had every right to villainize him and direct her affection towards someone else. Someone who hadn't tried to end her life.

"I need to talk to you about the coronation," he pressed urgently. "You don't know everything."

"And you've come here to tell me this? To ask for my forgiveness?" She was almost mocking him now as he held onto whatever shred of hope he had left.

"In part."

"That is _not_ why I've brought you here." Her tone turned colder than the ice on her dress, steel in her gaze as she blazed back behind her desk and unfolded a map with haste. Her emotions getting the better of her. " _This_ is your job. _My_ navy. In case you have forgotten, _Admiral_."

"Elsa, I just want to explain-"

"I'll beg to address me formally," the queen snapped, voice dangerously low as ice crackled onto the edges of the weathered map. "Do not forget that _I_ am the ruler of this land, and you are a mere guest." She cast him a withering look, and Hans relented to its piercing sting, stepping away from the desk to create some distance.

"Yes, Your Majesty."

She was at her breaking point. Too many thoughts and memories were fighting for her attention, and she hated herself for feeling any want for him at all. The struggle between content and longing was miserable.

"We are done here."

Hans nodded dutifully and bent at the waist, bowing to her with more respect than he'd ever shown anyone before, eyes leaving her wilting frame for only a beat as he turned towards the door. "Elsa," stopping at the threshold. "You're not this cruel. I deserve it, tenfold. But don't do this to yourself. I promise you'll think differently if you listen to what I have to say."

Tears built up in her eyes so furiously that she had to avert her gaze from him, though her voice hid nothing. Telegraphing just how much his return had affected her as the brilliant yellow dress turned a morose navy blue. "I said we are done."

* * *

 _So... Hans is back! Hope you all enjoyed the update and have a splendid Labor Day weekend, if you're in the states. Thank you to my beta let-it-geaux._

 _Crash Into Me readers, update is next week. Possibly sooner, we'll see :)_

 _Helsa Files is also updating next week with part 3/4 for On the Trikk. Check it out if you haven't already._


	8. Breath of Life

_Thank you to my beta Let-it-geaux, who edited this despite being sick this week. What a trooper._

* * *

Two long weeks passed, and even though Hans and Elsa had gotten their confrontation out of the way to avoid any awkwardness, they ended up hiding from each other anyway. He'd jumped the gun on their meeting, underestimating her reaction, and let his emotions get the better of him once he saw her. In turn, Elsa did the same once she saw him. They both seemed to understand their behavior a little better after some reflection, but it left them feeling unsure about how to proceed from their jarring and emotional first reunion.

Hans' crew was being housed in a separate wing of the castle, so that made it easy as they entered and exited from different directions. However, they'd still managed to run into each other on two occasions.

The first was while Hans was in the village on his way to a tavern one evening as Anna and Elsa came skipping out of a bakery with warm sweet rolls in their hands. Anna licked the stickiness from her gooey fingers while Hans waved apathetically to a flustered Elsa. Both women ended up responding by making a sharp right and heading back towards the castle at a fervid pace.

The second encounter was a more poignant one. Hans had just been dismissed from a meeting with Arendelle's naval officers and wanted to take a peek at the garden he remembered so fondly. Only when he came to a corridor in the lower hallways, he spied Elsa with her hands fondly cupped around another man's face as she gingerly kissed him, flames furiously licking the sides of Hans' face as he surreptitiously watched them from around the corner.

He felt like an idiot. He actually thought that, after six years, Elsa would still be a lone ruler, wistfully waiting at her window for him to appear across the fjord or some ridiculous nonsense that obviously wasn't the truth.

"Who was that I saw with the Queen," Hans demanded of one of Arendelle's captains as they strolled along the docks of the harbor the following day.

The older man chuckled lightly. "The Queen demands privacy. She thinks none of us have caught on, but we've all noticed Prince Henrik's _extended_ visits. She's not fooling anyone," raising his implicative brows to the admiral.

"Are they courting?" The question made bile rise at the back of Hans' throat.

"I suppose you could call it that," the captain replied with a shrug. "I've never seen them beyond what I've witnessed at the occasional festival or ball, but they seem to be quite a pair."

Hans scoffed rudely, taking zero effort to hide his bitterness, and thought the whole thing ridiculous. "He's _older_ than her," slowly launching an attack on their bemusing courtship.

"A decade is nothing out of the ordinary. My own wife is seven years my junior."

 _Wife_. The word hit Hans like a bullet, emotional shrapnel to his delicate heart, because that was what Elsa was supposed have been to him. He was only two years older than her. Everything had been so perfect until her parents died and his father went ballistic with paranoia.

He went to bed that night trying to block the image of the royal couple from disturbing his slumber, but it was no use. The harder he tried, the more intrusive the visual was of Elsa's rose red lips pressed against that pretentious mustache.

The only solace he found in having witnessed such a gut-wrenching scene was that there hadn't been much passion. Obviously Elsa had put some meaning behind her kiss. But Hans knew what she was capable of and could pull from those wonderful memories of his own breathtaking kisses with Elsa.

He hadn't been intimate with her in six years, but when their lips had met, her whole body had relaxed into his. Her lips had parted before she could even think, and there had been a cosmic melody to the way they touched each other. Even at a time when Elsa had to contend with the secret of her powers, she had allowed herself to be vulnerable with him. Her breath had shuddered and she had sighed ever so lightly into his mouth. Far more passionate than the tight-lipped exchange he'd seen in the hallways.

The thought of Elsa back in her youth helped him drift off to sleep. Remembering her adorable blue jacket and braided bun soothed him like a warm blanket. She'd been so innocent back then, and a smile touched his lips when he thought about how many nights Elsa must have gone to sleep back then thinking about him the way her was her. No matter what happened, no one could ever take that away from him. Even if Elsa never spoke to him again, he would have those eighteen years where she was his. When she'd dreamed of being his wife and starting a life together. He would have those wonderful thoughts tucked safely in his pocket for the rest of his days.

* * *

Another gorgeous sunrise dawned over the fjord, and Henrik was right at Elsa's door like he was every morning. Only this time, she greeted him with a somber smile and clung to his arm a little tighter as they walked down to breakfast without much conversation.

Once at the table, an instant glee swept over Elsa's features, brighten them, when she laid her eyes on the sweet young prince waiting for her with a toothless grin.

"Good morning, my ray of sunshine!" Elsa cooed to a gurgling Kristian as he happily bounced in Anna's lap with an energy that rivaled his mother's. The queen couldn't resist the urge to get a bubbling laugh out of her nephew and unfolded her napkin to hide behind it, playfully beaming behind the finely pressed linen in a way that always reminded Anna of the sister she knew before their separation.

"Wheeeeeeere's Auntie Elsaaaa?!" She sing-songed mirthfully, getting a rumble of laughter from the table and staff. "Where am I, Kristian?" The baby's big teal eyes rapidly shifted back and forth, baffled by how he was able to hear and not see his mischievous auntie. Henrik observed the precious scene and grinned as Elsa anxiously ran her tongue over her teeth, giving her game the right amount of time before she surprised Kristian. "Peek-a-boo!" She burst at the sound of a squealing giggle, the reward she'd been waiting for.

Elsa quickly ducked down and popped up like a jack-in-the-box a few more times, getting Kristian to giggle even louder, so hard that he could barely catch his breath, before breakfast was served, and Anna reluctantly handed him off to one of the nannies to hold him while she ate a much-needed breakfast. Meals were the only time Anna let any of the help actually _help_ her because she just couldn't bear to turn her baby over to anyone else besides Kristoff or Elsa.

"Why are you two so quiet?" Anna asked through a mouthful of pastry and waggled her fork between Elsa and Henrik. The only reply she got was the awkward glance the couple gave each other and the doleful sigh that escaped from Elsa. "Oh…" Anna suddenly remembered. "Today's the big departure day. Where are you off to this time, Henrik?"

The man scratched his chin nervously, sensing Anna's scrutiny. "Italy and Greece. I plan to bring Elsa back something amazing."

"Like yourself?" The fiery redhead muttered under her breath.

"Anna!" Elsa chided quietly and nudged her foot under the table.

"I'm sorry, Henrik. I just think the best gift you could give my sister is your company, by not even leaving at all. My husband leaves because he has a job, and I miss him terribly when he's gone. You leave for pleasure while Elsa sits here pining in misery for your return. But by all means," shooing him with her overly animated hands. "Buy her a pretty vase or whatever gift you think will make up for that. I'm sure she'll tell you she loves it anyways."

Mortified and tomato-red, Elsa pressed a hand to her forehead, attempting to shield herself from the burn of embarrassment blazing over her reddening features.

"I'm sorry," Elsa mouthed to Henrik. Though she didn't disagree with Anna at all, she just would have preferred to have gone about in a much more delicate manner.

After a rather tumultuous breakfast, Elsa reluctantly escorted Henrik down to where his ship was being loaded with his belongings, ready for a trip back to Nørdmore to pick up some of his brothers before sailing off to the Mediterranean.

With everything onboard, Henrik turned to her and tucked a strand of loose blonde back behind her ear, a little bit of guilt hiding beneath his smile. "I'll miss you. Despite what your sister thinks."

Wild magenta swept across Elsa's cheeks again as her eyes flicked away momentarily before shrugging, almost not knowing what to say. "She's just… outspoken. I'll miss you, but I do hope you have a wonderful time." The conversation was as proper as could be, straight out of an etiquette book with neither one really revealing their true feelings.

Henrik gave Elsa a small hug, and she returned it with a brief kiss, anything more would have made her ask him not to leave and that was a useless battle.

She stood somberly at the edge of the dock as Henrik's ship pulled away from the slip in the harbor, surprised to find Hans watching her from the towering deck of his own vessel. The day just couldn't get any more uncomfortable.

* * *

Boredom began to take over Elsa's days, and she eventually decided to throw her extra time and energy in something that would benefit everyone, including herself. A small gathering was planned for the visiting navy to brighten their spirits during their long stay in Arendelle. A small gathering that turned into what Elsa later officially deemed the Midsummer's Ball. It wasn't even the middle of summer yet, but she enjoyed any excuse to throw a lavish party instead of wasting her time waiting for Henrik to return. He probably wasn't doing the same, tromping around the Acropolis with his band of brothers, so neither should she.

Hans readied himself for the ball with meticulous detail and wore his finest admiral's uniform, promising himself that he would keep a fair distance away from Elsa and let her come to him if she so wished.

The night began with everyone gathered in the castle courtyard for a spectacular display of Elsa's magic. In the first days after the Great Thaw, she was able to repeat some of the magic she'd showed Anna as a child. With each passing year, her powers became stronger, exactly as her parents had noticed when she was a small child.

Her ice castle would always be the pinnacle of her creative skills, but on this night, she gave her guests a show they would never forget. Anna described it as a fireworks show made of ice, but it was so much more than that.

"Are you ready?!" Elsa called in her traditional fashion to the cheering crowd.

With a stomp of her masterfully crafted summer ice heel, glowing blue lights shot under the crowd's feet and danced around the walls of the castle to adorn them in her icy majesty. And that was just the beginning.

Two hands moved deftly through the warm night air as Elsa conducted an orchestra of frosty fireworks, bright bursts of glittering ice filling the evening skies of Arendelle.

Each explosion was a different shape than the last. Some were giant snowflakes, perfect geometric precision only the queen and Mother Nature could achieve. Others erupted more slowly and drizzled down to the water of the fjord like a sparkling curtain of winter wonder made purely from diamonds.

Elsa's eyes widened to their whites with elation, the thrill of her unbound magic setting her soul ablaze as she turned the starry sky into her canvas, filling it with a sight no one in the world had ever seen.

From the corner of the courtyard stood Hans, alone with a jovial feeling of amazement and heavy bitter regret. His eyes were glued to the extraordinary scene stealing his every breath. It was a celebration of her powers, of who Elsa _really_ was at the core, and not just simply as queen. She was something special, a mythical amalgamation of nature, magic, and spellbinding beauty the world had never known.

Hans' heart sank into his stomach as the crowd cheered on, knowing his father had been so wrong about Elsa. The woman he feared would enslave every realm on Earth was using those mighty powers to entertain her people, not control them with fear. She was the furthest thing from evil Hans could imagine. The plan, the coronation. Everything his father had put him through had been in vain. The pain and torment he'd endured wasn't the ultimate price he'd paid. It was losing Elsa. And it had never struck him more profoundly than it did it that courtyard.

Despite his somber mood, Hans couldn't hold back the broad smile that keep tugging at the corner of his mouth. Elsa was having such a great time letting her powers and personality shine, and he'd never seen her so happy. Well he could think of at least one other time he'd seen her extremely happy, but this was above and beyond anything he'd seen in person.

That also hurt because Hans realized that she'd learned to be happy without him over the years. All he was now was a source of bittersweet memories and broken promises. He thought he'd found his place out at sea, mind quiet amongst the rolling white-capped waves. But he suddenly didn't feel complete. Something was missing, and he was looking right at her as she dipped into a graceful curtsy in front of the crowd and began to lead them inside the ballroom.

Once inside the all-too-familiar hall, Hans decided to lay low by the punch bowl and chat with the other officers that straggled by, his eyes always disobediently drifting away to Elsa like a magnet to its mate, but never putting any pressure on her to notice his presence in return.

Gone was her wintery dress and in its place was a spectacular short-sleeved green gown with bright pink starflowers plastered to her ethereal cape. A summer dress made of winter. He loved the irony. It suited her well.

Elsa had worn that particular version of her ice dress for almost two summers now, but it was the first time Hans had ever seen it. It was also the first time he'd seen her hair down as well, which was something she'd only started doing recently. It was still iced back on top with a purple star clip on the right side of her head. But the rest hung down like a waterfall of champagne that made him grasp his flute a little too hard, threatening to shatter it from the way her beauty still managed to bewitch him into a stupor. She was so irresistibly beautiful with all this vibrant novelty to which he had to acclimate himself.

Elsa spent the evening getting to know each of the visiting members of the navy, and eventually she needed some refreshment after doing so much talking. She'd spied Hans playing wallflower over by the food and meandered over to the punch bowl hoping he wouldn't notice her.

"Your Majesty," Hans nodded respectfully and turned his attention back to the dance floor where a circle dance was taking place. Kristoff was in town, and he and Anna were burning up the room with their fancy moves and carefree joviality.

"Admiral," the Queen greeted in return. Elsa forgot all about her thirst as she brought her hands together at her waist and fretted over what to say.

Hans noticed her fidgeting and was saddened by how his mere presence affected her so greatly. "You don't have to talk to me. It's fine," he said politely, keeping his eyes on the lively party and releasing Elsa of some of her anxiety, which was quickly replaced by self-inflicted guilt.

He'd opened himself up to her so quickly that first day back, and it had been her doing. She had taken advantage of the situation in order to seek a sliver of revenge on him and was only left feeling terrible about the awful way she'd left things between them. She was a queen and a more respectable person than she had been in her office that day. Raw emotions and exposed scars were unavoidable, but perhaps a bit of mending would get them off on the right foot. And she felt that she owed him that, if anything at all.

The wringing of her hands ceased, and they fluidly fell to her sides, mellowing as she peered up at him with a calm guise that was difficult to ignore.

"Is that what you want?" Stepping in front of him so that he could only see her, unwavering and softer in her approach. Those blue eyes catching his green with what he read as a renewed earnestness.

He dropped his gaze to her and tried not to notice how beautiful she was in her new gown. From this distance, he could see the tiny crystals of ice nuzzled in her golden locks. Why did she have to get more stunning every time he saw her?

"I want you to be happy."

"My captains report that you've been teaching them a lot. I'd be lying if I didn't say that made me happy." A smidgen of a smile played across her petal-pink lips. She was genuinely happy for the improvements Hans was making to her navy, but she was also satisfied with the amiability they had been able to reach thus far.

"Glad to hear that." Elsa didn't move and brushed a section of her lengthy mane over her shoulder, finding herself again tongue-tied. "Your dress is very nice by the way."

Her smile grew wider, though she tried to bite it back, flirtation getting the better of her as they settled back into their familiar banter. A habit after having known each other for so long.

"Flattering me?" She playfully accused, restrained and not overly done.

"Merely trying to negotiate a cease fire." She could always count on him to speak the truth.

"What do you propose?" Sounding intrigued with a raise of her brow.

"Will you dance with me? For old time's sake?"

Her lips pursed, and she crossed her arms over herself, but in a confident and almost sassy manner. "That sounds like a dangerous proposition."

And then he leveled with her. "Elsa, you were my fiancée for eighteen years. That doesn't just go away."

Her arms relaxed, coy crisscross slipping into a kind of self-hug as the sass disappeared from her weighty tone. "That was a different time. And so much has happened since."

Hans straightened his spine and rolled his shoulders back until he almost looked like an erected statue in that fetching black uniform. "Then as Admiral to Queen. May we celebrate the joining of our defenses to create a stronger alliance?"

She liked the previous proposal better, but at least this felt safer.

"Then, as Queen, yes."

Hans offered her his hand, golden cuffs glimmering under the brightly lit room, and Elsa formally accepted it with a hearty smile. They were as professional as could be, fooling no one but themselves.

The romp of a circle dance came to a close as the two approached the floor, surprised when the music changed to a slower dance. They took the change in stride and assumed a respectable hold, Hans giving Elsa the space she needed in order to feel comfortable. The tickle of a flute began the minuet, and Hans led Elsa into the first turn of the dance.

As her hand rested on the sleek plane of his epaulettes, she let herself appreciate the man he'd grown into. That handful of freckles still speckled his cheeks, but he exuded the overwhelming aura of a man, and now a distinguished admiral. All he had to do was touch her before she began to unravel faster than a loose spool of thread spinning out of control, muscle memory and childhood hopes sparking to life as they glided across the floor they'd been brought together on so many times before. First as small children, and now as queen and admiral.

It didn't take long before their hold relaxed, his hand falling away from her waist and more towards her hip. Elsa unintentionally began to tighten the distance between them, her pale hand trailing down from his shoulder to rest on his chest, and the past began to get the better of them. His hands on her body, holding her with such strength, brought her back to the last time he'd done so. As they swayed to the beat, part of Elsa's mind was back in the library with Hans. A young girl, no more than 18 years old, with the hands of her prince and future husband lovingly wrapped around her waist, lips pressed to hers in a passionate kiss.

"Look at my sister," Anna gasped as she nearly spit out her drink at the sight of Hans waltzing with Elsa, perfect timing and all.

Kristoff laughed and leaned in to whisper to his wife. "They kind of look like a couple."

"That's absurd!" Waving him off.

"Well, look at his hands. That's not how you maintain hold with a queen."

Anna squinted her eyes and took a second look. Sure enough, they were dancing much closer than anyone had ever danced with Elsa, Henrik included. "He's taking advantage of her!"

Kristoff took a sip from his glass and chuckled. "I think she's okay with it. Look at her eyes. She leans in any closer, and she might kiss him."

Although Kristoff appeared to be correct, Anna refused to believe it. "I'm cutting you off from the champagne."

Hans' heart pounded wildly as they continued to dance, aching and yearning to break the uncomfortable barrier that had formed between them since he first arrived.

Sapphire eyes squeezed shut as Elsa tried to stop the image of them dancing on their wedding day from entering her mind, but she failed. Their first dance had been something she'd played out in her daydreams for years. It was much too difficult to repress something like that.

It would have been more loving, but the heat that he invoked with his touch so close against her body would have been the same.

"Are you alright?," Hans asked, worried that maybe all the spinning and champagne were starting to get to her.

"Fine. I'm fine." Lying because she was anything but. The part of herself that was so angry with him kept getting overridden by the formidable strength of seeing him in person. She remembered the man that had come to her coronation and what he'd done to her and her sister. She could also never forget the young man she'd grown up with from a distance and had given her heart to. Their history and the way he could command her passion without even trying was a battle she found herself submitting to more often these days.

Earlier in the evening, Hans had fallen in love with her powers in a whole new way. Now he was falling for the woman Elsa had become in their time apart. He noted the difference in how her body felt in his hold, more curvaceous and womanly than when she was younger. Her dress was cold but smooth to the touch, like icy silk that she filled out wonderfully.

Eventually the heat became too much for Elsa to stand, and she feared where her thoughts may take her if they remained this close together. Loving who'd he'd been didn't mean she had forgiven him. The pull of wanting and hating him was a dangerous place she couldn't stand to be in any longer.

"I'm sorry; please excuse me," Elsa blurted as she abruptly broke their hold and gathered her skirt to leave the floor. She marched passed Anna, politely claiming she wasn't feeling well, and bolted for the privacy of her room.

Hans wasn't sure exactly what had happened but he knew better than to go after her. He gathered he'd triggered some sort of strong feelings, of hate or forgotten love, he wasn't sure. But he decided it was probably better if he didn't provoke the situation further.

* * *

A few days later, Elsa had reclaimed her composure enough to watch her navy try out the new ship she'd commissioned from the Southern Isles and perform a few exercises out on the fjord.

It was a blustery day, gray clouds blocking out the beloved summer sun, but it didn't stop Hans from doing his job like the fine sailor he was. He spent some time showing the men around the new vessel, claiming it would be fastest ship in Arendelle's fleet and owing it all to their queen, who spent countless nights trying to balance the military budget to afford it.

It was a beautiful ship, crafted by the finest builders in all of the Southern Isles. Yet it paled in comparison to the admiral perched stoically onboard.

The ship pulled out into the deepest part of the fjord as Hans stood proudly on the deck, giving commands and taking full control of the crew's every move as the mighty ship charged through the water at a neck-breaking speed. Arendelle's flag flapped in the unforgiving wind as Elsa and Anna watched the exercise from ashore.

The sight of Hans so noble made Elsa's heart pound erratically, recognizing the unmistakable feeling of attraction pulsing through her veins once again. But it was tainted with sadness. Any joy his presence brought her also came along with the pangs of the past. It hurt to want him. To admire him. But there was nothing in this world that would ever stop her from holding a special place for him in her heart. What was supposed to be a queen watching her navy be led by an allied admiral was so much more than that.

"Look at Hans, all in charge and giving orders. It's like he thrives on power," Anna mocked through chattering teeth, pulling her cloak around her tiny frame to fend off the bitter chill. She was so busy watching the exercise that she didn't see the anguish marring her sister's face.

Hans was the epitome of a distinguished admiral, and he was spellbinding to watch. Elsa remembered the letter his brother had sent her, asking permission to let Hans join the navy. Never thinking that he would find his calling and that place in life he'd always been searching for.

Just then, Hans' head turned to shore, and he could see the blonde blur off in the distance, meeting her gaze across the choppy waters churning between them. Elsa was so struck by his form out on the ship that she didn't notice that Anna was now fully aware that they were staring at each other, her sister with this odd look of miserable longing written all over her features.

Hans turned his attention back to his men and strode to the back of the deck as the ship neared the walls of the fjord.

"Bring the sail back so that you can cut the turn. Agility and speed of the ship will allow you to evade the enemy and capture the best needed positioning for battle." The crew scurried to follow Hans' instructions but brought the sail back too fast and overshot their target position, clocking Hans in the head and sending him overboard.

"Oh my God!" The sisters yelled in cadence. Elsa instinctively ran to the edge of the dock, like being closer was going to somehow help, and started panicking.

Hans bobbed in the water like a human buoy, floating unconscious all by his lonesome self.

"Why isn't someone going in after him?!" She yelled to the officers at her side.

"Those waters are freezing, Ma'am. That's pure glacier and snow runoff. The men are trained to retrieve a man overboard from the ship and never get in the water for fear of losing more men."

That was all Elsa needed to hear before she gathered up her skirt in her hand and flew down the stone boat ramp.

"Elsa!" Anna pleaded, but it was too late.

In a move only Anna and Hans had seen before, the queen blazed a path of solid ice across the water directly to Hans, running as fast as her feet would carry her with her determined arm pumping like a locomotive.

Her shimmering cape billowed behind her as her dress flourished into a fiery dark fuchsia, the color of fear. Anna had never seen it turn that hue before, but she knew what it meant. Elsa was deathly afraid for Hans and was going to his rescue.

"Hans!" Elsa screamed, blood curdling and frantic, but there was no answer. She could hear the swarm of guards following behind her on the glowing strip of ice, and the sides of the path began to sprout giant curved walls to keep out the crashing waves and protect her men.

As she got closer, she could see the red bob of hair dip below the waterline and sink into the black of the fjord, swallowing him whole.

"No!" She screamed, still a good distance away. Every inhibition flew from Elsa as she sprinted faster to Hans. She wasn't the queen. He wasn't an admiral. The coronation. The bitter end of the betrothal. It was as if none of it had ever occurred as she knelt along the sturdy plane of ice to fish out the man she refused to let drown and leave her life forever.

The only thing she could grab onto was Hans' hair, and she melted several holes through the ice to get to him. Elsa brought him to the side and held his head out of the water, using all her strength, until her guards pulled him up onto the ice. They laid him flat on his back, bone-white with blue lips, not breathing or moving.

One of the many things that Anna insisted she and Elsa do after the Great Thaw was learn how to swim. And Elsa only agreed to do so if they learned what to do in the event of an emergency. She refused to lose another family member to the sea. She, Anna, and a few of the guards had learned the latest drowning techniques from a doctor in the Netherlands, and that was the first thing that came to mind as she stared at Hans' lifeless body laying on the slab of ice.

 _Respirations!_ "He needs respirations," she cried, hysterically panting as she tried to keep her thoughts straight.

Not a twinge of hesitation prevented Elsa from doing what needed to be done. She tried to recall the steps, tilting Hans' head back and opening his mouth by lowering his chin. Then she launched herself over him and aligned her lips with his, creating the perfect seal, and she filled his lungs with life-giving air. Except, nothing happened.

"Pound his chest, Your Majesty! There could be water in there."

Elsa thudded her fists against Hans' chest but failed to rouse him. Refusing to give up, she brought her lips back to his, giving it her all as she closed her eyes and poured her pleas into her breath.

 _Please. Please don't leave me._

The guards were silent while they waited on pins and needles, knowing they would never be able to tell anyone how the queen had shamelessly laid herself over the fallen admiral with such desperation etched on her face. It was like her whole world was slipping away from her. Until Hans' stomach lurched, and he violently coughed up a good quart of seawater.

"Roll him on his side," a guard yelled frantically, fear-induced chaos afflicting them all. The Southern Isles had agreed to _lend_ Arendelle their admiral. Not sacrifice him over a simple exercise.

Elsa did as they said, thanking the heavens above when she heard Hans gasp for precious air. He coughed and spit up more water, sounding awful, but Elsa was almost brought to tears by what she felt were the beautiful sounds of a life not lost. Hans was finally able to catch his breath, still heaving pretty badly and trying to reach for the back of his head as he moaned in agony.

"Get him inside," she demanded. "And get that ship into harbor!" She wasn't about to nearly lose an admiral _and_ a brand new ship in the same day.

* * *

Hans was brought to an unused family bedroom with a fireplace where the royal physician saw to his care. Maids, servants, and members of the Southern Isles Navy bustled in and out of the room while Elsa slumped against the wall outside and helplessly listened in.

After what felt like hours, the noise in the room fell silent as everyone left, one by one. On his way out, the physician assured the queen that the admiral would be just fine in a few days' time. Recommending rest and heat to undo any damage the mild hypothermia had caused. The bump on the head would heal on its own.

With everyone gone, and her dress back to its natural teal, Elsa quietly crept into Hans' room with her guard down more than she would have dared under normal circumstances. He was bundled up and tucked into bed with the covers up to his prominent chin, head wrapped in a bandage and the color slowly returning to his face.

"How are you feeling?" Elsa queried, softer than a whisper, and she walked to the far corner of the bed.

Hans struggled to speak, but pushed himself to, given that it was Elsa who had asked. "Cold."

"Not really something I can help you with. I'm not known for making things warmer." Her smile was lovely in the golden glow of the fireplace. "I can have some soup sent up. Or gløgg. I love how gløgg always tastes like Christmas. Even in the summer, it can just transport you back to gingerbread and presents and-"

"Are you rambling?" Hans interjected with a laugh that turned into a wretched cough. "I just thought I remembered you being the _non-_ rambling sister." They both laughed that time; Elsa admitted to herself that she'd been a little nervous about what exactly to say to him, and then his face pulled serious. "They said you saved me. Made a bridge of ice across the water to get to me. What on Earth possessed you to do that?"

"It was my natural reaction to rescue you. I didn't want to lose you. I lost two parents to the sea. I didn't want to lose another... person." She'd almost said loved one, but that wasn't the right word, not at that time.

"You gave me respirations."

Elsa nodded, unapologetically. Because she would have done it over again without hesitation. "I did. I thought... you might die without them."

"I tried to take your life, and now you've saved mine. I will never be able to repay you now."

No truer statement could have been said.

"Make my navy a force to be reckoned with. That's how you can repay me." Hans smiled, voice hurting too much to speak. "Did you want soup or gløgg?" Elsa asked as she headed back out the door.

"Soup. My chest burns, and I think alcohol is the last thing I need."

"I'll have some sent up."

"Elsa?" Getting her to stop before leaving. Hans locked eyes with her for a moment, wordlessly amazed by the strength of character she'd shown him throughout the entire day, and now. "Thank you."

She smiled again, but it was one straight out of their youth. A carefree kind he hadn't seen in a long time, because it was one she'd only reserved just for him.

"You're welcome."

* * *

 _Thank you all for the follows, reviews, and even to those readers who unofficially follow this story. It's getting great traffic and that puts a huge smile on my face._

 _I use music to help me write and I used to post my chapter inspirations on my tumblr. Since I don't promote on tumblr anymore, here's the my musical inspiration for this chapter. Sometimes it's fun to listen to after reading :) Enjoy and have an awesome week!_

 _Grenade by Salt Lake Pops ft. Lindsay Stirling (Rescue on the fjord)._

 _Legends of the Fall Soundtrack- Piano Theme (The whole story)._


	9. Open Doors, Open Hearts

_Thank you to my beta Let-it-geaux._

* * *

After leaving Hans' room on a much more sanguine note than the last two times they'd parted ways, Elsa went downstairs and asked Kai to have some warm broth brought to the man she'd inadvertently rescued in the most dramatic fashion the kingdom had ever seen. And Hans and Elsa were both equally as happy that for once they had ended the evening in a way that wasn't so disparaging and didn't make the summer naval arrangements more awkward than they had already been. Their meeting this time was more than cordial and left her with warm satisfaction humming in her veins, striking the small balance they had been unable to reach before.

Elsa put one sore foot in front of the other and dragged herself back up to the family living quarters where she passed Anna just as she was quietly shutting the door to the nursery.

"Someone off to dreamland?" Elsa asked melodically, thinking the same destination was probably best for herself as well as baby Kristian.

Anna quickly caught up to Elsa's steadfast pace and walked beside her. "Yes. And not a moment too soon," she chuckled before becoming unusually quiet, taking up a sudden interest in her right braid and toying with it in her hands. Any kind of quiet with Anna was unusual, but this was a palpable silence. "Can we talk?" She muttered at last, hesitant eyes shifting to her older sister.

"My room?" Elsa suggested, motioning down the hall with a tilt of her head. "I'm exhausted and going to call it an early night. We can chat while I get ready."

Elsa excused herself to the washroom for a moment while Anna made herself comfortable on the sumptuous lilac bed. Anna always thought it was funny that for someone who predominantly embodied the blue spectrum these days, when her dress wasn't suddenly transforming on her, Elsa had actually grown up in a world of lavender, violet, and amethyst. But somehow the shade suited her well. Deep. Emotional. Mysterious. Royal. Elsa in a nutshell.

Changed into a fresh powder blue nightgown, Elsa came to join Anna on the comforter where she was shyly sitting cross-legged in the center.

"What did you want to talk about?" Elsa asked as she defrosted her hair and began to unravel it from its trademark platinum plait, weary fingers nimbly undoing the stress of the day as her hair came to hang down her narrow back.

Teal eyes studied the geometric pattern of the elaborate bedspread before Anna gulped down her nerves and spoke so softly Elsa had to strain to hear her. "What happened out there today?"

"The main line hit Hans in the head, and he fell overboard. Nearly drowning. You were there." Elsa answered without missing a beat or changing her tired yet content expression as she combed out her hair with her fingers and flicked a section over her shoulder.

"Yeah," Anna laughed for a moment as she recalled the long plunge Hans had taken into the fjord. "And it's ironic because that's not the first time Hans has fallen off a ship from a blow to the head."

Both girls stopped and giggled guiltily for a moment. Because even though the day had been filled with such a serious tone, Elsa would never forget the time her baby sister single-handedly sent a grown man flying over the side of a ship for breaking her heart.

"He deserved it that time you punched him."

"Yeah, he did." The laughter died as the weight of Anna's burning question hung at the tip of her tongue. "But today was different," changing her tone entirely. "You went after him. Without hesitation. And you ran with such _urgency_. Your dress was red, like fire. You gave him mouth-to-mouth."

"That's a technique for drowning victims. You would have done the same for Kristian," the older woman argued, as if her heroic actions meant almost nothing.

"Yes, but he's my child." There was a stagnant beat of silence, and Elsa knew her tough facade wasn't fooling Anna, waiting for the truth to catch up with her at any minute. "Are you... is there something going on between you and Hans?" Open doors didn't just mean physically leaving the door open. It meant laying out her heart for Anna and letting her in on all of the deep thoughts she tended to keep to herself. Especially family secrets.

Elsa let the stalks of blonde fall away from her fingers as she steadied herself, ready for her massive reveal. "No. But there was."

" _Excuse_ me?" Anna gaped, thinking something had been happening but not expecting such an outright confirmation so quickly, or bluntly. And it shocked her to her very core to hear it in person. The look of anger and betrayal clouding Anna's eyes prompted Elsa to immediately backtrack and explain herself in a way that didn't further hurt the sister she swore to protect.

"It's not exactly what you think. And I never thought the day would come where I'd have to explain this to you." Elsa grew eerily quiet, and Anna could tell something profound was coming by the way Elsa pulled herself back into her thoughts, solemn emotion washing over her porcelain features. "I love Papa, very much. But he kept many secrets from you. My powers and your memory of them amongst others." The mention of their father already had her eyes becoming watery. "Before Mama and Papa passed, I was betrothed to Hans."

"Wha-whi-wa... for how long?" Anna managed to spit the words out before she choked on them completely.

"It was decided on the day I was born. When Mama and Papa found out I was a girl. At the time, Arendelle was very close with the Southern Isles, who had plenty of eligible princes, but Hans was the closest to my age. I knew about him and the arrangement for as long as I can remember. I met him for the first time when I was seven. And we started writing to each other after that. We were to be married after my twenty-second birthday, but it was called off when I was eighteen. The day after the last time I saw him actually, until my coronation."

"Why?" This was suddenly the most fascinating story ever. Anna knew Elsa had layers and depth but this was mind-blowing to her.

"Papa never told me why. There was no explanation." As much as Anna wanted to fume over how everyone could have kept this from her, she put all negative emotions on hold once she saw Elsa slowly falling apart with each word she spoke. There had been a lifetime of memories between Hans and Elsa before the coronation had ever taken place. Instead of flying off the handle like one might have expected, Anna placed her hand on her sister's back and gave Elsa all the time in the world to let her heart speak for itself.

"How did you take it?" Anna asked more sympathetically.

"I was devastated. I..." Elsa stopped herself, unable to admit it, but Anna knew.

"You loved him."

The truth hit Elsa hard, like a thunderbolt straight out of the deep pit she'd thrown all of her forgotten emotions into, and her lips trembled as she tried to keep herself from shedding any tears. She let out a shuddered breath, Anna squeezing her hand tighter as she realized the magnitude of heartbreak Elsa had endured at such a lonely time in her life.

"He was different then," Elsa continued stoically. "Actually, more like he is now. We were both so alone. I had no one. And even though he didn't know about my powers, he knew how miserable I was. We were each other's strength."

"But you loved him?" Anna pressed gently.

"With all my heart." With the confession finally came tears of sorrow and devastation. Elsa hadn't just loved Hans. It had been a great love of epic proportions. "And I can never reconcile the man I loved with the man that came to my coronation."

That had been the crux of her inner turmoil since Hans' return. She felt like she knew so many sides of Hans that she couldn't begin to understand which was the _real_ him. Elsa wanted more than anything to believe this new Hans was based in sincerity, that the deviant who came to kill her was just part of one of her many nightmares. But the truth was he was all of those things. A wonderful young man who'd won her heart with his poetic letters and chivalrous nature. Kisses that seared her lips and set her soul on fire. A master manipulator charged with attempted assassination. A valiant admiral that managed to grip her with his very presence. A matrix of personalities she'd yet to process and weed through.

"Did you... did he ever kiss you?" Elsa's brows rose awkwardly as if to ask if Anna _really_ wanted to hear the answer to that. "Really," she affirmed softly, maturely.

"Yes."

"Well, at least he must have truly loved you. He didn't even want to kiss me." It was a conversation with no winners. Elsa wrapped her arms around Anna's tiny waist and cried into her shoulder. Mixed emotions of the splendor she'd experienced when Hans had placed his lips on hers clashed with the bitter anger she had over his deceitfulness and the way he'd left Anna to die. There was no excuse, and yet her mind would never let her forget the young prince who'd been promised to her.

"So, today, you saved him. Why?"

"He just asked me the same thing." To a few out on the fjord who were old enough to remember the betrothal from having served under the late King, it was no secret why Elsa had saved Hans the way she did but even she had to stop and think about what had gone through her mind. "It was a reaction. I couldn't bear to lose him. I don't even know what to make of the whole thing myself."

Elsa shrugged as if she had no other explanation while Anna tried to adjust to the huge jarring revelation that had just impacted her world. "Wow," she breathed through her obvious shell shock. "I think I'm actually just as confused as you are. I don't really know how to feel. What about Henrik?" Wasn't _that_ the million-dollar question?

"He's a good man. And good for me."

"Do you love him like you loved Hans? That feels so weird to say."

Elsa took in a pensive breath before she wistfully met Anna's frazzled eyes. "At the coronation ball, I asked you what you knew about true love. That was me being bitter about what happened with Hans. How I thought what we had was true love. And also, the sacrifices I made for your safety were true love. And I felt like you didn't understand that at the time. Familial true love, what we have, I understand. Romantic true love? I believe you know more than me. You have a healthy happy marriage, you have a family. And I don't know if what I had with Hans is more real than what I have with Henrik."

"That's a question I think only you can answer." Elsa nodded and smiled at her wise little sister as Anna let out a breath and sighed loudly. "I'm glad you told me. It changes so much, but still, I'm glad. Are there any more secrets I need to know about? Or that exist? It's going to take a while just to absorb this one."

"No. Two is enough, don't you think?" Elsa rolled her eyes, slightly embarrassed for having to keep anything from Anna in the first place, and found herself lightly laughing, from emotional exhaustion if anything.

Anna glanced at her sister and studiously looked her over. When Elsa laughed, she bubbled over with this irresistible charm. She was a powerful leader; but more than that, she was such a special person to have in one's life.

"Elsa, you deserve love. I don't know when or how, but I know you will find it. And that man will be the luckiest man on the planet. You are a prize to be won. Remember that. Not just for your crown, but for your heart."

The throb of warmth through Elsa's chest was overwhelming. "When the did you become so much wiser than me?" Playfully nodding her head against Anna's copper bangs so that their foreheads rested against one another. I

"I think it's the reward you get after fourteen hours of labor with a ten pound baby." Beautiful smiles broke out on each of their faces, relief and calm over taking the smattering of russet and pale freckles.

"Thank you, Anna."

* * *

More sleepless nights met the queen and the admiral each time their heads hit the pillow. Oddly enough, it wasn't just the thoughts of the rescue lingering in their minds. For each, their reverie also took them to places of temptation.

With Henrik off on his travels, Elsa should have been thinking about him keeping her warm at night. But visions of Hans' arms wrapping around her as she slept filled her head instead. It was wrong, and she knew it, but her heart so naturally longed for him that she couldn't help herself.

When daylight broke, she chided herself for being so weak. Not just for letting herself drift away from Henrik but also for still having feelings for a man who had tried to murder her. A simple fact that seemed to slip from her conscience more and more lately, but flowed like molten lava beneath her skin. There was a score to settle, a motive to understand, and Elsa needed to hear Hans out more than she needed air in her lungs.

* * *

Hans was wrapping up a meeting in the council chambers, just himself and a few other men. Not enough to fill the room even by half.

Elsa waited patiently outside the massive doors, and when Hans emerged from the room, she discreetly pulled him aside and spoke very quietly.

"Do you have a moment to talk?" Her perfectly painted lips captured every ounce of his attention.

"I have all the time in the world for you." A dashing smile swept across his face, casual and more natural than he'd afforded her before.

"Good. Come with me."

Another meeting was taking place soon, and the two made sure to scurry out of sight before too many eyes caught them sneaking off upstairs.

"This is the only room available," Elsa apologized as she shut the door to where else but the library. "There seems to be so many meetings this morning. I'm sorry."

"No, it's fine." Hans placed himself in front of the hearth, waiting to follow Elsa's lead. "What did you want to talk about?"

She followed him until it seemed like she hit an invisible boundary, coming to a stop a good five feet away from him and not an inch more, arms crossing herself and telegraphing her anxiousness to him. "How's your head?"

"Fine," he answered with a raised brow. "What's the thing you really want to ask me?"

Elsa rolled her eyes and shifted her gorgeous frame from one hip to the other, so that her dress rose high enough to afford him a glimpse of those icy heels. "I know you better than you think," he added.

"I'm aware. It unnerves me sometimes," Elsa replied. The sass melted away as she dropped her arms and tried to talk over the galloping pounding inside her chest. "I want to know."

"Want to know what?"

" _Everything_ ," she demanded politely. "Everything you wanted to tell me the day you arrived and I didn't give you the chance. I want to know what happened. What happened to us."

"Everything?" Hans answered as if her request had been a challenge. A story he hoped she could stomach.

"I _have_ to know. Something is happening, and I can't make sense of anything when I'm missing so many pieces to this puzzle."

Neither moved, and it didn't seem like Elsa was going to do so anytime soon, so Hans prepared himself, with a roll of his shoulders, to brave this whole thing standing. "I'll start at the beginning. The last time we were in this room, over there," eyes flicking to the nook by the window, stilling Elsa's heart. "I told you I loved you, and I meant it."

"I know that part. I can't ever sit at that infernal window because of that night." He had to admit that made him slightly happy to know that she still thought about that night after all these years.

"When I left, my father saw you in the hall. He said you put your hands on a table, and ice shot out across the surface, freezing a vase and causing it to shatter. And then you stomped your foot, and ice spread out over the floor. I was told it was glowing."

Sapphire eyes fell to the floor, the first piece to that puzzle she'd been trying to put together for the last six years. "He saw that?"

"Yes. And it terrified him. He was a very religious man and obsessed with power. You were not only an abomination but also a threat to him." The frown on her morose face made his stomach roil. "Anyhow, it was _he_ who called off the betrothal. He told your father before we left, and he told me on the voyage home. I've never felt such a sudden loss in my life."

His words stung but were simultaneously freeing. To know that everything had ended against both of their wills.

"When your parents died, I was so worried for you that I started writing again. I didn't care that the betrothal was done for. I wanted to comfort you because I was still in love with you. In the last letter I wrote, I asked you to marry me." A delicate hand came to cover Elsa's lips at the news. Emotions brewing like a bubbling geyser threatening to erupt. "I didn't care what our parents said. I wanted to be with you of my own free will.

"You never answered, obviously. And I decided to run away to Arendelle. To be with you. I bought a ring and everything."

"What happened?" She asked in almost a whisper.

"I was caught by my father, brothers, and a handful of guards. Because you were going to become queen in three years, my father convinced himself that you would abuse your power and take over the other kingdoms. You had this power that no army could defeat, and he couldn't stand to watch the alliance crumble. He said you'd enslave our people."

"What a lie," Elsa spat furiously.

"That's what I said. I didn't even know about your powers, but I could never see you hurting others like that. He painted you to be this demon. I only knew an angel.

"The plan for the coronation- my _father's_ plan, mind you- was to assassinate you. Kill the queen. Save the alliance. I refused, even after they beat me. That day, there was no way out, so I submitted to his abuse, hoping that I would have another opportunity to run away or get out of it somehow. I never got to leave. And I spent those three years being tortured and brainwashed into following the plan. I had to do it because I was closest with you. They thought I could get you alone and poison you or something."

Her face twisted in frightened confusion. "Torture? Like they beat you?"

"More psychological than that?"

"I don't understand."

There was only one way to explain. Hans stood and removed his jacket, carefully folding it over the back of a chair.

"Forgive me," he said as he pulled his shirt out from his pants and showed Elsa the splatter of red blotches across his lower torso.

Propelled by curiosity and horror, Elsa came closer to Hans to get a better look. Her delicate fingers traced the line of scarlet dots, trying to understand what could have made such an odd mark.

"What is this from?"

"Acid."

Elsa hissed and jerked her hand away, aghast by the very thought.

"They wanted to dehumanize you to me. So I was strapped down and forced to say your name. If I refused, my father would say it instead. And then I'd get some sort of pain to break the connection. So when I said your name, I got a drop of acid on my skin."

"Hans..." She gasped sharply.

"There's more, and it gets worse. A few of my brothers, the terrible ones I'd spoken of in the past, joined in on the fun. For one of them, his favorite thing was to make up stories about you while I hung from the shackles in the dungeon."

Elsa clutched her hands close to her body, just above her heart. "What kind of stories? Or do I want to know?"

"Stories about you with other men."

"A-Against my will?"

Hans nodded regretfully. "Those made me angry. But it was the ones about you falling in love with someone else and... you together on your wedding night that hurt the most."

Her face blanched, whiter than even her normal pallor, horror washing over her features. "You're family is sick." Hans' eyes flicked down to her dress, noticing how the color was draining away from it and leaving a lifeless gray behind in its place.

"Indeed."

"When I came here for the coronation, I was ready to kill you. I met Anna, and she was my in to talking to you. When that didn't happen, I got close to her and proposed to her, knowing she'd have to ask for your blessing."

"Yes. And you kept looking at me like you were enjoying my suffering."

"I did. I had suffered, and you were the reason. That's what I told myself. If you hadn't been born. If I hadn't had met you. If you didn't have powers, none of this would have ever happened to me. I hated you.

"But I still loved you. Barely, but enough that when you fell in your ice castle, and I held you in my arms, I remembered how it felt to have you close. You were so beautiful, and you were like this embodiment of your powers. Everything, just so beautiful.

"When you told me you didn't know how to control your powers or how to stop the winter, I had no choice but to kill you. I couldn't go home without finishing the plan, and I couldn't stay and rule with Anna with a frozen wasteland for a kingdom.

"I didn't want to marry Anna, and when she said you froze her heart and only I could save her, I chose not to. Everything my father put me through made this dark side of me come out. And it came out in spades with Anna. I couldn't stand how optimistic she was about love. I had had my dreams and my life... and my love… taken from me. I wanted her to learn how that felt. Because that was _real_ love. Having something you think is amazing, only for it end up being the source of you never-ending pain. I left her to die so that I could rule on my own. If I couldn't have you, I didn't want anyone. I said what I needed to say on the fjord to hurt you and to get you to stop running. I knew blaming you for Anna's death would break you, so I said it. I was pure evil."

"Keep going," Elsa demanded on the brink of tears. "Tell the whole story. Say what you did. Admit it!"

A layer of frost branched out beneath her feet, and her dress was now a vortex of black and gray. Hans watched the ice crackle towards his feet, never before feeling so awful about how his words were dragging her to the depths of despair. Despite the torture he'd endured, he'd carried out those terrible deeds and gave her an honest account of what happened out on that frozen fjord, looking equally as ripped apart by regret and sorrow as Elsa.

"You collapsed to the ground, grieving. The storm stopped, and I knew that was the answer. Death.

"I walked over to you, a helpless queen mourning her sister and blinded by tears. And I withdrew my sword, swung it above your head... and if Anna hadn't had stopped me, I would have killed you."

Elsa was back on that fjord. She could remember the feeling of her heart being torn from her chest as her knees hit the solid ice below. He had been responsible for taking her to the peak of exhalation and the very depths of hell.

"You have every right to hate me. You had every right to execute me."

She was quiet, though piping hot with anger like an abandoned tea kettle left on the stove for too long. Her chest heaved as her emotion tornadoed through her body.

"I'm sorry," Hans rasped, desperate and wrecked as he humbly stood before her.

"You're sorry?" She sneered and began to circle him like a battleship on the move, anger storming in her blazing blue eyes. "You're sorry?!" Hans knew this had been coming, but it gutted him to hear it. To see the devastation consume to an unrecognizable point. Her hands were balled up at her sides, teeth gritted, and tears streamed down her anguished features. "How could you do that to me?! How could do that to my sister?!" The higher and louder Elsa's voice got the more she lost control over herself. Out of fear and an overwhelming need to stop the rage he'd instilled in her, Hans wrapped his arms around her and didn't let go even when she tried to break free. "You're the monster, not me. You're the monster! I hate you! I hate you!" She thrashed in his arms until the anger apexed, and she broke down sobbing, held up only by his strength, for hers drained entirely.

Her tiny body went limp, and she cried for the tragic tale that had become his life. _Their_ life. Six years of not knowing, of heartache and bitter resentment, came pouring out of her. Hans held her head, cradling her to his chest. They needed this moment, to mourn what could have been and to grieve the terrible way they'd been torn apart. How they'd hurt each other.

"I'm sor-" Hans started.

"He's the monster," holding a hand over his mouth. "Your father. He's the monster. He did this to you. To us." Hans had waited three long years to tell Elsa the truth. But instead of the relief he'd hoped to gain from her understanding, he was drowning in pity for the both of them. The realization in Elsa's eyes was almost too painful to bear.

"I'm never going to be able to take what I did back. The image of me holding that sword above your head will never be erased from any of our memories." It was true, and they both knew it. Elsa nodded her head and tried to regain her composure, though she knew she could always be raw in front of Hans.

"Caleb told me that when your father died and he suggested the military, you told him you wanted to make me proud of you."

"I did," a smile finally stretching over his lips. "And I didn't know he told you that."

"On the day of the exercise, when I watched you command that crew and stand at the helm of the ship, I was proud of you."

No one had ever said they were proud of Hans, ever. Except for Elsa. And she knew he'd remember that moment always. Tuck it in his pocket and take it out on a lonely day at sea.

"Elsa, what's left for us? Where do we go from here?"

There'd been so much to digest that she almost felt like she might vomit from the marathon of emotions. "Everything you told me is a lot to take in. I may need a lifetime to come to understand it all."

Hans understood and was willing to give her all the time she needed. All he ever asked for when he first arrived was a chance to explain himself. She gave him that, and now he felt like only time would tell what would become of them.

Elsa wiped the tip of her button nose before swiping the rest of her tears away from her flushed cheeks. And he couldn't stand to let her leave like that. Before he could think, he placed his hand on her cheek, and she tilted her head back to look up at him, letting him caress her and gaze at her so tenderly.

"However we go forward from this, I want you to know that I never stopped loving you. I never stopped wanting to be with you. What I've done conflicts with that, I understand. But I'm not that person on the fjord. I'm that young man that swore to love you until the day I die. I'm a man who will forever be healing from my father's cruelty. And forever be begging for forgiveness. I'm a man who's still in love with you. Even if you never love me back again."

Her lips pulled into a frown, not knowing if she could ever love him back the way she once had.

Elsa couldn't even bring herself to utter a single word; she was so mentally worn. So instead, she simply nodded and nuzzled into his hand, savoring that hauntingly familiar touch one last time before she slipped out of his arms and out of the room.


	10. Remnants in the Garden

Kristoff had no idea what time it was when he ran downstairs so quickly he thought he might topple over his own two pear-shaped feet. The castle was dead silent as he wound his way around the creaky lower hallways and into the kitchen.

He was surprised to find a glowing ball of light radiating from the other side of the room. The fireplace was lit, usually meant to keep the kitchen staff warm during the harsh Arendelle winters, but there wasn't a cook or servant in sight. Just a lonely queen covered in a knitted blanket, leaning back in a motionless rocking chair with her eyes fixed on nothing in particular.

As odd as it was to see Elsa deep in transient thought, and apparently lost in the flickering flames of the burning logs, he had more important things to tend to.

She didn't turn around once to see what all the racket was about as Kristoff tore open cupboard after cupboard on a hunt for lord knows what.

"Have you seen the liquor? Kristian's teething." He grunted in frustration.

Elsa didn't reply and simply held up a brown bottle that had been sitting beside her in her limp little hand and hiccupped daintily.

"Why haven't you asked me what I'm doing down here yet?" She slurred in a way that made Kristoff question whether she was insanely exhausted or simply had one too many sips of the amber liquid sloshing around in the bottle. He guessed the latter.

"I figure if you wanted to tell me, you would have by now. You're not a woman who waits for permission to speak." Well that was certainly true.

"Anna told you, didn't she?" Elsa surmised and raised her brows to him, one awkwardly higher than the other, as Kristoff grabbed the bottle by its thin neck and set it on the countertop.

"Yeah. Don't be mad," holding up his brawny hands defensively, but Elsa just rolled her head from one side to the other, like the weight of it was too much to handle, and chuckled to herself.

"I'm not mad. I expected her to. She does it because she cares." A grin laced with sadness stretched across her face, flames sparkling in her blown-out pupils. It was funny how not even alcohol couldn't mend her wounds at this point.

"She cares about you a lot," Kristoff added.

"No, it's not just me. I mean you too. She tells you because she cares about _you_. She _confides_ in you. It's good," lazily giving a raise of her shoulder. It's what Elsa wished she had herself, but she was still always overjoyed that Kristoff was a huge source of support for her sister. There were some things husbands provided that sisters, no matter how much they loved each other, could not.

"So Hans, huh?" Nervously clearing his throat as he leaned against the counter and ran his fingers over the lip of the edge, the savory aroma of mutton and vegetables from that night's dinner still wafting in the air. "I would have never guessed _that_."

"Based on the coronation?" She asked without taking a pause.

"Well, yeah."

She was so placidly calm for talking about such a difficult topic, but alcohol tended to blunt one's emotions that way. He assumed that was her sole purpose for even being down there.

"Well _I_ would have never guessed all that would have happened based on what I knew. _Who_ I knew," trailing off at the end.

Her eyes languidly shifted back to the fireplace, letting the unpredictable pattern of the flames capture her attention, taking it off the bewildering account of the past six years of mysteries and lies she'd heard earlier from Hans.

"I stay out of Anna and Hans'... um... past." Kristoff went on, despite not knowing what the heck to call what transpired between those two. "I don't know much about him. I don't trust him either, but I trust you, and you must be very conflicted."

She shifted back towards her brother-in-law and tried to keep her eyes focused on his mop of sandy blonde hair. "That's quite the understatement; and yet, it's extremely accurate."

Kristoff glanced curiously down at the bottle. She hadn't consumed that much, but at Elsa's weight, it didn't take much to get that head change she'd been chasing.

"In my three years of knowing you, I've never seen you drink hard liquor." Though on this occasion, he couldn't blame her.

A guilty smile stretched across her face, cheeks warm with inebriation and the constant lick of the fire on her fair skin. "Let's just say it soothes more than aching gums."

Kristoff grabbed the bottle of aquavit and started to head out of the kitchen. "Just don't go swinging around any clock towers or anything," he jested. A thing they did as part of their quasi brother-sister relationship.

"I wasn't drunk, I was sick that time," she insisted and straightened in her chair, back aligning like the queen that she was. "And I'm not drunk now." The slurring of her words begged to differ, and whether Elsa had been sick or not two years ago, her fever-induced delirium had those who witnessed it talking for weeks.

"Elsa, you don't have to explain yourself to me." He flashed her a comforting smile, making sure he left her in good spirits, and held the bottle up as if to toast her invisible glass. "Goodnight."

She could hear Kristian wailing from all the way down in the kitchen as Kristoff headed out. "Good luck."

"You too."

* * *

The waters of the fjord were a brilliant aquamarine as the afternoon light sparkled across the harbor. Hans' eyes kept drifting out to the expansive view from his seat in the council chambers, and he didn't have to look over his shoulder to know that Elsa's studious eyes were watching his every move like a hawk observing the landscape.

It was a simple meeting to talk about the navy's progress and how well Hans was whipping their men into shape. Captain after captain raved about his exceptional skills and unparalleled knowledge of the sea. But it struck Elsa funny how Hans didn't seem to pay any attention to their praises. A smile played across his lips, eyes still glancing out to the bobbing ships along the docks, and Elsa surprisingly found herself happily smiling along with him. She was at least half listening to her men, only because their words painted a picture of this interesting new Hans she was extremely intrigued by. _Admiral Westergard_ left such a delightful ring in her ears and a reverberating zing in her chest each time someone mentioned his name as she subconsciously catalogued every new expression and quirk of his features.

The meeting was adjourned, and Elsa was the last to leave as everyone hurried down the stairs and spilled out into the courtyard to enjoy the break for lunch. Hans straggled behind, having nowhere to be, and was surprised to feel the tap of slender fingers on his epaulette.

"Take a walk with me?" Elsa's kind voice offered. Her smile was light and rosy, a complete change from the crestfallen woman he'd seen just a few days ago in the library.

"Sure," glad to see that characteristic twinkle had returned to her eyes.

Elsa turned slightly and coyly tilted her head towards the French doors leading out to the garden, gleaming as if she had a secret behind those blushing cheeks, and Hans happily followed her to the place he'd been dying to revisit since he returned to Arendelle.

They strolled along the winding stone pathway, boots and ice heels clicking along under the blossoming wisteria dripping from overhead as their eyes repeatedly caught and darted away from each other.

"I didn't know if you'd be speaking to me again after the other day," breaking the silence, even though Hans was very much enjoying their little eye-glance game.

Smells of fragrant wild flowers filled her head as Elsa took in a drawn-out breath, relief and serenity apparent in her long sigh. "I can't live with this sadness and anger in my heart anymore. I think it's healing to at least be amicable."

"I couldn't agree more." They rounded a familiar break in the walkway, and Hans' eyes lit up at what he saw close by. "Let's go right, through here," he pointed and led her by the hand to a shady spot underneath the largest willow in the garden. "You remember this spot?" Hans asked as they held hands and admired the lushness of the canopy above, fragments of sunshine breaking through the layers of leaves to make their faces look luminous in the afternoon light.

"You always ask me as if I've forgotten that you kissed me here." Her chin dipped demurely as her shyness got the best of her. "I can never forget." Fanning lashes blinked up at him with the same sky blue eyes that had bewitched him over eleven years ago. Hans remembered that sweet little kiss as if it were yesterday.

"We were just children," he began.

"With the whole world at our feet. Nothing but dreams of the future," Elsa added to his narrative. The sounds of two giggling children could still be heard echoing through the weeping willows, as if no time had passed since their first meeting. A childhood innocence that would eventually become victim to plans of another. "How tragic are we?" She lamented. "To have had things aligned so wonderfully? Only to lose each other in such an awful way."

"Not lost. I'm here." The gentle caress of Hans' hand on her cheek was the solace Elsa had been craving. It made her eyes flutter closed as she surrendered to the haven of his gentle touch. Hans smiled and felt the warmth of the sun slipping over the stone wall and onto his back. It illuminated Elsa's hair and face so that she looked more angelic than ever. The moment enraptured them both, possessing them with a need to rewrite the moments that had been snared by tragedy. A thirst to breathe life into the once forbidden possibilities and make them a reality again. "I don't know how it's possible... but I love you more now than any of the other times I've stood before you like this."

That tempting, debonair voice of his called to her, the part of her that acted before thinking. Elsa leaned in and tilted her head, raising and lowering her lips to his as if she couldn't make up her mind what to do with them.

"Stop thinking," Hans whispered. "Sometimes your mind gets in the way of your heart."

 _I'm sad that I have to leave tomorrow. I wish I could stay here with you._

 _Someday. I'm told we are to be married. Then we'll see each other every day._

There were certain memories Elsa had of her childhood, of the good times. Games she and Anna played together. Stories her father told her while she sat on his knee. Warm, comforting memories that instantly made her yearn for the simpler days of her youth. And Hans was one of those wonderful memories. No matter what he'd done in the past, he was forever entwined into the fabric of her childhood. Forever a part of her.

Trepidation slipped away like the remains of the day, dissipating and melting that barrier that had previously been built up between them. Hans cupped her other cheek, and Elsa parted her lips once she felt him capture them in a tender kiss that pulled on every heartstring in her slender body.

It was magic and healing. Starlight unexpectedly bursting out of every pore of her skin, exalted in the nostalgia of childhood and the bliss of the present, with a man, the _same_ man, who had been the only one who could make her feel like a comet streaking across the sky, on fire and weightless with euphoria.

Hans dropped his hand from her cheek and rested it against her arm, petting her affectionately with happiness swimming in his brilliant green eyes.

Their lips didn't travel too far apart before Elsa decided to tuck her fingers under his lapels and reseal them, opening her mouth slightly more to allow the kiss to become what she'd been dying to feel for the last six years. Elsa always reached a point where doing what she _should_ do conflicted with what she _wanted_ to do. Because right then, she wanted to kiss Hans more than anything else in the world.

His lips were warm and soft, but purposeful like a man's should be. He hugged her lips to his, pulling her body along with the force as she let herself melt into his chest.

Anna watched curiously from the library above. She'd seen her sister kiss men before, including Henrik, and it had never been like this. Elsa had been swept away, dancing on a cloud floating amongst the sun's bright rays. They touched each other with such love, tender and heartfelt. It really was a true love's kiss. She could see that now.

There was no denying it; Elsa loved Hans in a way she would never love another. An unbreakable love that filled her heart and made her truly happy. Anna loved Kristoff, but the only time they kissed quite like that was when they were making love. Judging by the way Hans and Elsa were kissing each other, love-making didn't look too far off.

The bell in the clock tower chimed at the stroke of noon, jolting Elsa back into the endless schedule that awaited her. "I-I have a meeting I have to get to. A lunch, actually. I'm sorry," touching her fingers to her lips as she cautiously stepped away. A curious tingle resonated on them, lingering satisfaction she could still taste. "I'm so sorry."

Hans nodded nobly and dipped into a bow, the same way he always had his entire life. "I'll see you later then, my queen."

He'd never called her that, but she adored it. Especially when he used that deep sultry voice that sent her reeling.

Elsa glanced back at him over her shoulder no more than three times before she finally disappeared back inside the castle. Leaving him love struck to the point where he couldn't stop smiling no matter how hard he tried to conceal his merriment. Though the splendor of the kiss had been amazing, he knew better than to let himself get too worked up over it. Even though Elsa appeared ready to pick up where they left off, she was far from it with so many loose ends yet to tie off.

Back inside, brisk footsteps could be heard trotting towards Elsa as she looked up to find Anna with an oddly wide smile on her face and vigor in her fervent stride.

"Elsa!" She chirped brightly. "Did Henrik come home early?" Knowing full well the answer to her question.

"No. He's not due back for another week or so."

"Oh," Anna replied, chipper tone plummeting back to Earth. "Because I just saw you kissing someone in the garden." Her freckled face lost its jovial flare, practically scowling at her older sister. "When I asked if there was something going on between you and Hans, you said no, but there was. The past between you two is difficult enough to swallow, but clearly something is _currently_ going on." Elsa was petrified wood in her own castle, mind racing as she felt the burn of Anna's glare on her. "Are there any more secrets you want to tell me?" Crossing her arms over her chest with contempt in her fiery gaze.

"Anna, when I said nothing was going on, I meant it at the time. I saved Hans from the fall, but I only kissed him just now. And I'm already berating myself for being so impulsive and betraying my morals."

"You mean betraying Henrik," Anna corrected with more sarcasm that she should have.

The truth sank to the bottom of Elsa's stomach faster than a boulder, making her almost lurch with self-loathing. "Yes."

"Elsa, I don't know what's happening to you."

" _I_ don't know what's happening to me. I just meant to take a walk with him and-"

"And you fell onto his lips?"

"No," Elsa retorted sternly. Austere older sister surfacing like a storm cloud. "I kissed him because I _wanted_ to. Because I've _been_ wanting to for six years, Anna. You don't understand. That spot that we were in. Hans kissed me there when I was seven-years-old. Do you have any idea how special of a memory that is to me? How easily my head and heart could succumb to needing to feel that again?" Her hands had flown to cover her heart, passion in harmony with her desperate tone. "I talked to Hans about the coronation, and I had everything wrong. There's so much more to the story than we ever knew. He was forced to break off the betrothal with me because of my powers. And his father beat him into submission to kill me out of fear."

"That doesn't excuse everything, Elsa." Anna countered, putting her sister on the defense. A position Elsa didn't exactly appreciate.

"I know it doesn't," softening her icy gaze in a more conciliatory manner. "Anna, my entire life has been devoted to protecting you. I care about you and Kristian more than anything else in the world. I know how lonely you were after the accident when I struck you in the head. I know I let you grieve our parents' death by yourself. But I was on the other side of that door suffering too. We've never really talked about this. Not _really_. But not only was I also lonely and grieving in isolation, but I also had to contend with the fear of my powers. The panic attacks. The sadness. I didn't even get to hug Mama and Papa before they died. I didn't get to hug them for the six years before that either!" She almost lost control with that, dress boarding on navy as she swallowed back the most devastating loss of her young life. "I don't know happiness like you do. I'm trying to find it. Please, _please_ don't judge me for the mistakes I make along the way. I'm human, just like everyone else. And I love you, and I would never, _ever_ do anything to intentionally hurt you. But I can't help the way I feel for Hans." Elsa regained her composure, but Anna's anguished expression hadn't changed. "You're the one who said that I deserved love," she reminded gently.

"And you do. I just think you're weaving yourself a web that you're going to have a difficult time getting out of."

* * *

Night fell over the kingdom as the street lamps of the village were extinguished for the evening. Hans had retired to his room and was undressing for bed. He unbuttoned his shirt and folded it over a chair before going over to a mirror that hung above a small dresser. The sun was getting the best of him these days. His hair was getting lighter thanks to the long summer hours on deck. Cooper streaks with hints of gold now covered his head, a look he kind of liked. Cheeks tinged with pink reminded him just how fair his skin really was. Never as light as Elsa's but unable to withstand the rays any better than she.

His fingers smoothed over the stubble growing in on his face, making a mental note to shave in the morning, when there was a small knock at the door.

In nothing but his breeches, Hans scurried to grab his shirt. "Just a minute," he called to the mystery guest who was already turning the knob.

It was Elsa, in her simple blue nightgown with her hair unbraided, curtain of platinum swaying behind her. Hans tried to cover himself in a chivalrous attempt to appear descent, but Elsa wasn't bothered by his lack of clothing one bit. She was more focused on other things.

"I'm sorry. You caught me as I was getting ready for bed," Hans chuckled out of embarrassment but stopped when he saw a melancholic gleam in her morose blue eyes. She didn't say anything and kept quietly padding across the floor and closer to him, face seeming like it was holding back a mosaic of emotions.

The candlelight of the room flickered in her eyes as she reached for his hand and tenderly brought it to her cheek. Her eyes lidded shut with her lip jutted out slightly, nuzzling against the comfort of his palm.

She didn't need to say anything because Hans could always guess what was troubling her. The weight of a kingdom on her tiny shoulders had to be taxing. But not as much as the scars of childhood or the burn of love lost still looming in her heart.

Hate, pain, remorse, guilt, and even affection occupied her thoughts. All fighting for her attention, but only one rising to the surface. Hans was not entirely at fault for what had happened. Elsa was well aware of that. But he had hurt her a few times of his own volition. He'd partially caused the never-ending rain that had cast a gray shadow over their relationship, and he was the only one who could repair the ache throbbing so heavily in her chest.

"Elsa," he whispered sweetly, remorse flowing through his soothing tone and swaddling her in his love. He wanted to add "sweetheart" or "dearest" or "love" to the end of her name but resisted.

He cradled the side of her neck, just below her ear, and caressed her silky white skin with his thumb. Her eyes still hadn't reopened, just savoring the magic of his touch, as if it was the healing force she'd been thirsting for.

"Come here," Hans said and scooped her up into his arms, setting her down on his lap as he rested in a nearby chair.

Elsa curled up to him, arms looping around his neck, as Hans hugged his own around her back. "It's okay," he hushed. "It's okay." His hand stroked over the reams of silken gold locks, his own heart skipping to the rhythm of her soft breathing against his bare chest.

It was so achingly adorable and sad at the same time. Elsa just wanted to be held. It had been so lonely up in her bed all by herself. Every time she tried to process her feelings, she felt like they were going to eat her alive. For she was torn, involved in a tug-of-war of the heart that needed so much healing.

Elsa was always the woman everyone turned to. She was the queen, sovereign mother to her people. She was an older sister, the protector and voice of reason in Anna's life. Even with Henrik, she was always a royal. Not really much of herself. With Hans, she was just Elsa. No titles. No obligations. She owed him nothing but still yearned for everything from him, even after all these years.

It was a dangerous feeling now, but she trusted him enough to allow herself to need him, for just a cuddle if nothing else. They both craved each other's company.

Hans kissed the feathery baby hairs along Elsa's temple. The sting of icy hands nipped at his neck, but after such a hot day, they felt amazingly refreshing.

He smelt like the ocean. Wisps of salt and sun mixed with sweat, like a masculine sheen of armor coating his skin. The broadness of his chest enveloped her, swallowing her in his hold. He was warm against her cheek, and although they were touching skin to skin, it was intimate but not sexual. This was part of the journey they would face on the road to repair. Healing and moving forward, one day at a time.

A thought struck Hans that if he died now, he would go completely satisfied. To have Elsa in his arms again was something he never thought he'd experience. It was better than a kiss because he was her sanctuary. After being the villain in a tragic tale that had cut them both so deeply, he got to be her safety if only for a little while.

Eventually she drifted off to sleep on his chest, neither having wanted to move. Hans placed her on his bed for just a moment while he dressed himself because carrying a sleeping queen through the castle with nothing more than breeches on would have required more explaining than he wanted to do.

Fully dressed, Hans quietly made his way up the giant spiral staircase and down the rich scarlet hallways to Elsa's room, after a few guesses as to where it was. He searched the halls for the tall white door with the blue rosemaling. She'd once told him about it in a letter. Safe and sound in the queen's bedchambers, he pulled back the covers and tucked her in with the greatest of care, kissing her gently on the forehead before he wished her goodnight.

When he shut the door, one thing was crystal clear. He'd never be able to stop loving her. And he suspected a part of her might never be able to stop loving him either. The past had been the platform and foundation for their initial feelings upon his return. But they were now growing more fond of who'd they'd become in their time since the coronation. How they would ever be able to turn what they had into something more was beyond him. With patience and diligence, he knew he'd never stop chasing for what could be.


	11. The Heart Wants

Another busy day was well behind Elsa as she slipped into an evening bath filled with scented oils and a sprinkling of flower petals Gerda always added for that extra bit of pampering. At least once a week, Elsa let the devoted older woman off early, and when she refused on this particular night, Elsa kindly insisted with her persuasive tone and causally mentioned that she really just needed to relax in private. Which was the honest truth.

Alone at last after endless economic advisory meetings and holding court in the great hall, the heat of the water and serene quiet vanquished any remaining stress of the day from Elsa's knotted muscles.

As she dipped below the water and then rested her head against the rounded edge of the tub, eyes closed as the ceiling disappeared from view, her mind drifted back to that magical kiss in the garden, and how it had unmistakably roused the passion within her. Nostalgia had been divinely sweet, but the glimpse of what they could have been together- what they could _still be_ together- was even more provocative as she entertained the fantasy of her and Hans coming together as one.

The scent of lavender accompanied her reverie as Elsa let her mind wander to thoughts of them in the bliss of couplehood. If they had been married. How those same arms and lips would welcome her into bed each night, holding her just as Hans had done when she'd come to him for comfort not long ago.

Remnants of the day and of the admiral trickled away as Elsa rose from the tub, water rippling down her fragrant frame as she wrung out her hair and reached for her robe.

She toweled off the remaining water from her thick mane and began to brush it in front of a massive vanity when her robe slipped open a bit, exposing the v of her alluring cleavage. Just the inner curves of the generous mounds.

With her body free of its usual dusting of ice and rosy pink from soaking up the water's fervent heat, her skin had more of a peachy undertone to it. Soft. Supple. Youthfully firm. Elsa wasn't one to be vain, but she was apt enough to know that she was aesthetically blessed. Not just the most powerful woman in all of Arendelle but the most beautiful as well, rivaled only by Anna.

The silk robe slid seductively lower over her shoulder, piquing her curiosity as she imagined Hans seeing her reveal herself to him like this. Showing him the woman she'd grown into, having left the gangly teenager behind. The thought alone accelerated her breathing, excitement and desire whipping through her like a wild breeze. With one pull of the belt, the robe fell to the floor, forgotten as Elsa admired her naked self from an entirely different, more _mature,_ perspective.

She saw her body nude all the time, and, in private, was never concerned with modesty. Yet, as she gazed upon herself through the eyes of her desired beholder, she marveled at how feminine and womanly she'd become since she last took a good look at her body.

Pleasantly full breasts and a slender rib cage sloped down into a flat stomach, an alabaster plane of angelic perfection. Tone, taunt, and sumptuously lined by well-defined muscles, Elsa languidly caressed the beauty of her torso as if discovering unexplored land. Imagining her hands as his. Entranced by the softness of each fingertip and transported to a new dimension of sensual excitement as her nerves crackled to life.

It wasn't just the longing for intimate physical touch. It was the knowledge that Hans had dreamt about and waited for the day that he could savor the brilliance of her body. He'd never seen her bare; and, at one point in time, her body had been meant for his eyes only. He loved her, then and now, and there was something incredibly thrilling about combining those kinds of highly charged emotions with the final frontier of physical pleasure.

Her thighs pressed together, trying and failing to quell the rush of arousal between them, only to force a throb that made her cry _Hans_ inside of her head like the escape of billowing steam. She had to bite her lower lip to suppress the urge to say it out loud.

And then her heart sank, yanked back into reality as she cast a displeased gaze back to her reflection. She didn't feel beautiful anymore, just disappointed that she had sunk this deep into the quagmire of fantasy and hadn't caught herself in time. The love she felt for Hans was already strong, dormant for a period of time, but never entirely forgotten. Now she could see the desperation glinting in her eyes. How, if he had been right there with her, there would have been no stopping herself.

It frightened Elsa to know that she was becoming a woman who held the attention of two separate men. Both appealing to different sides of herself and neither really convincing her which was real love. She spun away from the mirror, too ashamed to continue on as she had been.

 _What am I doing?_

Henrik was bound to pull into port in the morning, and here she was fondling herself to Hans. Then she remembered Anna's words about weaving a web she might not be able to get out of. But telling herself to stop thinking about Hans was as good as "conceal, don't feel." It never worked, and it only made it more difficult to not think about him.

* * *

After a night of scolding herself and then dreaming about Hans, again, Elsa took a deep breath as she came to her senses and obediently waited for Henrik to disembark from his ship, assuming the statuesque stance of the regal Queen he would be expecting.

Normally when Henrik returned from his travels, he'd pull her close and give Elsa quick kiss before they returned inside to hear about his adventures over a pot of hot tea and a platter of finger foods.

However, this time, he practically galloped down the gangplank and swept Elsa up into his arms, eliciting a gasp and shockingly wide smile from her as he twirled around and gently set her back down on her feet.

"What-I don't even... what is all this?" Interrupting herself once she saw the ridiculous number of trunks being unloaded from the cargo area of the ship. Far more than he had left with.

"Gifts!" Henrik gushed and held her petite hands tightly in his, unrecognizable gaiety dancing across his exuberant face. "Dozens of gifts for my queen."

As soon as the trunks were placed in his room, Henrik rushed Elsa back into the castle, chomping at the bit to bowl her over with the extravagant treasures he'd brought back for her.

"I bought this for you, amongst many other things," handing her a small but elegantly wrapped box. "I couldn't stop thinking about you the whole time I was away. I could have filled three more trunks if my brothers hadn't yanked me away from the marketplace."

"That's so kind, but you shouldn't have," trying to be as modest as she could, but thinking that bringing her back gifts didn't make up for the time apart.

"Nonsense," Henrik insisted. "You deserve much more. Please," motioning to the box for her to open.

Elsa untied the gold satin ribbon and lifted off the top to find a gorgeous purple silk scarf.

"Oh, Henrik," she gasped. "It's beautiful." The sumptuous fabric slid between her hands as Elsa unfolded the panels of the scarf in awe.

"There were so many beautiful colors, and I almost got blue. But purple is the color of royalty. So I figured it suited you best."

She was flattered beyond belief, almost stunned speechless by his grand gesture. Henrik finally seemed to be coming around to her demands for a more serious commitment, and it appeared as though absence had made his heart grown fonder.

Henrik took the scarf from Elsa as she turned to face a full-length mirror. "I'd love to see you wear it sometime," he murmured softly, a smile toying with his lips.

"I'm sure I can find something just as lovely to go with it," Elsa replied innocently enough, until she saw Henrik's eyes darken slightly in his reflection.

"I meant wearing _only_ this," his words prickling her skin with an unmistakable desire she never knew he was capable of possessing. Henrik fanned the fabric over her chest, forming it to her torso and bust line, more like a corset than something meant to wear around the neck, when Elsa's mouth dropped in surprise.

" _Oh_ ," she realized, rapidly batting her eyes. He wanted to see her _naked_. Probably even thought about it while he was away. Apparently absence really _had_ made the heart grown fonder. And more daring as well.

Before Elsa could process what this sudden advance even meant for the two of them, Henrik spun her back around to face him, holding her firmly in his arms with a dire look etched on his features.

"I've been a fool, my love. I've had you here this whole time, and although I care for you very much, I didn't understand just _how_ much until I was away from you for so long."

Elsa was utterly gobsmacked, with saucer-wide eyes and trembling lips that parted like a fish struggling to breath out of water. "Henrik I-"

"You've been asking me for more," holding her tighter, "Not outright, but I know Anna echoes the truth you speak to her. And I want to give it to you. I'm old enough to have already started a family by now. Truth is, I've been afraid to settle down and get married. Have children. I want that with you though. I was wrong to put my leisurely pursuits before you and I; Anna showed me that. Please forgive me, my darling."

With his lips just a breath away from hers, Elsa wasn't exactly sure what to say. And she would have been lying to herself if she didn't admit he just said what she'd been longing to hear from him.

"You want that with me?" Her perfectly sculpted brows knitting at her question. "Marriage and a family? What changed?" Elsa demanded softly, but with the threat of anger piercing her tone. His revelation was welcomed, but the timing wasn't exactly great.

"I told you. I wasn't ready, but now I think I am. On the trip, my brothers all went to town and found ladies at the taverns to take company with. I stayed behind and thought of you. I remember thinking how the stars in the sky reminded me of the ice sparkling on your gown. How the majestic waters of Greece held the same blue as your gorgeous eyes. I don't usually think that way. This isn't a marriage proposal. Not now anyway, but I want you to know that I want to take that next step with you, soon."

"Soon, but not now," just simply clarifying. Like there was some good reason for him to keep her waiting even longer.

"Soon," he promised with a curling smile. "Let me woo you. Show you how much I love you so that when I do ask you, you'll know I mean it." He didn't allow her to say anything more and kissed her, gently at first and then harder as the scarf slipped off her frame and onto the floor between them.

Commitment, a promise, and the devotion Elsa had been wanting to gain from Henrik. All in the palm of her hand. But still no fire when he pressed his lips to hers. He said he loved her, so that couldn't be the problem. She cared for him, could even see them getting married maybe, but instantly started to doubt if she was capable of love. Or what that even was anymore. There had to be something wrong with her. She knew it then.

* * *

The mouth of the fjord was so small, it hardly allowed for many trajectory points from which to launch an attack. Hans was methodically crouched over a map spread out across a large table in an office Elsa had set aside for his use. Models of ships covered the parchment as Hans struggled to maneuver them into a successful formation.

"Playing with your toys?" A welcomed voice called from the doorway where Elsa was perched asymmetrically against the frame. Hip jutted out to one side, arms crossed, with a smirk twisted about her lips. A look that could kill from the heat it provoked. Though Hans knew that was just Elsa's normal expression of playfulness and not meant to be as sexual as it came off.

"Playing with my toys _and_ saving your kingdom," meeting her with a smirk of his own. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm not exactly sure, but here I am nonetheless."

"Want to watch me work? Sounds like you're bored. Though I can't imagine your schedule even allows for such a thing."

Elsa floated across the room and sat in a wing chair near the table, legs elegantly crossed with her dress temptingly draped over them in such a way that made Hans want to know what the rest of her bare thigh looked like beneath the sheet of icy clothing.

She watched him diligently survey the swirling currents of the North Sea just beyond the opening channel to the kingdom, eyes flicking back and forth between his ships' positions and the fascinated blonde just off to the side.

"Tell me something about yourself that I don't know already. Something you've learned since you became queen."

Sapphire eyes rose to the rafters of the room as she thought about a question no one had ever bothered to ask her before. "I love to dance," evoking a captivating smile from Hans from the way she brightened at her own reply. "I don't get to do as much of it as I'd like, but it's everything I thought it'd be. Sometimes even more."

"You're a natural," Hans exclaimed. "Light on your feet. You've got rhythm, musicality, grace. Though based on my experience, your ending needs a little work," smirking playfully in her direction. "Running out on your partner isn't exactly how one completes a waltz." As embarrassed as she was, Elsa possessed a sense of humor that allowed her to at least laugh at herself.

"I'm sorry about that. We'll have to try again sometime," more of a promise than a suggestion. "What about you? What do you love about the navy?"

"The freedom," he replied without needing much time to reflect. "It's a beautiful feeling to wake up just as the sun is rising, every line of the horizon radiating with that gorgeous orange. And when you're out far enough, there's nothing but you and endless stretches of blue for as far as the eye can see. Away from all your troubles. With a profound sense of quiet that lets you really get in touch with yourself. It's a wonderful feeling."

Elsa rested her head against her fist as she listened with an easy smile, whisked away to the celestial image he'd drawn with his words.

"I think I can relate." Elsa had never been out to sea, but a towering castle surrounded by peaked white mountains had provided the freedom and solitude to which Hans was referring. An escape from the hardships of life. "What else do you love about it?"

Hans chuckled and moved to the other side of the desk. "You're really that interested?"

"Yes," making herself comfortable to hear more.

"The pride," he said more seriously. "I've never really been good at anything. Never had to earn respect. And I have. My men listen to me. My people are finally starting to see me for who I really am and not for my misfortune or my mistakes. I can look at myself and feel pleased with who I've become. Well, almost. We all have our bad days," his genuineness shining through the dark clouds of his past.

"Yes, we do."

There was a collective silence as they both enjoyed the pleasant chord they'd struck with their candidness.

"The fjord is such a small tactical area. I honestly think you'd be much better off building batteries up in the hills. A canon would have a clean shot from that distance. And no one would see it coming."

"It's brilliant," Elsa declared and delicately laid her hands in her lap. "I'll propose it next meeting."

"That easily?"

"It's a good idea. Why not?" Hans shrugged and went back to his map, brows pinched in concentration as Elsa rested her elbow on the arm of the chair and played with the tip of her finger in her mouth. Watching him. Studying him. Amazed at how they were now able to be in the same room and just enjoy each other's company.

Hans' hand brushed over the shoreline of Arendelle, coastal blue meeting the dense green of land as his thumb traced along.

"Carved by glaciers," he mumbled to himself, imagining the staggering cliffs of the fjord in his mind. "Only nature can create such beauty."

Elsa stopped and dropped her hand into her lap, making a thud that made Hans glance up at her.

"What?" He asked, unsure of if he'd done something wrong.

"My father used to say that all the time. About the land. He loved its beauty." Her eyes fell to her hands, and she gripped them tightly together, one over the other as a throb of sadness echoed in her heart. It made Hans ache for the loss that still affected her so greatly.

"He was a good man."

Elsa nodded and smiled at the memory of the man who had tried to help her the best he could. "He liked you," she murmured affectionately, sapphire orbs meeting his sympathetic gaze.

"I know," Hans replied fondly, proud to have been in the late king's favor. So much more rewarding than his relationship with his own father.

"He used to tell me how lucky I was to have someone who cared for me the way you did. He was excited about what kind of leaders we'd become. Together." The loss of her father was one thing, but the reminder of what had crumbled between her and Hans, with him right in front of her, tormented by a situation she never would have found herself in if things had worked out, made her feel even worse.

"It'll get easier. I promise."

"What will get easier?" Elsa asked.

"The loss, of us. I feel it too. It hurts so bad I want to do everything in my power to change it, but I can't. I'm not going to hunt you down when you're spoken for." Since Henrik's return, he'd seen even less of Elsa. But no matter how much Hans wanted to reclaim what fate had robbed them of, he was gentleman enough to win her properly.

"Can I show you something?" Elsa asked, growing more melancholic by the moment as her dress grew a shade darker.

"Anything."

Elsa strode over to Hans and reached for his wrist, undid the golden buttons on the cuff, and then proceeded to roll it up past his elbow. She took her index finger, delicate and thin, and placed it in his upturned palm. He had no idea what she had planned, but he didn't flinch, trusting her completely. Her finger began a slow path up the inner stretch of his forearm, ribbons of frost branching and curling out in a fluid dance across his skin, veins of blue embellished with the crystalline glaze of her signature snowflakes.

"It's beautiful. The shapes always remind me of you."

"Be honest," because she already knew the answer. "Is it cold?"

"It's freezing. _Biting_." His spine wriggled as the piercing frost ascended towards his elbow.

Her hand left the smoothness of his skin and lazily traced over his chest, coating his shirt because she wasn't watching her work. She was swimming in green orbs.

"That's what it feels like for me. In my heart. It's cold. So cold I wonder if somehow I've frozen my own heart. It's unbearable."

"Oh, Elsa."

She reached down for his other hand and brought it to her chest, right over where her heart was beating below the winter white flesh.

"Except when I'm with you. It's warm. Burns even sometimes. There's a fire. I can feel it in my veins. Bringing me to life." She was tearing now. "Why is that?" She shuddered. "I've never felt anything like it except for with my family. But this is different. What's wrong with me?"

"Nothing's wrong with you," grabbing her by the shoulders. "Elsa, you're a complex woman. With a much deeper range of emotions than most." His attempts to comfort her rolled over her like water off a duck's back, and she shook her head in sullen protest. "What makes you think there's something wrong with you?" Touching his forehead to hers.

"Because I'm torn in the most unimaginable way. It's testing my strength, and I don't think I have the will to fight it."

He cupped a hand around her cheek, unknowingly making her struggle only worse. "Fight what? What it is you want?"

"You."

"You will always have me, Elsa. No matter what," he promised, steadfast and true.

Elsa's eyes flicked down to where she was now holding his hands, and when she looked back up at him, there was a hunger in those glacier irises. Subtle and timid, but perfectly reflecting his own need to be closer to her. A seal of ice filled the cracks of the door and froze the lock solid. Out of the corner of Hans' eye he could see a thick layer of frost furcating over the gabled windows of the room, shrouding them in privacy.

Elsa's breath hitched as she raised his hand to her neck. "Touch me," she whispered breathlessly into the scarce distance between them.

Touch was such a simple thing that most people took for granted. What was usually a given in life was something Elsa had only recently been free to experience after such a long absence from physical human contact. Even in their finest hour, Hans' hands had been covered in gloves, and Elsa was dressed entirely from the neck down. The day in the garden was the first time he laid a bare hand to her cheek. And the other night, she'd relished the warmth of his strappingly naked chest.

The trail he was leading over the sender curves of her clavicle was a procession of electricity. Jolts of sensation and pleasure sparking her skin to the point where she nearly stopped breathing. He followed the smooth bone to the cap of her shoulder, uncovered and with tiny rainbows glittering on the area from the prisms her ice crystals projected from the sleeve of the dress.

Touch wasn't enough for Hans, and he placed a tiny kiss to the ivory surface, eliciting a hard swallow from Her Majesty.

"Getting warmer?" He asked in a sinfully deep voice that tickled her spine with excitement.

"Scorching," she heaved helplessly. All remaining willpower dissipating as her cravings soared to newfound heights.

Even though she wore more revealing clothing nowadays, it was still too much for Hans. The scaled detailing of her bodice felt like glassy chips of ice beneath his fingertips, cool and sensuously divine, just like its creator.

When his hand cruised over her dress for what Elsa felt was too long, not paying enough attention to the uncovered areas, she grasped his hand in hers and slowly, _tantalizingly_ , raised it from the flat of her stomach up to her contracting rib cage. Refusing to stop until Hans understood that she wanted him to touch her someplace more salacious. Because to come this far after so long, her body kept pleading for a deeper connection. They could feel the rush pulsing through their veins, urging and longing for a chance for something beyond simple kissing.

Elsa's hand left Hans' as she invitingly arched her chest out, heaving with excitement and anticipation. Hans hesitated, worried about what kind of a rabbit hole they were about to plunge down.

His hand resumed its course and ran over the beveled bodice until his hand held her entire breast, the needy cry that left her lips awakening a primal urge within him. He didn't care anymore about anyone who stood in his way or what this would mean later. Hans had learned to live in the present because such rare opportunities were fleeting. And he wasn't about to let this one slip away from him.

"Hans," she breathed erratically, destroying his last shred of hesitation as he swiftly picked her up and set her on the desk behind him.

Their lips crashed together, and Elsa sighed right away, relief washing over her as they unlocked the fury of their love. He kissed her deeper with each adjustment of their mouths, sucking the air from her lungs and leaving her truly breathless and thunderstruck with lust.

His hand on her breast was euphoria, but she wanted to allow him more of her. As they continued to kiss, Elsa guided Hans' hand to that exposed part of her thigh he'd been eyeing earlier, not entirely sure what she wanted but knowing that she had to find out how it would make her feel. How it would make _him_ feel. He started at her knee, boney and rhythmically rubbing against his hip. Then he reached the smooth stretch of skin hidden below the dress, her head tilting back as a soft moan left her lips. Hans ventured further, until it dawned on him that he was about to touch her in a way that would start a wildfire he'd regret with all his heart.

With sadness filling his eyes, Hans reluctantly pulled away.

"What's wrong?" She fretted. "It's me, isn't it?"

His hand caressed the translucent freckles on the apple of her cheek. "No, it's not you. I want this. More than anything. But not this way. I love you too much to let things unfold like this. C'mere," helping her stand as he stood at the end of the desk and framed her face with both of his hands. "I understand the urge. It's mutual, believe me. But I always dreamed of you as mine. Finally getting to be with you and calling you my wife. My bride. Where our love wasn't behind frozen windows and doors. It was free."

Elsa lowered her eyes to the floor and nodded. He had the strength to say what she couldn't remember long enough to restrain herself. So in some strange way, she was thankful, and yet, devastated at the same time.

"I just think you have some thinking to do, and there's no rush. I would never put that on you." He lifted her chin up towards him and kissed her, soft and lingering. Because while Hans was the wiser of the two at the moment, he knew that if he was going to give her time to think things over, he was going to leave things between them on a high note.

He spared her the awkwardness of leaving, so he did. It was her castle, and she probably needed a moment to gather herself before returning to the day's busy schedule.

With a wave of her hand, she defrosted the door as Hans turned back to wink at her before slipping out into the hallway. He was right. Using her head instead of just following her heart for a while was probably best. Something was holding her back, and she wasn't able to pinpoint exactly what it was.

* * *

While Hans may have left the office with his dignity still intact, it wasn't more than a few nights later that he found himself drowning his sorrows in a foaming pint of pilsner at a local tavern. He missed Elsa terribly, the frost on the glass acting like salt in his wounds as he etched little swirls and snowflakes into it with his fingernail. It almost made him regret that he hadn't asked her to show off her powers more when they were together. He loved them, just as much as he loved her because they were special and unique. Just like Elsa.

"Good evening, Admiral," a rather cocky voice shot down to Hans in his seat. He was sneering before he even looked up and didn't regret his reaction when he saw it was Henrik, smile peeking out from behind his ridiculous mustache.

"I'm fairly sure we have absolutely no business to discuss," Hans mustered as politely as he could and slugged back another gulp of his brew.

"You're right. This isn't about business; this is about pleasure." Well that had Hans' attention. More out of absurdity than curiosity. "This is Ida," he announced as a smiling young woman stepped out from behind Henrik. "She'd... like to keep you company this evening. Anything you like. She's here to please."

The fire raging out of Hans' steely gaze wasn't enough to shut the older man up. "She's blonde," Henrik added. "I assume that's your type."

It took Hans' entire royal upbringing to keep himself calm and not punch the man right then and there. "What exactly do you think you're doing?" He spat.

"Keeping your intentions pure, and your attention away from what's mine," Henrik replied with a smug smile plastered on his face.

"What's _yours_? I wouldn't even dare to suggest that Elsa belonged to anyone other than herself, but to suggest that the Queen is somehow your property is extremely bold. And foolish," erasing the gloating smile off the other man's face.

"You think you know her, but not like I do. While you've been gone, I've been here. You're no longer a prince, and you have the nerve to approach her. It's shameful."

Hans lost his title the week he returned from Arendelle, never to regain it. Without knowing the full story, the people of the Southern Isles demanded punishment and no longer wanted Hans as their prince. It had never bothered Hans as much as it did just then, thrown in his face like a dirty dishrag meant to humiliate him by another person who judged before knowing.

"I may not have my title, but her father hand-selected me to be her husband. Can you say that?"

Henrik chuckled at Hans as though he were dealing with a child, unworthy to even grace Hans with his dignified presence. "You were chosen for your age and political matters. Don't flatter yourself."

"In the beginning, yes. But I can't tell you the number of times he told me how delighted he was to have Elsa as my betrothed. I held his favor. You never have. I'm pretty sure he wouldn't appreciate a man ten years her senior preying on her like a lamb."

"Held his favor?" Henrik mocked with a deep laugh that made Hans scowl in return. "You tried to kill his daughter. I'm certain no king, or father, would condone such an action." There was nothing Hans could say to that, and he hated the way the truth shackled his ability to defend himself. "Stay away from her. I need only to warn you once."

Henrik turned on the heel of his boot and left Hans to nurse his wounds at the bar. The temptation to feel sorry for himself was right at the tip of Hans' fingers. Self-pity would have been easy to embrace. To think of what Agdar would have thought about what he'd done to Elsa cut him deeply. But it was the result of a series of terrible events, most of which had been out of his control.

As he held the sweaty mug in his hand, he stared at himself in the reflection of the glassy surface of his pilsner and felt something fiery bloom inside of him. Like a warrior who had just heard his call to battle. He'd been a gentleman and stopped Elsa's advances towards him, choosing to do things the right way. Now he knew he couldn't stop. He couldn't stop her or himself. He was going to fight for her, win her. Because after everything they'd been through, he wasn't going to come this far only to let her slip from his grasp again. It was a challenge that Henrik had thrown down, and Hans accepted it wholeheartedly, guided by his love for Elsa and the unshakeable ability to keep coming back when life knocked him down.

* * *

 _I was sick last week, so I'm doing my best to catch up on replying to reviews. I promise this isn't a fic that's going to be me shoving an OC down everyone's throat. There is soooooo much more Helsa to come :)_

 _Have an awesome weekend everyone!_


	12. Midnight Rendezvous

_Just an update. This story will be continued on AO3 only from now on. This cuts down on the anon hate and, while it's not my favorite format, keeps the story going despite ship haters._

 _For this chapter, keep in mind that this is meant to lead up to a bunch of big plot points coming in the next chapter. So while it may seem a little fluffy, it's all leading to something :) Enjoy!_

* * *

It was still dark outside when Elsa awoke, just the smallest hint of dawn blossoming into an ebony sky over the slumbering kingdom. A long day ahead meant an early rise for the queen, so it was no surprise that Elsa was stunned to see Henrik outside her door waiting to accompany her to breakfast at the first ray of light.

"For you, my dear," Henrik honeyed brightly and presented Elsa with a bouquet of purple crocuses from behind his back. She was overjoyed at the flowers but was a little miffed that he'd brought her crocuses. The crocus was the official flower of Arendelle and plastered on every standard and tapestry in the kingdom, but that didn't mean it was her _favorite_ flower.

"Henrik…" Elsa floundered and began to lead them down the hallway to distract him as she carefully chose her words. "These are beautiful first of all. Thank you," giving him a peck on the cheek. "But I think if we want to move to the next level, as you called it, I should be honest with you."

Henrik stopped halfway down the spiraled stairs and waited on bated breath for Elsa to finish.

"My favorite flowers are reinroses. I could easily see how you thought crocuses might be but… I just had to tell you."

"Reinroses," he mused, as if cataloging the information into his mental file. "I won't forget it."

* * *

A day out in the kingdom required Elsa to make sure she ate a hearty breakfast before leaving the castle, but she kept getting distracted by Kristian's adorable babbling and Henrik's continued outpouring of attention. He desperately wanted to accompany her about her day, but Elsa wasn't ready to make such appearances as a couple while working. That implied a situation to which she hadn't yet committed.

First on the agenda was a progress report and inspection of the new shipping and receiving area in the harbor. Thanks to her enchanting personality and quick-witted political prowess, Elsa had made Arendelle a busy port with so many goods being exchanged these days that it had outgrown itself. A bigger and better port was the only way to accommodate the jump in industry.

The rest of the morning was spent overseeing the refurbishment of the theatre at the center of the village. It had been in dire need of updating for some years, and the arts were near and dear to Elsa's heart. She wanted to see more plays, more children's choirs, and, of course, dancing. A larger stage and adequate lighting would make the theatre a place to gather and celebrate the creative spirit of the kingdom, and Elsa couldn't wait for the project to be completed by the following spring.

Whenever Elsa made her way about town, people always lined the streets to see her and relish in their queen taking such good care of their well-being. What some saw as undignified or even blasphemous for a royal, behaving so casually and approachably with her people, Elsa saw as being open-hearted and a hands-on ruler. Even Henrik found it odd that she personally walked the streets of her kingdom and spoke so candidly with the villagers about their troubles. He felt like that was what holding court was for, and it was another's job to do the legwork. Not a queen's.

Elsa had been an unconventional ruler from the start, no matter how Henrik felt. No other monarch possessed her powers, but they also didn't wear their hearts on their sleeves like Elsa did. It was the reason why she let the visitors of any ranking stay in the castle, not just other royals or dignitaries. She and Anna were the same that way. Arendelle was theirs to protect and to nurture, and Elsa's blood pumped vigorously for the job she was born to do.

"Your Majesty," a page from the castle interrupted as Elsa visited the home of an elderly woman too disabled to attend court. "The officers of the Southern Isles would like to know if they could use the Great Hall for fencing practice. Since you're out of the castle today."

"That's fine. Let them have as much time as they'd like," she replied kindly and returned her attention to the old woman.

"Admiral Westergard thanks you in advance, my lady."

 _Admiral Westergard_. There was that name and title again that tickled her ear and percolated her interest like some bewitching melody. Sparking that instant charge of electricity under her skin that breathed new life into her day. The idea of Hans with a sword in his hands should _not_ have intrigued Elsa as much as it did, given their terrible past, but she'd always had a fondness for watching men fence and bit her lip at the thought of him working up a sweat.

After speeding up the rest of her schedule, Elsa returned back to the castle for a short break and to check up on Anna, but not before she passed by the Great Hall and discreetly snuck a peek inside. There were dozens of men from both kingdoms, but it didn't take long to find Hans because he was one of a handful of men with his shirt off. The bitter reminder of his father's cruelty splotched across his torso only deepened her guilt momentarily before the glistening sheen of sweat glazed across his muscles seized her undivided attention like a girl in a candy shop. The glimpse of his body when Hans first revealed his scars had been brief, and in an entirely different context. The handsome man now displaying his fancy footwork was primal, a fierce carnality that stole Elsa's breath as she marveled at his advance towards his opponent with unparalleled precision.

Hans' sparring partner stopped once he saw the queen, immediately crossing his hand over his chest and dipping his chin, but Elsa hardly noticed. Her mouth was still agape when Hans' eyes caught hers, flashing a cheeky grin as he waved. Elsa shyly waved back, a bit dazed from the heaving she was witnessing as Hans tried to catch his breath and combed his sodden hair over the crown of his head. Her bashfulness of being discovered was endearing to him, bright red cheeks and a docile smile peering out from behind the door as if she'd been caught with her hand in the cookie jar.

Hans was dashingly handsome, she'd always been sure of that. The time apart that Hans had enforced on them to give her space to think made Elsa realize that enticing looks and the burning desire he set aflame inside her weren't the only things she needed from him. As much as watching him fight was proving to be a powerful aphrodisiac, something heavy continued to weigh on her heart. She was a woman of reason, and their past continued to loom over her.

Elsa pried herself away from the door and braced herself to head back out into town to resume her day's work. On the way out, she passed Henrik, of all people, who asked about the hint of disappointment pressing her lips into a thin line. He knew her well enough by now to know that arms folded over her midsection wasn't a good sign. However, Elsa insisted that everything was fine and that she was just fretting over some of the reports about the water supply in the higher regions of the kingdom. A lie, and they both knew it.

Keeping secrets was something Elsa hoped she wouldn't have to do anymore, but there was no other to way to squelch the battle of mind versus heart that was beginning to consume her every waking minute of the day.

* * *

Time alone with Elsa became scarce for Hans after Henrik returned, aside from their brief run-in during his fencing practice. The blonde-haired prince was usually by her side whenever he got the chance, and suddenly Hans' schedule had mysteriously become jam-packed with events that didn't include the queen. It was only when he asked Kai to arrange a private meeting concerning tactical matters that Hans was able to snag some coveted time with her.

Elsa was busy diligently arranging some papers on her desk, order and cleanliness always at the forefront of her mind, when the unmistakable knock from the admiral came upon her door, forcing her to swallow back the thunderbolt of excitement that shot through her body the minute she heard it.

Hans' smooth swagger captivated her attention as he strode across the room and straight to the reserved blonde. She was smiling but didn't do much more than elegantly place herself beside her desk to grace him with her presence. That was until Hans bowed and gallantly took one of her hands, flawless and delicate, and chastely kissed the cool rise of her knuckle, steadfast eyes never leaving cerulean blue for even a second.

"Your Majesty," he greeted respectfully with a smile so smooth that it surely held less innocent intentions behind it and received nothing more than the arch of a brow from the sassy monarch. She was displeased with his initial, and far too modest, attempt so Hans brought himself upright and leaned in to cordially kiss Elsa on her cheek. Still holding everything back and keeping his affections as restrained as possible.

Elsa remained stoically silent and narrowed her gaze on Hans, the corner of her mouth twitching into an anticipatory smile as her eyes filled with subtle want. It was so hard for the both of them to behave around each other. Hans couldn't help but chuckle as he brazened his efforts and amorously held her chin up to him to place a tender, heartfelt kiss to her crimson lips. Elsa's eyes slowly fluttered open as Hans pulled away and admired the effect he'd had on her. Just a simple kiss, but it had her blushing red enough to match the velvet curtains framing the triangular windows of her study.

"Admiral," Elsa returned at last, husky and coy now that she had received the kind of doting she'd expected. "To what do I owe the pleasure?" Slipping back behind her desk and assuming a rather authoritative air about herself. Her ability to convey such confidence and sexuality -sitting with her hands folded neatly in her lap with her dress purposely exposing the entire length of her crossed legs- always made it difficult for Hans to focus on his task.

He was there to discuss _some_ business, but no doubt he was also on a mission to win the heart of his love before another stole his last chance away. Coming on too strong wasn't the answer because Henrik was already bombarding her with attention and gifts. If Elsa loved Hans, _really_ loved him, all he had to do was be his honest self. And so he was.

"The Rock of Måløy has proven to be a fantastic area to pull off surprise attacks on incoming ships, but the area would serve a better purpose if the waters to the north were available for military use as well."

Some men read poetry to their lovers. Others used every metaphor known to man to describe their beauty and whip them into a frenzy. For Elsa, it was listening to Hans discuss military action that brought her to the edge of swooning. It always made her think of him commanding his crew on the ship that day she saved him on the fjord. It was something Henrik didn't have. As sweet as he was, he was second in line to the throne of Nørdmore and possessed more of an intellectual charisma, which Hans also had, but Henrik wasn't a born leader like the former prince. Hans had power, strength, eloquence, wit, and a brilliant sense of leadership that always managed to spur Elsa's fascination with him.

"And you need the kingdom of Vestmar's permission?" Keeping her mind on the subject at hand quite well despite Hans' unfurling smile and the kaleidoscope of butterflies swirling about her stomach.

"Exactly. I need your diplomatic skills to gain access to their waters."

"I'll personally write the duke a letter this afternoon. It shouldn't be a problem."

With that out of the way, the tension in both of their bodies relaxed as they just enjoyed each other's company behind closed doors again. Though Elsa behaved herself this time and stayed put in her chair.

"I haven't seen you in a while," Hans lamented, breaking the silence. "What have you been up to?" Flashing her those vibrant green eyes of his.

"Thinking," she retorted fervently. "Isn't that what I'm supposed to be doing?"

Hans chuckled to himself, his words now wreaking of irony now that Henrik had reinforced himself as Elsa's rightful beholder.

"Thinking _and_ spying on me while I'm fencing?" He teased as his grin crept wider.

" _Spying_?" She cut playfully. "You lured me there by having a page come ask me for permission."

"I asked for permission, I didn't say you had to come watch. You did that on your own," bouncing his brows at her as a small laugh escaped through his kissably soft lips. He could tell he was pressing her buttons, but it was done in the security of their relationship, however they were defining that now.

"You want me to stay away and think, but then you shirtlessly tempt me with your athleticism?" Her tone shifting more towards frustration. "That's cruel." And she was serious now, hands balled in her lap with a pout forming on her angelic face.

"I want what's best for you."

"Doesn't everyone?" Elsa interrupted, infuriated that others were always telling her what she _should_ do even though she was a grown woman and Queen.

"You know, for twenty-one years, you did what everyone told you to do. And you were miserable. For the few hours you were alone without rules, you created the most amazing and majestic creations I've ever seen in my life. Why should I be one more person to hold you back when you're so happy being free?" Moved by his observation, Elsa didn't reply at first and just let his sincerity wash over her. "I meant it when I said I still loved you. Now more than ever. I just don't want you to get hurt." She nodded at that.

"You were right to force some space between us," Elsa admitted. "It doesn't stop me from thinking about you but… I should be honest. It's only fair." Hans waited as Elsa drew in a long breath, sadness escaping when she exhaled. "I can't offer more than this right now. To anyone." That included Henrik. "I've loved you my whole life, and that may never change. But I'm not about to throw someone I care about out of my life after a five month courtship either."

Hans nodded this time, head heavy with his lips turning down as his eyes sank to the floor. Elsa was a woman of honor, and he had to respect that.

"More than this?" He questioned bemusedly. _Hopefully_.

"More than what we've been doing, I suppose. A commitment to be more precise."

"But not cutting everything off completely?"

"It's as you said. I'm not very good at putting restrictions on myself. Having done so for so many years, I just _can't_. It's not how I hoped things would be for us, or anyone for that matter, but I don't want to lose either pursuit."

Hans remembered a captain once telling him that all was fair in love and war during one of his first battles when their ship was ambushed. There was pain and victory in both, and nothing was ever promised. His eyes panned up from the wooden floor to Elsa's desk until he held her gaze. Her eyes were unwavering and yet nakedly raw with honesty. They were at an impasse.

"I never thought I'd get another chance to see you again, let alone rekindle what we had. The summer will be over soon, and I'll have to return home." Both of their hearts plummeted at that morbid reminder. "Whatever you decide, if I only have this one chance and nothing more, I can live out the rest of my days in peace. Memories are forever after all."

"That seems so cruel of me and not fair to you at all. You can't be happy with that," Elsa argued even though she knew she would crumble if he revoked his love completely.

"Do you still love me?"

"Yes," she answered promptly.

"Do you want what we have over nothing at all?"

"Yes."

"Would you meet me in the Great Hall tonight after everyone has gone to sleep?"

"What?"

" _Would_ you?" Daring her further without hesitation.

"Yes, I would."

"Then I'll see you tonight. No regrets." And he left before she could talk herself out of it.

* * *

The summer moon beamed down like a beacon through the windows of the Great Hall. The gold trim of the massive entrance and chandeliers flickered with decadence amidst the shadows of the room as Elsa pushed open the heavy wooden door with a squeak to find Hans patiently waiting at the center like something out of a dream.

She was dressed in nothing but her slippers and nightgown, long sleeved and length skimming the floor in a shade Hans ultimately decided was light green, not teal as he first assumed. It covered more skin than he was accustomed to, but he adored it just the same. The Fair Isle stitching across the bodice and hem were reflective of Arendelle's more traditional clothing. Complete with a high collar, it left everything to the imagination and gave Elsa an almost childlike appearance.

Hans hadn't bothered changing his clothes and simply removed his coat for the occasion, greeting Elsa in a dress shirt and skin-tight black trousers and making her feel slightly underdressed for their rendezvous, but she could tell by the gleaming expression on his face that her nightgown was more than adequate. Refreshing even from the slinky blue dress made of ice that she constantly donned. Only this outfit didn't give her emotions away like the other did, and Hans was on his own to decipher her mood.

"What do you have planned this evening?" Elsa asked quietly as she tiptoed across the floor towards Hans.

"I had wanted to take you sailing out on the fjord. But seeing as how that wouldn't work with prying eyes and all, I thought some dancing was in order," gesturing with a wave of his hand to the wide open floor of the room and an obviously proud smile pulling across his lips.

"We don't have any music," Elsa bubbled demurely.

"We don't need any. You love numbers. Just count the steps in your head. You did promise me a proper ending after last time, remember?"

A chance at her redemption from their prior dance was definitely in order, and even thought she was in her sleepwear and there were no musicians or chatter filling the emptiness, Elsa was profoundly touched that Hans created a midnight fantasy just for her. He had remembered how she said dancing was one of her favorite things she'd discovered about herself, and there before her was the perfect partner waiting to literally sweep her off her feet.

It was something out of those fictional novels Anna was always encouraging Elsa to read. Something at which she may have previously rolled her eyes but was now immersed in- a world of romance. Completely taken with the admiral of her fleet.

Hans bowed and offered a hand to his pajama-clad partner. "A waltz, my queen?"

"Please," accepting his offer wholeheartedly.

Their beginning was a little awkward at first, with the lack of a crowd buzzing around them and the deafening silence of the Great Hall. But as soon as their hands met and their bodies came into a close hold, all was forgotten and the beating of their hearts became the metronome to their rhythm.

It wasn't long before Elsa was beaming, laughter bubbling over like an unwatched pot the more elaborate Hans became with his impressive moves. Elsa was so nymph-like that she hardly constituted any weight. Hans didn't hold himself back and lifted her by her hips into the air as he spun her once around, exuding the feeling that she was the driving force of every shred of happiness in his life.

The overjoyed queen gasped with delight because she'd never had someone who danced with her like that. Vivacious giggles mellowed into quiet moans of joy as Hans bent her back over his arm for a dramatic dip, vertebrae by vertebrae arching like a languid feline stretching in the sun until the ends of her hair brushed the smooth marble floor. A move so bold that it ignited that want that Elsa had been trying to stifle ever since Hans had told her to _think_.

Having known Hans forever, it was clear why she had such a soft spot for him, but it continued to baffle her why he was the only one who could bring out the child in her. And after a stolen childhood, Hans wanted nothing more than to help relive what should have been for Elsa.

Although she smiled and giggled so carefree, he eventually surrendered to the desire to touch her. To run his hands down her beautiful back and hold her in a way no man would ever do on a dance floor. Especially with a queen. Her nightgown was a sumptuous change from her icy cold dress; so soft and warm that she felt like a little heater against him. Meanwhile, Elsa noticed that one major difference in Hans these days was his build. His broader shoulders were irresistible to Elsa, and she found herself melding into his chest every time she got near him.

Fluid twirls and well-executed footwork graced the silence of the hall. Hans was hands down the best partner she'd ever had and in her wildest dreams. Including any of the dreams she'd ever had of the two of them. Sensual emotion behind their every fervent glide probably accounted for the difference between her dreams and real life. Every time Hans spiraled her out, he'd quickly recapture her and place his hand back on her slender hip. Claiming her in a protective manner that she enjoyed very much.

The dark violet light cast across the room held their secret as Elsa spun on the balls of her feet, as elegant and fragile as a jewelry box ballerina tiptoeing to a wind-up lullaby. Secure in the arms of the man who would always be her first love and her true prince.

Hans kept whispering the sweetest nothings against Elsa's ear. Commenting on what a beautiful dancer she was and how much it thrilled him to see her so happy. And Elsa was certain she'd probably never stop grinning at his flattery.

The only damper to Hans' evening was a comment Elsa made about him being such a great dancer. If only she knew the reason why was because he had been trained as a young boy to become a worthwhile partner for his future wife and queen. So much of his upbringing had been devoted to Elsa. He was dancing with the one he had been destined to be partnered with but not in the way they once had envisioned. Not at their wedding and not at her coronation. The thought of which cut him sharp as a razor.

"I should have danced with you at your coronation," his bleak tone piercing her heart.

"Don't say that," she begged with a frown. "Besides, I wouldn't have been able to dance with you or anyone else that night."

"I'd touched you before then and nothing ever happened." That exchange in the library baffled both of them to this day.

"You were too busy asking to marry my sister anyhow."

"That's regrettably true." A more somber mood flowed between them now, feet slowing as the memories of the coronation came pouring back into their minds. "Elsa, I'm sorry. For everything."

Her lips tightened into a thin line, not yet ready to delve into forgiveness or even begin to merge her feelings of past and present. It was easier to disregard the Hans that had shown up that fateful summer day and focus on the one in front of her.

"We're missing something." Hans broke their hold and took Elsa's hand in both of his own. "Will you?" He asked with excitement dancing in his eyes.

The pale hand began to tremble as Elsa's eyes stretched to their fullest. "Hans, are you asking me to marry you?" Voice shaking with trepidation.

"No! No, no. I'm not allowed to, but that's not what I was asking." If having his title stripped hadn't prevented him from asking for a royal's hand in marriage, Hans would have already been planning that. It was another thing Henrik held over him. The freedom to propose to Elsa. Only royalty could ask for a queen's hand. "Here," he said, turning her hand over and lifting it upwards. "I thought we could use some snow, for atmosphere. Ever since I saw you put on that incredible display for the midsummer ball, I've been fascinated with your powers."

Elsa smiled so broadly that it exposed her gorgeous line of pearly white teeth. "Snow it is," she said and spun her hands around themselves before launching a blue nebula of magic into the air where it burst like a confetti shower of snowflakes; transforming the room into their own personal snow globe.

A few flakes fell onto the tip of Hans' nose, and he laughed like a child on the first day of winter.

"You want to see something I've been working on?" Elsa asked and repeated her hand motions.

"Absolutely."

Hans took a few steps back, not knowing what to expect, but his eyes were drawn to the swirling ball of snow just in front of Elsa, commanded by every move of her glowing blue hands.

"Everyone loves what I can do with ice. I mean, I enjoy that the most. But I've been trying to do more with snow because it's more challenging. Controlling that many particles isn't as easy, but this is what I came up with recently."

The small cyclone of snow began to disperse with various wind patterns whipping the tiny blizzard into the shape of a ship charging through the water. Except it was animated. Crashing waves splashed against the ship's hull as it bobbed in the thrashing sea of snow. She'd created an entire scene simply with snowflakes.

"That is unbelievable. It looks so real," Hans gasped with amazement as he watched Elsa shift the direction of her hands and transformed the scene into two people dancing. On closer inspection, Hans could tell it was them. A scene from the dancing that happened just minutes ago.

"I can make anything my mind can imagine."

Elsa conjured scene after scene as Hans looked on with fascination. The same old pangs of his father's warnings rang throughout his mind. The army of one was using her powers to make nothing more than pictures come to life. An artistic expression, not an act of oppression. All of the torture and brainwashing done in vain.

With their feet already tired, the two sat on a mound of snow like two turtledoves affectionately cuddling for more than just warmth. Elsa rested her head against Hans' shoulder with his hand tucked comfortably around her waist as a misty haze provided a never-ending sprinkling of falling snow. A serene and rather romantic show put on by Elsa herself.

"Hans?" Elsa said softly, running her fingers along the buttons of his shirt.

"Hmm?"

"What's my favorite flower?" It only took him a moment before he remembered and sighed happily into the silken hair atop her head.

"Reinroses," he replied and brought an immediate smile to her lips. Hans could recall the exact letter where Elsa had mentioned it. "You like them because they're a beautiful white and because they have eight petals. Rare for a flower, but like I said, you like numbers. And you're a beautiful rarity yourself."

Elsa nuzzled her head closer into Hans' shoulder, thoroughly pleased with his answer.

He figured it was a simple question regarding trivia about each other, and so he carried on, not knowing Elsa's quarry had a much deeper meaning behind it.

"What's my middle name?" Hans asked with mischievous eyes.

Elsa blurted out a laugh, but it was girlish and dainty, music to his ears. "Which one? You have about five last time I counted," she jested and adjusted herself to meet his gaze.

"Whichever is your favorite."

Sapphire eyes shifted to the side as Elsa ran each of the names through her head. Her tongue raced over her lips as she sank deeper in thought, mentally sampling each name until she settled on the one that tickled her fancy.

"Andreas," drawling it so slow and honeyed that Hans found himself aroused by his own middle name.

"Why's that?"

"I like the way it sounds."

The quiet atmosphere was surprisingly comfortable, the timeless twinge of familiarity cultivating a sense of security they could both feel deep in their bones. A place of belonging and contentedness. _Home._

With his arms wrapped firmly around Elsa, Hans inhaled deeply, happily, as they sat and watched the snow flurries materialize and aimlessly trickle down to find their way to the floor; hypnotic and altogether entrancing in their wintry beauty. Just like his queen.

"Snow is always beautiful, but why is yours so much better than nature's?" Hans sighed and tilted his head to rest atop Elsa's pillow of blonde hair.

"Because it's magical," smiling with pride as she held his hand a little tighter and admired the fit.

The scene was perfect, sparkling snow falling around them in the privacy of their winter oasis. In a room that had brought so much joy and tragedy for Elsa, she experienced a moment of pure elation as they quietly kissed. Kisses that led to nothing more because Hans didn't want to push, and Elsa knew that the temptation to go further would have been dangerous for her as well. But the passion and fire would always be there.

Hans let his lips meet Elsa's at a tepid pace at first, immersing himself in the delicate pull of her mouth against his as she fought back a smile. Tongues touched and playfully explored, Elsa proving herself to be quite brave with her flirtation and skill. A dignified royal she was, but a fiery lover lurked under that modest nightgown.

The closer they became, the harder it was for Hans to hold back the avalanche of thoughts and questions that continued to plague him ever since he first saw Elsa with Henrik that one morning. But he stoically bit them back for as long as he could until Elsa was suddenly sitting in his lap, with his arms crisscrossed around her back as she fed from his lips.

"I would be so good to you," he whispered longingly, holding her face between his hands as he lovingly stroked her cheeks with his thumbs.

Something so sweet should have made her feel overwhelmingly happy, but her joy was laced with sadness. Unable to bring herself to say anything, Elsa hugged Hans as hard as she could and nodded. It was clear that the time had come to talk to the one person who could help her with her dilemma. She owed herself an honest talk with Anna, and even more, and honest talk with Hans.

* * *

 _Next update will be really soon, and the one after that will be as well. Trying to post as many as I can before baby comes. BUT they will only be on AO3. There's also some personal edits and pics to go with most chapters over there as well (a small bonus)._


	13. Changing Tides

"You can't decide, can you?" Anna said and desperately tried to hide her 'I told you so' face as she changed a squirming Kristian into some fresh clothes for the day.

It had taken Elsa a good week of stewing in her own turmoil before she finally went to talk to Anna. During which she and Hans had snuck away at least a handful of times for a few brief but very intimate moments. Being with Henrik was great, but it lacked the passion that Elsa and Hans had, finding herself nearly pouncing him for the sweet serenity of his lips every time they got the chance.

By the end of the week, guilt had started to abrade whatever happiness Elsa had with both men, and like a puppy with its tail tucked between its legs, Elsa made her way to the nursery to have that all-important talk she could no longer avoid.

"It's written all over my face, isn't it?" Elsa sulked and helped the baby stuff his chubby little arm into his sleeve as he giggled up at his auntie.

"Actually, it's not. I just sense it." Elsa furrowed her brows at Anna in disbelief. "I've seen you leering at both of them several times this week. I know what that look on your face means." They took turns buttoning up the front of Kristian's outfit as Anna used the moment to gather her courage to have the in-depth heart-to-heart they both needed.

Fully dressed, Anna sat Kristian back in his crib with some toys so that they could talk.

"Is it me that's holding you back?" Anna asked guiltily, turning back around from the crib and nervously playing with her fingers as she peered up at her older sister.

" _You_? Why would _you_ be holding me back?" A meager attempt to skirt around the truth.

"Because you know how I feel about Hans, and I'm not totally sold on Henrik either," crossing her arms over herself. And here Elsa had thought that _she_ was the difficult sister to please.

"Remember when you asked me to bless your marriage, and I said no? Well, now know how good it would have felt to have had sisterly support. Though I was completely right in that situation," pointing an assertive finger in the redhead's direction.

"You were-" Anna admitted, "-and I will support whatever decision you make. As long as whichever one you choose makes you happy."

A nice but completely canned answer if Elsa had ever heard one. She remembered how angry Anna had been with her when she had caught her and Hans kissing in the garden and refused to believe that her sister would be fine with whoever made her _happy_.

"Anna, tell me the truth," Elsa pleaded, cutting to the crux of the issue quicker than a hot blade. "Would you ever be able to move past what happened? Not forget or even forgive, if you don't want to, but to reach a place of tolerance?" Her befuddled blue eyes studied her wringing hands before lifting them up to Anna. "I struggle with the same thing, so don't feel like you're alone in your feelings."

A moment passed, long and weighty as Anna contemplated her answer. "I don't trust him," she said bluntly, a pinprick of sorrow and understanding lancing Elsa's heart. "I know that his father tortured him into doing some of the things he did." Anna wavered for a second. " _And_ there were actions he did on his own. Just the audacity to ask you to bless our marriage, knowing that I didn't have a clue about your past, had to have hurt you very badly. And you'll never know the person I saw when he left me in the library. The coldness." Her chin began to quiver as her mind traveled back to those dark events three years ago. "The look in his eyes when he held that sword above you. How do I forget that, Elsa? A part of me wants to move on and wants to forgive because I see the way you are with each other. He loves you, I can tell. You love him in a way that you'll never love Henrik. But Henrik will treat you well. He's a perfect right-hand man to lead by your side."

"I'm only more confused," Elsa heaved with a heavy breath and pressed the pads of her fingers to her temples.

With Kristian babbling in the background, Anna rested a comforting hand on her sister's shoulder. "Extraordinary problems don't have simple solutions. I only wanted you to know how I really feel. I can't make a decision for you."

The warmth of Anna's hand was enough to pull at Elsa's heartstrings, and a single tear escaped down her pale cheek.

"When did I become someone who carried on with two men at the same time?" Becoming more teary-eyed as she looked back on her unorthodox behavior. "Even if I chose Hans, some people will know that I'm choosing to be with a man who tried to kill me and take over my kingdom."

"That's not the Hans _you_ know," Anna interjected. "It's not the one you're in love with either. I can't begin to understand how all of that must feel."

"But you favor Henrik?"

"Well, he hasn't tried to kill you," laughing uncomfortably before clearing her throat to regroup. "Why do _you_ like him?"

"He's gentle. Kind. Exactly who everyone would want me to marry. And I can't disagree. He's predictable, but I find that calming in a way. Reassuring. I care about him."

Elsa's plight was crystal clear on her pained features, and Anna only had sympathy for her elder sister. Already dealt a hand that not only included being sovereign to her people and magical powers, but to also be caught between two very different kinds of love.

"Have you talked to Hans?" Anna proceeded gently. "Do they know you're seeing both at the same time?"

Elsa gulped in shame, eyes to downcast to the baby blue rug in the nursery. "Hans knows. Henrik doesn't."

"Elsa," Anna's displeased tone provoking Elsa to shake her head at herself, judgment falling with the weight of boulder.

"I haven't talked to Hans. But clearly I need to."

Anna took a seat at a nearby table and pulled Elsa into the chair next to her, hand rubbing sweeping circles of comfort over Elsa's slender back. "I love you and wish I could tell you what to do. This is something you have to do on your own."

"I know," Elsa muttered, whispering down to her lap with her head hung low. "I know."

* * *

Only a few hours into an already grueling day and Elsa was ready for it to be over. Or for lunch at least. Something to break up the monotony of meetings, budget reviews, and legislature.

A queen's duties were hard enough without personal strife ailing her productivity, and Elsa was beginning to feel weaker from the emotional toll it was taking on her.

The talk with Anna had only further complicated things, especially since she echoed some of Elsa's own concerns. Placing Anna and Hans on a scale of priority wasn't an option. Anna would always capture Elsa's fierce loyalty first; there was no question about that.

Anna's words had managed wrap themselves like ivy around Elsa's thoughts. Rogue tendrils of inexcusable behavior towards the one person she swore to protect. And for Elsa, it wasn't the blade over her head that reigned in her trust. It was little things that Hans had done that now plagued her with hesitation. Some things were never forgivable, but were they worth losing him forever?

A small gathering of Elsa's personal advisors and emissaries was next on schedule. Worn ragged, bleary-eyed from a terrible night's sleep, and with an abysmal appetite, Elsa inhaled a deep and rejuvenating breath as she laid her hand on the beautifully crafted door handle and gave herself a few last words of encouragement to help her get through till lunch.

"Gentlemen," she greeted the small table of men in a voice that managed to hide her inner woes.

"Your Majesty. Shall we begin?"

"Please."

The meeting started with updates from different representatives from Arendelle who had been out on economic and trade missions in various kingdoms. Elsa couldn't be everywhere at once and relied on a chosen few to travel on her behalf.

One by one, they informed her of the news from neighboring kingdoms and noteworthy events. Nothing exciting, but Elsa paid close attention to every word they spoke. All sounded great until they came to Aldrige, one of her younger, smarter diplomats.

"Your Majesty, the advisors and I have been talking about the industrial upgrades that other kingdoms and regions have been making at a rapid pace. Arendelle is severely behind the times," he warned as Elsa removed her hand from under her chin and leaned in closer, eyes curiously fixed on the man.

"Behind how? We're expanding at a rate we can't keep up with," the Queen declared with a tilt of her head.

"That's precisely the problem. We don't have the ingenuity in place to meet demand. In the south, machines have taken the place of workers and outdated equipment. Everything is shifting to assembly production."

"And what is it you're proposing?" Sounding intrigued.

Aldrige's eyes widened as he saw his fantastic vision before him. "A revolution in Arendelle's production and manufacturing. We need machinery and tools. We need iron."

Elsa hadn't been out of her own kingdom in quite some time but was aware of the industrial revolution sweeping the western world.

"So we'll do what we need in order to progress."

"Your Grace, we know your private life is usually not a matter of discussion-" the man paused and saw Elsa's brow rise, urging him to continue with caution. "-but it is most beneficial that the large amount of iron we need will be primarily supplied through negotiations with Nørdmore. It's perfect timing that Prince Henrik is so close with Arendelle in our time of need. And as the price of iron is about to soar beyond belief."

In a moment where Elsa should have been jumping for joy that she was courting the man whose very kingdom provided the world's most sought-after ore, she was instead crushed by the weight of a decision made for her by fate. Once caught between love of the heart and love of the mind, Elsa was now obligated by royal duty to see things through with Henrik. How could she not? Besides being very fond of him, and them being a fair match- royally anyhow- her people's prosperity and future depended on her relationship with Henrik and ultimately Nørdmore.

All she could think of was Hans. How, in a split second, the industrial revolution had severed any hope of a future with her admiral. A guillotine to the heart as she silently grieved on the inside in front of half a dozen men who had no idea what had just happened.

With a hard swallow, Elsa was able to push through, the strange sensation of heat crawling up her skin and under the gossamer mantle of her dress. Because ultimately, she was queen first. Above anything else. A revolution was needed, and Elsa would make the personal sacrifice to propel her kingdom into the 19th century.

"It is most fortunate. Arendelle will prosper, and the people deserve it for all of their hard work." And for putting up with a queen who processed magical powers and froze their kingdom, on accident, on one occasion.

A table full of smiles looked back at the queen. They were jubilant to begin paving the road that would secure Arendelle amongst the most well off kingdoms. Right alongside Nørdmore.

"You have no idea the changes that will come, Your Majesty. We're one of the more fortunate kingdoms that will rise with the changing tide instead of drown in it. Especially since timber has been one of our main exports and that's expected to taper of severely. We have the chance to boost our other goods by changing over to a more industrialized economy at a much cheaper rate than other kingdoms. Unlike the Southern Isles who will be left with nothing but dry docks," Aldrige informed with regret.

"Why is that?" Elsa queried.

"Their ships are all made of wood. _Iron_ ships are the way of the future. In time, we'll have to replace our own fleet."

Elsa nodded and buried her emotions until she was almost numb. "And so we shall."

As the advisors celebrated, Elsa remained motionless in her chair and thought of how she was going to break the news to Hans. Destiny had shown Elsa her true path, and she wasn't about to question it, for the sake of her kingdom.

* * *

Elsa put off any major discussions until after Kristian's christening. After five months, it was clear the baby was healthy and thriving, and it was time to celebrate the time-honored tradition.

Later that morning, Elsa had made her way up the winding staircase and happened to pass by Hans who'd been looking for her.

A smile streaked across his overjoyed face but turned dark when he glanced down at her outfit.

"W-what are you wearing?" He managed to ask, gleefully dumbfounded by the exact dress Elsa had worn for her coronation, sans cloak.

"Oh. My nephew's baptism was this morning. It was a church ceremony and called for something more traditional. I wore it for Anna's wedding, so I still get some use out of it." He was suddenly so close to her that she could feel the heat radiating off of him. Practically reaching out and grabbing her with its intensity.

"Are you wearing a crown?" It was like an entirely new Elsa. Well, a blast from the past at least. Nothing new, but her ensemble felt altogether novel after months of the ice dress.

"I am. I'm a queen now. Haven't you heard?" She teased, nudging his arm with her elbow and a delightful giggle. Completely lost in his flirtation and forgetting about the world that awaited her.

"Can I talk to you? Privately?" Hans asked as his mischievous eyes scanned the hallway for any sign of Henrik. "I mean would that be all right?"

"Yeah. Let me um..." Elsa's eyes made the same sweep up and down the hall, looking for Henrik but also trying to decide which room to dash into. "Come with me," motioning for Hans to follow her into a vacant guest room.

Hans' grin grew wicked as soon as he shut the door behind him, discovering just how infatuated he was with Elsa in her more royal attire and coiled back chignon.

His hands flew to her tiny waist, roaming over the sumptuous teal and inky black that covered her gorgeously trim torso and luscious breasts, bound so tightly in a genuine corset.

"The last time I saw you in this dress, I didn't allow myself to admire how beautiful you look in it." Elsa didn't try to stop him and felt herself drift away with the pulsating kisses that Hans was laying along her jaw.

"Please don't remind me of that night," she sighed but let him continue to touch her any way he pleased.

"Sorry. I love the ice dresses, and I know they're a celebration of your powers. Because you had to hide them for so long. But this is just... _lovely._ "

"Really?"

"You forget, I fell in love with you back when you wore clothing like this all the time. Heavy blue dresses. Tailored jackets. You're not just the Snow Queen in a exquisite dress, with your winter white skin and long blonde hair. You're also that bashful young woman still growing into her body. Tightly braided hair and prominent freckles that have faded with time." His thumbs swept over the remaining traces of translucent freckles which he spoke of, loving touches followed by heartfelt kisses along the apple of her cheek. "I've know you your whole life, and I have loved every part of you that I've been privileged to know." His lips were so achingly close to hers that they brushed against them as he spoke, feeling the warm rush of her shuddering breath. "Is this velvet?"

"I believe so," eyes growing heavy with each smoldering kiss he placed upon her pristine skin.

"It's heavenly." His deep voice vibrated through her like a plucked string, making her weak. Hans sat her on the edge of the bed and slithered his hands down her body to admire the black leather flats on her feet.

He kissed her ankle, holding it amorously against his cheek. "Again, I love the ice heels. But these are adorable and still very sexy. And stockings-" roving his hands up and along her slender inner thighs, rucking her dress up to her hips in the process, "-drive me crazy. The dark green is so refreshing on you."

Elsa's lashes fluttered and closed, her heart pumping with fury as his hand found the creamy bare skin at the top of the stocking.

She was supposed to be talking to him about her decision, but she was back to old ways once Hans flashed her that irresistible smirk and whisked her away.

"Hans, stop." She breathed helplessly, not really doing much to enforce her command. "We can't keep doing this. I can't keep doing this. I'm with... I'm with..."

"With Henrik?" Hans said flatly, and it was like a hammer had been dropped because neither one had ever mentioned his name in front of the other.

"Yes."

"Then why are you here with me?" His lips were back to that short distance from hers, flushed and looking so achingly soft that Elsa whimpered and let him kiss her ever so gently until she was back in that fog of desire and bliss. "If you want me stop, I will." The hand teasing the lip of her emerald green stocking began to retreat down her thigh as Hans pulled away, only to be stopped by Elsa. She placed her hand over his, sky blue eyes loyally locked onto vibrant green, and raised it back under her skirt. Her exhale shook as she breathed and led his hand further than even Hans had dared to venture. Their breath accelerated in unison with such urgency as Hans leaned in and followed Elsa's body, carefully laying her back on the bed.

His mouth covered hers, and she opened it wide, tongues searching and crashing as Hans inhaled sharply through his nose. The width of his body spread over her tiny frame, nimble fingers still caressing the soft cotton stretched over her outer thigh.

They got carried away in a hurry, never breaking for air, and started to roll their bodies into each other. In their daily life, they each spent so much time suppressing their lifelong desire and love for one another that it all came spilling out the moment they got some time alone. They seized moments like this for all the times they never got to be together in the past. To make up for what could only be expressed in letters and rarely in person. To recapture the lost time Hans' father had stolen from them. To let their souls be one in perfect harmony without the harshness of reality crashing down on them.

These times with Elsa, pressed against her in bliss, reminded Hans of being on one of his ships and catching a good wind. If it was strong enough, he'd sail as far as it would carry him, never worrying about time or obligations. She was his wind, and he'd follow her anywhere, forever.

However Elsa's tendency to lose herself to temptation was more of a spontaneous combustion. She never knew when it would happen, usually spur-of-the-moment, and it would last for a powerful and brilliant burst, only to fade as she returned to her good senses. Especially on this day.

"I can't. I can't."

Elsa pushed Hans off of her with whatever strength she had and pressed a hand against her mouth as she fled to a corner of the room.

"Twenty-four years. We're just going to throw it all away?" Trying to hide his anger, but he'd had enough. "Tell me you love him more than me. Make me _believe_ it, and I'll never take things beyond our professional relationship ever again."

"You can't keep such a promise." Not knowing if she could even do the same herself.

"Do you love him?"

"He's good to me."

"Do you love him?" Hans asked more urgently. "This isn't about making you choose, it's about me understanding why you don't give me a chance. Why you won't let yourself give in to what you obviously want."

"Because…" Elsa paused, knowing this was all leading to the very conversation she should been having with him in the first place. "I understand that what you did was propelled by your father. That someone had to maliciously hurt you to manipulate you into hurting me. I can excuse a great deal of what happened. But there are things, actions, mistakes that you made on your own that still send a chill up my spine to this day."

"Such as?"

"The way you hurt my sister. You could have saved her, but you took your bitterness out on her instead. She had _nothing_ to do with any of this. She only learned of the betrothal two months ago. And I may be able to forgive you for what you did to me, but my sister..." Throat bobbing with anger and a sudden jerk of sadness. "I'm fiercely protective of her. And you hurt her. I can't ever forget that.

"The way you looked at me when you came to ask me to bless your marriage. To my _sister_ ," eyes opening wider at the absurdity. "Your eyes held such disdain for me. And you enjoyed my misery. _You_ , who I confided in about my pain more than anyone. I never thought you'd do that to me. Such a small thing, but it spoke volumes. Though it's not as bad as the way the light went out in your eyes in that jail cell. You didn't have to kill me. You could have gotten Anna, like I asked, as soon as she came back. She could have helped me. I might have been able to stop the winter then, and we could have even been together after that. You wouldn't have had to go back home if you had told me what happened. Things could have been so different. But you got swept up in the craziness that he infected your mind with. It terrifies me that you could hurt me again. Do I love him? Not the same way that I love you. But with him, I don't have to worry about getting hurt. I don't have to try and juggle decades of emotions when I'm with him.

"And even if I get past the fact that you tried to kill me, I don't think I can ever get over what you did to my sister. She'll never trust you. You made her think you cared for her, and you left her to die."

Black boots clapped against the warm honey wood floor as Hans drew nearer to the crumbling blonde, frost uncontrollably creeping out from under her feet. "Elsa," he started smoothly. "I care about you very much. I _love_ you. So I don't want you to think that what I'm about to say is meant to hurt you. I left Anna to die, it's true. It was cruel and vicious, cold-blooded. Whatever word you want to call it, it's true. But she wouldn't have died from an injury I caused. She would have died from a frozen heart which you caused, on accident."

Her ruby lips tightened into a thin line as the bitter truth of her own actions sat with her for a long a moment of reflection. "But you could have saved her. You knew how and rubbed it in her face."

"I rubbed it in her face, but a kiss wouldn't have saved her anyways. I didn't love her. It wasn't true love, and it had to be a true love's kiss. I had already lost my true love by that point. And what I did to Anna was callous, but she's happily married with a gorgeous baby now. She's better off than any of us. If you should be mad about anything, it should be about what I did to you. The only person I actually tried to murder was you."

"You know what the worst thing is?" Elsa asked, brokenly. "When it comes to myself, I don't know if I'm more damaged over what happened on the ice that day or when you called off the betrothal."

"Elsa, that wasn't my fault."

"I know, but I can't ever forget it."

"Why?"

"Because it ripped my heart out! All of it." The tears burst out and began to run down Elsa's morose as she poured her heart out to Hans. "I'm broken because of you. I don't know how to love. I love my sister and my nephew. That's easy. I never have to think about how easy it is to love them. Even my parents. Although it was complicated, I loved them very much. But romantic love? I don't know how to love anyone like that. Not anymore."

"Anymore?" Frustration and confusion laced his tone, but Hans stilled once Elsa looked up at him through her fanning lashes. Watery blue eyes with that old familiar pain glinting behind them once more.

"From the time I took my first breath, I was told that we would be together. That you would be mine, and I would be yours. It was just an obligation, but I fell in love with you. I've never loved anyone else the way I loved you. And when we kissed that last time, in the library, I could control my powers. I thought that meant something. I thought we were... that we..."

"-were meant to be?" Hans finished. "I did too." His hand gently cupped her cheek and tried to wipe away a tear, but Elsa turned away, the corners of her mouth pressing into a deeper frown.

"I can't go back in time with you, and I don't think I can go forward either. So much has happened."

"You can love again, Elsa," Hans pleaded despite the shaking of her head. "You don't let your past determine who you are now. Not as a woman and not as a queen. Don't let it hold you back from the love you know you deserve."

Something pulled within Elsa in that moment. A steel settling into her bones that allowed her to quiet herself into a statuesque resilience. She flicked away any remaining tears, and Hans could feel her body stiffen as she slipped out from his hold.

"I'm not," she asserted more steadily, spine straightening with the air of a queen. "It may not be perfect. I may be broken, but Henrik is good to me. He's good to my people. And only good can come from it."

"That's what you want?!" Hans scoffed with a brashness he'd never shown before. Because this time, he could feel the reality of losing Elsa creeping up on him faster than he could stop it. That he'd lost.

"I want to be happy. I want love. I want to be a mother. I want a happy ending, too. Does anyone think I deserve that?"

A cry caught in her throat. Because for all of the happiness that had taken place over the past three years, Elsa had only been a witness to most of it. Young love, a big white wedding, and a gorgeous baby had all been Anna's. And although Elsa wasn't the jealous type, it pained her that all of her people thought of Anna as the only sister who would lead such a life. Leaving Elsa to rule as a lone spinster because of her reclusive past and inability to make herself a priority. She did want it all, and she wanted her kingdom's support in the process.

"You do," Hans murmured quietly. "I just think you're looking for it in the wrong place."

As curt as Elsa was trying to be in an attempt to save herself from delving too emotionally deep, she knew she was hurting Hans. Probably as badly as this whole thing was tearing her up. Compassion, not bitterness, was needed. A moment of sincerity because she owed him that.

"I want nothing more than to have a happy ending with you. It would be poetic justice. But I can't see how. Especially when I have an opportunity to spend the rest of my life in a safe haven with someone I at least care for. You're a good man, and I want happiness for you. But I'm not it. I can't be."

It was the finale neither of them expected but that Elsa wouldn't abandon, sticking to her guns and moving forward, no matter how badly it gutted them both.

Hans' chin quivered, and he tried his best to hide it. He had to let her go; there was no choice. Even if he could barely breathe, he had to respect her wishes.

"Admiral and queen then?"

"It's what's best," Elsa whispered, wiping away another tear. "I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry, too." His heart was breaking, shattering into a million pieces all over again, but Hans held it all together behind his stoic veneer, simply raising Elsa's hand to place one last kiss on it before he left the room, and they left everything in the past.

The door clicked behind the admiral, the fading sound of his footsteps growing more distant as Elsa slumped, defeated, against the wall with a thud. Her body felt like it would give out on her, clutching her chest and the place where it burned and ached like a wild inferno. Her breath came is silent gasps, sharp and broken as she bared the crushing blow of her own decision.

* * *

The King of Nørdmore sailed into the kingdom after answering a special request by Henrik to pay his blushing queen a visit. King Roman had never been to Arendelle and what better way to welcome him than with a spectacular dinner party. The perfect distraction for Elsa and an opportunity to show her commitment to Henrik by lavishing his brother with her insurmountable hospitality and charm.

Initially, it felt strange for Elsa to pursue a romantic and an obviously political venture simultaneously. However, it dawned on her that her own father had done that same thing many times, Elsa included, with the betrothal. A queen's heart was a valuable card to lay on the table in a game where everyone was trying to get ahead. Securing allies and assuring wealth was something with which every monarch was tasked.

As Elsa oversaw the preparations, watching servants place sparkling gold-trimmed plates along the length of a massive dinner table, she assured herself that she was making the best choice. The silverware was perfect. The background music provided by a small quartet, sublime. Everything as it should be. Including Elsa and Henrik as they made their appearance arm-in-arm, smiling like the perfect couple right on top of a wedding cake.

After dinner followed some light conversation over drinks in the parlor, melodic hums of violins intertwined with laughter winding through the halls of the castle.

Anna and Kristoff entertained King Roman with stories of their adventures in the mountains and in parenthood. Elsa was proud that she could rely on her sister to be a perfect co-host and conversationalist. It was a little difficult for Elsa to be on her best game when Henrik held her so stiflingly close, his hand on her waist and the tickle of his nose and mustache ghosting against her neck as he snuck little kisses behind her ear and whispered about how lovely she looked. The king caught the exchange a few times, but it only made him beam with pride that his younger brother had finally found someone with whom to settle down with. Elsa was a true prize in anyone's eyes. The freewheeling-bachelor reputation Henrik had procured in his time hadn't sat well with Nørdmore, but word of his more serious courtship with the queen had changed that overnight.

A rousing account of Kristian's first night of teething occupied the king's attention long enough for Henrik to steal Elsa away to the balcony unnoticed.

A crystalline blanket of stars filled the night sky, illuminating the wisteria draped over the side of the castle.

Henrik was positively giddy as he let his eyes sweep over Elsa. She'd created a dress especially for the evening. A variation on her normal green summer dress but with a few more embellishments. Her hair was down and pulled back by two small braids on the sides. An icy star still positioned nicely on her right side. She was _gorgeous_. So much so that it made Henrik stutter.

"Elsa, I-I know I said that I needed time, but with our families both here and you looking so beautiful, I don't want to wait any longer."

A thundering stallion had to be lodged inside Elsa's chest because her heart was racing out of control as Henrik knelt down on one knee and took her shaking hand.

"I love you more than anything. You've shown me what life can offer, and I want it all with you. Will you marry me?"

The gleam in his eye was breathtaking. She believed what he said with all of her being and if this was her fairytale moment, Elsa was going to enjoy it.

"Yes."

Henrik leapt off his knee and kissed Elsa before hugging her harder than he ever had before.

"Would it be alright if I shared the news with everyone tonight?" He asked excitedly, already making his way to the door.

"Of course. It seems only fitting since your brother leaves tomorrow. But let's just keep it between family for now. I want to wait until we negotiate everything to make a formal announcement. And a date would be nice so that the people have something to look forward to over the winter."

"Whatever pleases you, my love."

The roar of laughter was interrupted as Henrik led Elsa back into the room on his arm.

"I couldn't think of a better evening to share this great news with everyone. With my older brother here and Anna. It's a shame Kristian is sleeping." The room murmured with chuckles. "I've asked Elsa to marry me, and she's accepted."

A gasp tore throughout the room as Henrik's older brother boomed with excitement and congratulatory cheers. Elsa's eyes, of course, immediately went to Anna who was jaw-dropped with disbelief, champagne glass dangling dangerously in her limp grip.

Elsa had waited her entire life for happiness, and when Anna looked at her beloved sister, she knew this wasn't it. The smiling blonde was putting on a show for all those who didn't know her well enough to see that she was breaking on the inside. Tears of sorrow that escaped down her alabaster cheeks were easy to play off as tears of joy, and Anna immediately berated herself for what she'd said about Hans. Whether it had been said in truth or not, Anna blamed herself for this moment. For not encouraging her sister to follow her heart, even if it was the rockier road of the two.

Roman wrapped his arm around a thunderstruck Anna, unable to contain his excitement. "Anna? What do you think? I gather Kristian will have a playmate in no time. You must be thrilled!"

"Thrilled, yeah..."

Henrik pulled Elsa even closer and kissed her for all the room to see. He was in love, obviously. But Anna was drowning in a vortex of fear over what her sister had just thrown down for herself. It was like Elsa was racing down a river towards a waterfall and had wholeheartedly accepted her fate. All Anna could do was play witness to a travesty disguised as a blessing to their kingdom.

* * *

 _Fair warning that the next chapter is a difficult one, but I promise it will be soooooo worth it. I'm really hoping to get the next two chapters out soon so that I don't have to leave it on a cliffhanger. TGIF and have an excellent weekend!_

 _PS- There is an edit (fanart) for this chapter over on AO3. Feel free to repost any of my edits as long as you leave the watermark._


	14. Paint it Black

_A huge thank you to my beta Let-it-geaux for helping me churn these chapters out on time. If you make it past this one, you shall be greatly rewarded. Seriously, I made sure not to post this chapter until the next one was done just in case I went into labor. Enjoy!_

* * *

Hans stared aimlessly at the wooden beams above his head. Mind-boggling rows of dark stained pine that blurred in and out of focus as the vodka he'd been sipping on began to swath his body with a somnolent warmth.

The same day that he and Elsa had broken off their relationship, Hans moved out of the castle and into the captain's quarters of Arendelle's newest ship. The one he'd watched over during its entire construction in the dry docks of the Southern Isles. He knew that the ship would be for Elsa and loved it even more when he learned that it would be the ship that carried him back to her. In a way, it was _their_ ship to him, the only way he could be with her in these days of solitude and dwindling happiness. When the summer ended, he'd leave it behind, along with any hopes or dreams he still had of the two of them.

After one shot of vodka, Hans could only hear the distant rattling of her name repeating in his head like a broken melody, the image of her fading once the alcohol hit his bloodstream. After the third, he could still feel the tightness in his chest when he thought about her, but it stopped the merry-go-round of memories and joyous laughter haunting and torturing him as they flashed across his mind. Four did the trick, and now Hans was only aware of his breathing. Painstakingly slow breaths that made him wonder if he was even alive at all as he watched the dancing flicker of the candle's reflection on the polished wood above.

It wasn't just losing Elsa that was draining the life from him. It was the ugly feeling that his father could still hurt him from beyond the grave. Because of what he'd done to Hans, how he'd warped Hans into a monster, Hans had lost his one and only love, again. Psychological strain, survival instinct, and a bitter scornfulness had lead Hans to make mistake after mistake over the course of the coronation and the days following. And he'd pay for it forever as Elsa lived out her days with Henrik.

* * *

"My love, have you thought of a date?" Henrik cooed into Elsa's ear as she helped straighten his cravat in the light of a westward window. Sun dripped over every inch of her fair skin, and Henrik admired the way it brightened her long locks and infectious smile.

"I was thinking June. Waterways are open then, and it's a good distance away from Anna and Kristoff's anniversary," Elsa suggested matter-of-factly and gave the cravat a good tug to get it to lay properly over Henrik's dress shirt, ignoring the string of memories such an action provoked. Up until she had refused to touch anyone, Elsa had always helped her father straighten his attire as he prepped her with tidbits of information that she carried with her to this day.

"June is so far away," he groaned like a stubborn child. "What about _this_ summer?"

" _This_ summer?" Elsa snapped, not meaning to and quickly smiled to smooth over the tenseness mounting in Henrik's brows. "It's nearly over."

"You're going to make me wait until June for you, huh?" Playful tone accompanying the wandering hand wrapping around Elsa's waist as a wry smile played across Henrik's lips.

" _Wait_ for me?" As if she wasn't exactly sure what he was referring to. She'd already promised to marry him.

"Elsa," lowering her hands away from their work at the cravat and placing them on either side of his shoulders before promptly returning his own to her waist. "I'm 34-years-old. It's obvious I haven't been saving myself for marriage. And I know by reputation, neither have you. We don't have to wait."

Now she was even more confused and angered that he'd affronted her with accusations that she even had a reputation.

"Wait, my reputation?" Shaking her head in confusion. "What do you mean?" Last time Elsa checked, she was known for being a queen, with powers, and the rest of her life was private with the exception of her close bond with her sister.

"Well people in town do talk, but I can just tell." His hands followed the contour of her hips as he went on, eyes growing dark as he did so. "You exude a sexuality that can only come from _knowing_ another person. Your dress, the way you walk, the way you look at me sometimes like you know exactly what it is you want. It doesn't bother me that I won't be your first. You'll be mine forever more."

"I want to wait," Elsa cut short and quick. And it was a command, not a request. "If I'll be yours forever, as you say, then waiting a matter of months shouldn't be too difficult." After all, she'd done a fair amount of waiting for him to mature enough to even get to this point.

Henrik chuckled lightly, thumbing the edge of her bodice at the small of her back. "You don't make it easy for me. May, and I'll wait," negotiating with her like her body was something to even consider bargaining over.

Elsa nodded her head in agreement. It was a long enough time to ask someone to wait. "May it is." And that was that. Or so she thought.

Henrik's hands left her hips and combed through the platinum mane cascading down Elsa's back, grinning furiously as her eyes resisted closing.

"Your hair is so beautiful like this. I love the braid. I'm a sucker for tradition, but this is majestic. You are Freya herself, sensual goodness meant to drive men crazy." His hand stroked the back of her hair, capturing two long strands on each side as he slid his fingers to the tips and released them, salivating over its length and celestial color.

"Thank you," she gulped timidly and felt a flush uncontrollably creep up her neck. He was coming on stronger than usual, and Elsa mysteriously found herself shrinking at the outpouring of attention.

"We've been courting for months. And we're engaged. Don't you yearn for me the way I yearn for you? I want to touch you. More than just kiss you," pulling back to see trepidation swirling in her cerulean orbs. "Or have I made a mistake?"

"No. No mistake," she reassured. "I said yes, and you're right. I shouldn't hold back like I have been. If you want to touch, please do."

Henrik smiled giddily and tilted his head down to kiss her, more rough than normal, causing Elsa to suppress a yelp that wanted to escape from the coarseness of his mustache. She felt his hand on her waist again as it began to slide up the scales of ice on her bodice, grabbing one of her breasts without much warning. He squeezed excitedly and moaned into her mouth, relishing the feeling of the pert, youthful mound that he was kneading.

Elsa's heart thundered, but not in the enjoyable way. It was like she was panicking, wondering how far he'd go and why she wasn't enjoying his advances one bit. When he touched her, he did so with authority, like he was claiming her. He was so tall and large that she suddenly felt so very small and... _young_. The age difference had never really bothered her before and neither had Henrik's older features, but it was coming to light at the worst time, as he grew more needy with his ministrations.

He broke from her lips and mouthed at her neck, daring to leave a mark that all would see but remarkably restraining himself. Her name resonated in hot breaths against her skin, and her jaw clamped tighter than her eyes.

"Elsa!" Anna yelled hysterically through the door. "I need help with Kristian!"

Oh, how Elsa had never loved her sister more than she did in that moment, providing the perfect disruption for her to jump out of Henrik's captive hold.

"I'm coming!" Prying herself away as she apologized to Henrik and slipped out the door.

Relieved to be back in the hallway with some personal space, Elsa listened as Anna began to explain how Kristian had a fever, and she needed her to cool him down. A lucky child indeed to have an aunt that could hold him _and_ lower his fever at the same time.

Elsa carefully took the crying baby from Anna's arms, and they rushed back to the nursery so that she could rock him in the rocking chair.

Anna watched frantically as Elsa calmly rocked back and forth in the chair, shushing and cooing to her sweet nephew while she laid a gelid hand on his forehead and raspberry-flushed cheeks. His cries calmed after a few minutes, as did Anna's nerves, and Elsa began to sing sweetly to the little prince. Her voice was like a warm blanket, swaddling its tiny listener in love and comfort. Kristian didn't even make it to the end of the song, one their mother had sung to them as children, and, before long, his tiny eyes lidded shut for some recovery sleep.

"There," Elsa whispered and gave the baby a kiss on the forehead. "All better."

With Kristian off to dreamland, Elsa gently placed him back into Anna's arms. The redhead stared at her sister in wild amazement, eyes wide and mouth agape.

"You really are magical. And I don't mean the ice. You got him to stop crying."

"I just did what I thought he would like. And I'm pretty sure the cold helped his fever. Can't have him swinging from clock towers and blowing bugle horns out in the courtyard now, can we?" Elsa chuckled at her own mockery, but Anna was still lost in the sentiment of the sweetness she just bestowed upon her baby.

"You're going to be such a great mother some day. They will be very lucky children."

"It's because I have such a great example in you. Go put him down and get some rest. Kristoff should be back soon. Then he can take over."

Elsa was beaming as she shut Anna's door and headed down the hallway, thinking about what Anna had said about her being a good mother. Then it occurred to her with whom she would be having children. She and Henrik were going to be married. Which meant he was going to be the father of her children. And they were going to have to sleep together, probably dozens of times even, to create those children. If a rough kiss and a grope bothered Elsa that much, she cringed at the thought of him bedding her. The more she thought about it, the more she started to worry about it hurting or him wanting more than what she was ready to give to him. He would respect her wishes, of course, but what kind of a wife wouldn't want to please her husband? And she liked him. Why couldn't her body and mind just agree?!

She ran to the library and slammed the door behind her. It wasn't just the place where she and Hans had their earliest encounter, but it was also a place she could be with her father. His portrait at least. Elsa didn't bother grabbing a chair and lifted herself onto the console table to be as close to him as she could. Tears quietly escaped as Elsa pressed a hand to the image of the stoic King in all his regalia, pained that she couldn't touch him past the age of ten and that she couldn't do so now.

 _One day._

She always reminded herself that they would be reunited again. That he would embrace her and hold her strongly like only a father could.

"Papa," she whispered through her tears. She wasn't the only one of his daughters that talked to pictures on the wall. "Do I make you proud?"

As a queen, Elsa knew that her father would approve of her leadership. He would have been even more proud that she had learned to control her powers, which allowed her to be accepted and reunite with her sister. But as a daughter, she feared that she was too vexed to feel like she was the stable one of his two girls. Anna had a husband and a family. Elsa had a martyr complex, intimacy issues. And a befouled sense of love.

"I don't know what to do." She didn't expect an answer, just wanted to get the words out to someone who would listen and comfort her. Even if it was only in spirit.

* * *

As the week went by, Anna noticed small changes in Elsa's behavior. Her charming personality was growing bleaker by the day. She and Henrik were inseparable, yet it didn't seem like Elsa was happy at all.

Then, one afternoon, Anna left her room and saw Elsa swishing by her in gown that made her gasp in fright.

"Whoa, wait, Elsa!" Anna called after her fast-moving sister. "Where are you going?"

"To lunch," glancing over the banister to the same path she usually took to get to the dining room before looking back at Anna.

"What's wrong?" Anna asked frantically as if impending doom were upon them, and, oddly enough, the question made Elsa giggle.

" _Wrong_?" Her laugh settling in her throat. "Other than being hungry, I'm fine."

"Elsa, please don't lie to me," a hint of the once-abandoned sister lurking low in Anna's voice. "Look at your dress." It was midnight blue, glittering in the late morning light in an almost stunning manner. But when paired with the melancholy exuding from Elsa's features, it was terribly tragic.

Steely blue eyes flicked down to the bodice and skirt that more resembled the murky waters of the deepest part of the fjord than the vibrant glacier hue Anna adored.

"I'm fine," Elsa lied with a twist of her lips and brushed the front of her skirt as if that would have some affect on its color. "I'm going to meet my fiancé for lunch. Hope you'll join us." She flashed the redhead a meager smile before turning on her heel and heading for the stairs. The smile was robotic in nature and chilling in its absurdity. And Anna knew then that Elsa had pushed herself too far.

"You were right," Anna blurted urgently to Elsa's back, forcing her to stop where she stood, hand firmly grasping the smooth dark railing like she'd frozen herself to it.

Anna hardly ever admitted she was wrong. She could barely form the word sometimes, even in situations where she knew she was wrong. So the fact that she was yelling it down the length of the hallway caught Elsa's attention, but she didn't turn around.

"You were right about those thirteen years. I never saw things from your perspective or thought about how it affected you because I didn't know what you were really dealing with."

Thin white fingers clamped down on the banister as Elsa's jaw tightened. Remembering that room and the feeling of the thick wooden door against her back. The pain. The misery. The memory of that deep dark place was always at the tips of her fingers. And in an instant, Elsa was back there.

"You stayed away from me to protect me, because you loved me. You sacrificed thirteen years of your life, your childhood, and even Mama and Papa. You didn't get to hug them. And you didn't even get to go to their funeral. I understand why now. I was so busy being angry with you for all those years that I couldn't see past my own experience. You sacrificed thirteen years, for me. Don't sacrifice the rest of your life for Arendelle."

When Elsa turned around, Anna was surprised to see how calm she looked. Not happy at all but strangely composed.

"Anna, I was born first. I don't have the luxury of freedom like you do." Elsa took a step away from the stairs and looked at Anna so seriously that it almost made her flinch. "At the crowning ceremony during the coronation, while you were busy flirting with Hans, there was a choir singing. Do you remember what they sang?"

Knowing that she hadn't been paying enough attention that day to spit out an answer, Anna sheepishly shook her head.

"Worthy queen of greatness, the heart of gold shines. We crown thee with hope, love, and faith. Beautiful, stony land, Arendelle. Follow the queen of light."

Anna could feel the weight of each word as Elsa spoke. Layer upon layer of immeasurable trust and pressure that had been placed on Elsa's narrow shoulders.

"Not just pretty words," Elsa said dourly. "But a promise. A duty. You're a mother; you must understand that kind of responsibility." Anna nodded shyly, though Elsa's responsibility was daunting in an entirely different way. "Sacrifice is part of that duty. Life isn't fair, and it was never promised to be. I'm thankful for what I have. It's more than most." The way Elsa spoke was almost heartbreaking. The life and soul had been sucked out of the woman in a way that terrified Anna. "You always wanted me to read those fairy tales you loved so much. But those are books, Anna. And while some may live lives very similar to the happiness described in those stories, I'll never be one of them. And I'm okay with that."

Anna wanted to run and throw her arms around her sister and break her from her trance, but she was repelled by some emotional force field that Elsa seemed to have surrounded herself with.

"Please don't do this," Anna pleaded with her hands outstretched as if they were a life raft waiting to carry Elsa to safety. "If you're this unhappy now, I can't bare to see you in another year. Or five."

"I've made a decision, and I'm happy with it. I wish you would be too." With that, Elsa turned and lifted her skirt a bit to take the first step down the stairs and into the land of denial.

"I can't walk you down the aisle," Anna mumbled through sudden tears streaking over her freckles. But Elsa heard, and, out of all the things that Anna had said, that one got her to spin around and stride right up to her outspoken sister.

"You what?" Elsa gasped, anger and hurt inflicting a harshness upon her words.

"I can't walk you down the aisle," Anna repeated brokenly. Elsa had walked her down the aisle at her wedding, and Anna couldn't wait to repay the favor someday. But now she just couldn't, knowing that she was leading her sister to a life of misery.

"It's not enough that I won't have my father there to walk me down the aisle and give me away, but now my sister as well?" The very thought was like a sharp dagger in Elsa's back.

"Look at what it's doing to us already. Look at what it's doing to you. I was wrong. Henrik will treat you well, but you know what? It doesn't matter because you don't love him. Love should bring out the best in both of you. Not the worst.

"I'm not as wise as you, Elsa. I don't give the best advice. A grudge isn't worth holding of it robs you of what you want. I can hold onto that resentment towards Hans for what he did forever, or I can find a way to accept that, despite what happened, my sister, who is my hero, my everything, my protector and brilliant, beautiful queen, is in love with him." Tears had turned into sobs as Anna reached for Elsa's hands, and although Elsa was mad, she let her hold them anyway.

"I'm marrying Henrik. If you want to walk me down the aisle, I would love that. And if not, that's your choice." Elsa gave Anna's tiny hands one small squeeze before letting go and rushing down the stairs before she said or did anything she'd truly regret.

With each step she took, she let Anna's words vacate her mind and pushed those boiling feelings down, way down, until she met up with Henrik and obediently looped her arm around his. Her smile hid everything, and her tough-as-nails veneer veiled the truth from the one man who should have been able to see past her facade.

* * *

The date and time to finalize the premarital agreement was set for the end of the week, giving Henrik's lawyers and kingdom officials enough time to pull into port. Being second in line to his own throne added extra legal procedures that had to be hashed out beforehand, even though the king of Nørdmore was young and thriving. It was also tradition for royals to commit to the marriage at such a meeting. Once Elsa and Henrik signed their names to the agreement, there would be no turning back. Not without a difficult and embarrassing dissolution of the premarital agreement.

 _Six o'clock_ , Elsa said as she mentally readied herself to sign that paper and fully commit to Henrik. She chided herself for being so childish with him. She was a woman, albeit younger, but one that should be able to handle what a marriage and a husband required of her. In every other aspect of her life, she was queen, supreme ruler and respected monarch. But in the privacy of the marital bed, she would be his wife.

Despite the unrealistic expectations she'd developed from her experience with Hans, Elsa knew she needed to grow up. She convinced herself that she still had a child's idea of a fairytale romance in her head, and that it would only cost her in the end. She'd loved Hans more than anyone and would never be able to get over him, but Henrik was a better choice. He was royalty, by title and not just blood, and he was a great leader that would see her kingdom prosper into the next century. The strengthened alliance would bring her people even more happiness. She stood to gain nothing from the Southern Isles that she didn't already have. Henrik was handsome and intelligent. And she knew, in time, that she would come to love him as he did her.

Elsa rolled over to her nightstand and extinguished her light. She settled nicely into her covers, pushing her worries aside as she'd already made up her mind. However, that night, as usual, Elsa dreamed of Hans and was pulled back into the world she refused to embrace.

* * *

A letter came for Hans on a rather crisp and chilly morning. He'd been sipping on some black coffee in a room inside the castle reserved for his crew's meals, the only time he set foot in the place anymore except for meetings. It was from his brother, the king. Attacks had been reported in the southern waters, and while Caleb wished to keep Hans in Arendelle as long as possible, he had to call him and the crew home.

Shocked green eyes read and reread the letter at least three times before the news finally sank in, his heart throbbing with sadness each time he did so. The robust taste of rich roasted brew swished around Hans' mouth as he swallowed the last bit in his cup. _Just as well,_ he thought to himself, self-pity accompanying the heat from his coffee as it burned down his throat. There was only so much hope one soul could maintain. To have gone through what Hans had and still have one last brief moment in time with Elsa was more than he could have ever asked for. And sadly, it seemed as though fate had finally caught up with him. As idyllic as a happy ending with Elsa would have been, he now believed, more than ever, that it really wasn't meant to be. Just as she'd said.

With a heavy heart turning colder by the minute, Hans refolded the letter, vigilantly matching up the edges to where the wax seal of the Southern Isles was impressed on the regal page. Hans rose from his seat with a straight face, swallowed his troubles, and called an emergency meeting with his men.

* * *

A storm was seething over the darkened skies of Arendelle. Bands of gold attempting to break through the heavy gray of the oncoming clouds like summer was putting up its last fight against an impending fall. What should have been a glorious sunset was turning into a cyclone of deathly cold wind that heralded the threat of rain. Unusual weather to say the least, but Hans figured it was the perfect backdrop to his reluctant departure from the kingdom.

He'd been dragging his feet about it ever since he'd read the letter. While the rest of the men packed their belongings and loaded them onto the vessel, Hans spent his time stewing in the captain's quarters of Arendelle's ship. Pining over his love lost as a hearty swig of whiskey scorched his throat. A lifetime of memories that would take him the rest of his days to get over.

His captain waited for him at the edge of the docks, brows knitted in concern as he gazed up at the black underline forming in the clouds off in the distance.

"Admiral, we have to leave soon. The storm is rapidly approaching, and we need to get ahead of it. Your brother made it clear that he wants us to return at once," the captain informed with a steady voice.

A spiral of clouds was whirling over the castle, and Hans could no longer ignore the conditions, knowing his captain was right.

"Have my things transferred," Hans ordered over the howling wind as it whipped through his auburn hair. Though he didn't pay any attention. A doleful look appeared on the captain's face as he searched for the reason behind the sorrow in the young admiral's eyes.

"Sir?" Not knowing how else to respond to his woebegone superior but also unable to dismiss the regret that weighed so heavily on Hans' shattered features.

Hans' eyes lifted up to the castle as he let out a heavy sigh, defeat and a palpable sense of lament rumbling through his chest. "I have to say goodbye to her."

"I don't think that's possible. I had asked her staff if she could see us off, but they said she was busy today with an appointment that couldn't be broken. Rumor has it, the marital negotiations are taking place this evening. Makes sense; they always do these things in the secrecy of night."

"Wha- martial negotiations?" Hans spat with surprise as his body stiffened into stone. "They're engaged?"

The captain nodded in reply. "You didn't know? They've been engaged for about a week. Nothing stays private in this kingdom. Surely you had to have heard?"

"No! I didn't know anything, I-" Hans snapped his head back up to the castle and caught the light glowing from a tiny room in the east wing. "Marital negotiations," he panted in a panic. "When? What time?"

"I assume now since she couldn't be here."

Before the man could get out another word, Hans moved passed him and headed directly towards the castle.

"Admiral, I beg you," trying to stop him. "It's beyond your power now, and we _have_ to leave. The storm will surely-"

"I don't care about the storm!" Hans roared over the wind like it was a battle call. "I'm not leaving! I'm not leaving without seeing her." He struggled to break free of the captain's hold until Hans grabbed the man by the collar of his coat, jerking him close. "I'm not leaving until I see her," to which the captain finally stepped aside.

It all made sense now. Her scarce appearances. The mysterious ship that had pulled into the harbor that morning, carrying the representatives from Nørdmore, no doubt. Everything right down to the ominous clouds encircling the castle overhead. Henrik had made his move and staked his claim on Elsa. That broke Hans' heart, but what worried him the most was the storm. The color, the formations. It was eerily familiar, and Hans knew he'd seen something similar that terrible day out on the frozen fjord. Something was wrong, and it sank into Hans' stomach like a seeping vile of acid. This wasn't just about him; this was about _both_ of them.

Rain began to trickle down from the sky, and while that may have not been due to the obvious SOS that Elsa's powers were sending out over the pitch of the castle, he knew he had to stop the meeting from taking place, if he wasn't too late already.

His feet began to move without even thinking, carried by his heart as he leapt up the steps of the harbor and down the streets of town. By the time he passed the outdoor flower shop, he was lighter than air and faster than a bullet as he sprinted to the bridge leading to those open gates. His blood pounded with the fury of a drum, lungs burning with fire from the sudden burst of energy. But it wasn't enough to stop him. Nothing would stop him.

* * *

 _Stay tuned..._

 _(next chapter should be up within the week)._

 _Have a great weekend and enjoy Star Wars if you're heading out to see it like me :)_


	15. Breaking Point

_Ummm...possible M rated events ahead. Possible._

* * *

The sky had broken, and rain began to pour down in unforgiving sheets over the kingdom. All signs of the once-brilliant sun were obscured by the burgeoning clouds slithering in over the castle like a serpent stalking its prey. Hans' boots slapped the wet ground and splashed against his trousers as he ran through the main street of town and over the stony bridge outside the castle gates.

His mind rapidly thought faster than his legs carried him. Thunder crashed and lightning cracked louder than a whip above him as waves began to violently pound against the rocky shoreline. Precious time had run out on Hans, and he raced against the clock. Not only to take one last chance at a dying dream but to also save Elsa from whatever misery she was clearly in.

The cobblestone of the courtyard was slick underneath Hans' feet as he struggled to keep his balance while surging through it like a man gone mad. Thank goodness the doors were still open, a servant just beginning to close them, as Hans breathed a fleeting sigh of relief and bolted up the stairs two at a time.

He knew there was only one room lit up that he'd seen from outside, but he had no clue if that was even where the meeting was taking place or how to get there.

Panic set in as he watched his feet carefully speed-step up the stairs, only to find Anna cross-armed and pacing at the top while she agonizingly chewed on her lip.

Her face said it all. Anguished features devoid of their normal joviality, almost like Elsa was on her deathbed. Teal eyes floated up from their downcast gaze, glimmering slightly with hope at the sight of Hans. Something Anna never thought she'd feel in a hundred years. Even she hadn't been persuasive enough to keep Elsa from proceeding with the premarital agreement. And as much as it rubbed her the wrong way, Hans was her last hope.

"Where is she?!" He shouted breathlessly, chest aching as he sucked in as much air as he could while he waited for her to answer.

Anna uncrossed her arms and pointed down the dimmed hallway. "In the council chambers. Same place you sentenced her to death." She just couldn't help herself but immediately felt guilty when Hans' expression fell into one of deep remorse. Almost like he was on his last leg and she'd been the final blow to crush his spirit.

Time was slipping away, but Hans couldn't move. His feet were nailed to the floor, and he just stared at Anna with regret pooling in his eyes.

"Anna…" He quavered and swallowed another breath, not exactly knowing what to say until he realized there was only one thing he could say. "I'm sorry."

Her lips pressed together, and she felt the tiniest bit better but knew that it wasn't enough to sway her just yet. But it didn't matter. Her pride getting in the way was going to cost them all. "Just go!" Emphatically waving her hand. "Save her from herself before it's too late."

And just like that, Hans took off like a shotgun had been fired, running to Elsa and everything she stood for. Everything he needed and more.

Hans' arms flew out wildly, and he slowed his pace as he approached the doors to the chambers, catching his breath and adjusting his clothing before combing his hands through his damp hair, flicking the remaining droplets of rain from his fingers before he entered.

His breath was still hurried when he opened the door and saw a group of men, including Henrik, shoot their eyes up from the table spangled with paperwork to Hans. Shocked and offended at the absurdity of the sudden intrusion.

The room was terribly dark, candlelight straining to provide enough light to even read by in the gloomy space that seemed to be submerged in secrecy. Hans' eyes frantically skipped about for a moment, ignoring the angered faces staring back and a fuming Henrik boring holes into him from his seat on the left side of the table. Then Hans' eyes settled on the high-backed chair in front of him. He couldn't see a thing of the person who occupied it, but he knew she was there.

It took all his effort to walk the three small steps to the side of the chair, and when he saw her he was speechless.

Elsa's small hands were twisting tightly around each other. Thumbs sweeping furiously over her reddening knuckles, sadly the only sign of color on her entire body with the exception of her perfectly painted lips and usual dark dusting of shadow over her lids.

She blinked a few times and looked up at him through her lashes with the visage of someone about to face the executioner's noose. She was sorely fragile and obviously depressed beyond a shadow of a doubt, but she was beautiful as always. She was drowning in the self-inflicted doom she'd brought upon herself but couldn't abandon her duties, no matter the cost.

"This is a private meeting, if you don't mind!" Boomed one of Nørdmore's lawyers. So loudly that it shook even Henrik, but Hans never took his eyes off his beloved Elsa, sweeping her away from the pressure of the meeting and to a place of clarity with his presence alone.

With just one look, love and compassion ever so abundant on his handsome features, Hans could take her back to the place of safety and strength he'd provided for her from their earliest days as children.

Torn between two parts of herself, Elsa realized that she had faced this battle before and won. She never believed she'd be able to control her powers _and_ be queen. It had been a crippling belief that had held her back in so many ways, but she proved herself wrong in the end. She was a magnificent blend of an enchanting woman with unearthly powers and a regal queen with a heart of gold that her people had never known before. Everything, right down to her dress, originally spun from a traditional garment of royalty, was a testament of her ability to hold on to her true self and fulfill her duties as the reigning monarch.

Her skin prickled as a flurry of ideas began to swirl through Elsa's head. Ways she could make this work. Belief that there was another way. That she could be the queen her kingdom needed her to be without losing herself and the love of her life.

She could already feel the spirit she'd regained after the Great Thaw dissipating with each passing day. And wasn't that what her people loved most about her? Elsa was extraordinarily kind and generous. Wise beyond any of her ancestors but with a generosity and dedication that couldn't be matched, except maybe by her sister. What would become of her relationship with her subjects if she continued down this path? The shell of a woman she would become?

And the way Henrik snapped at her in the background only reminded her that he would own her. Neither choice was perfect, but as far as Hans was concerned, that was what had brought them together. It wasn't just the betrothal; it was also a broken childhood that they had in common and what ultimately bonded them together. Whatever the storm, Hans would help her through it. She knew more than anything else, as her courage manifested with each breath she took, what she had to do.

"This concerns the kingdoms of Arendelle and Nørdmore. _Not_ the Southern Isles. You have no right to be here!" Henrik shouted, going completely ignored.

Neither Hans nor Elsa heard anyone's objections, and the admiral simply held out his hand, ungloved and raw, to his beautiful queen. His unshakeable eyes guiding hers to his as Elsa solidified her decision.

"Elsa, stop! What are you doing?" Henrik's voice became nonexistent as her eyes locked onto Hans'. She only saw him. Only heard him. They were magnetic, and no one could stop the power of the charge or the force of the pull between them.

She placed her tiny hand in Hans', and a smile curled at the corner of her mouth, sensing the danger of her move but embracing the thrill as adrenaline pumped throughout every nerve in her body.

Her smile broadened as Hans pulled her from her seat, and he knew then that he had her, closing his hand around hers and turning to lead her out of the room, neither looking back.

A storm of voices erupted behind them as they briskly strode down the hall, hand-in-hand as Hans led the way. Both let out a huge breath once out of sight, astonished by what they'd just done, and couldn't stop grinning at each other as their pace grew quicker with each fervid step.

By the time they reached the grand staircase at the front of the castle, they were practically skipping, running towards freedom as they burst out the front doors and into the courtyard.

The rain was pouring, and they began to run faster, before suddenly realizing that there was no need to do so anymore.

Hans stopped in the center of the courtyard and whipped Elsa into his hold, wet and shivering, but they'd never been happier. Their lips crashed together, and they kissed more deeply than ever before. Every ounce of pain and regret melting away and only happiness tingling from their lips to the tip of their toes.

Anna and Kristoff ran to the front doors after they heard the commotion break out in the chambers.

"What is happening?" Kristoff asked dumbfounded and scratched the back of his neck.

Anna watched her sister surrender to the bliss she had been searching for but hadn't allowed herself to have. They were meant to be together; it was plain to see now as Hans held Elsa's face in his hands and kissed her in a way that would have made anyone jealous.

"They're in love," Anna answered simply, leaning against the doorframe and smiling at her sister's well-deserved happiness.

An angry mob of lawyers and one furious blonde prince could be heard charging towards the courtyard so Hans grabbed Elsa's hand and headed towards the gates as she lifted her skirt with the other. She giggled blithely for the first time in over a week and tried to keep up as they sprinted across the castle bridge and towards his ship. _Their_ ship.

Somewhere between the town square and the gang blank, all giddiness stopped and something more serious took over.

Elsa eagerly followed Hans down a set of stairs, kissing him from the higher steps as he fumbled to open the door to the captain's quarters. Once they stepped inside, Hans locked the door behind them, and Elsa sealed it with a thick coating of ice before their eyes locked again in harmony.

They hadn't even spoken a word to each other this entire time, but now that they were safely stowed away and standing so close to each other, it was clear where the night was headed. Before another minute passed, before someone else came into to their lives and tried to tear them apart, they were going to be together. As intimately as two people could.

A mutual look was all that was needed to convey the longing they both held in their hearts. Elsa may not have walked down the aisle, or even been a virgin anymore, but there was nothing that was going to stop this from happening.

"You sure about this?" Hans asked, still catching his breath as he sought reassurance. He wanted this more than anything but needed to make sure that there would be no room for regret later. Elsa had just walked away from a huge mess she'd have to clean up later, and he couldn't help but feel a tad bit at fault for that. Even if it was the right thing to do.

Elsa was breathing profusely, chest heaving against the ethereal fabric of her dress as if she stood on the precipice of a ravine prepared to take that leap of faith. With the truest of blue eyes and a smile beaming like the break of a morning sun, Elsa skimmed her hands up the front of Hans' smooth black coat and kissed him so gently that he sighed the moment their lips made contact. "More than anything," she affirmed without an ounce of hesitation in her husky voice.

Elsa's hands swiftly tucked under the opening of Hans' coat and gave it a good shove off his shoulders so that it plopped haphazardly onto the floor. Her fingers impatiently pulled at his ruby red cravat as Hans struggled to figure out how to undress Elsa. There was not a seam, stitch, or button to be found on the magical dress, and she giggled mirthfully as his fingers grew more frustrated in their failed pursuit. A flick of her wrist and the cravat joined the coat bunched at Hans' feet.

As lovely as the moment was shaping up to be, neither could hardly see a thing as it was still raining outside and darkness had descended over the fjord, ending another day for everyone else. Hans managed to find a book of matches and lit a few candles as Elsa patiently waited.

In the flash of a second, she was cast in breathtaking candlelight and back in possession of Hans' full attention. Elsa gracefully waved a fluid hand through her hair as she dissolved the sheath of ice from her lengthy mane, letting it fall naturally around her slender shoulders and beatific face, transforming it from mythically white to more of a light golden blonde. A halo of sumptuous locks that made her even more stunning because it was Elsa as pure and raw and stripped down as she could be. The girl he remembered and the woman he'd grown to love even more over the summer, slowly unveiling herself like she had never done before.

His leather boots tumbled to the floor once Hans shucked them off and began to unbutton his shirt, stopping halfway through when Elsa skillfully raised and then lowered a delicate hand from above her head down to her waist, commanding her dress to dissolve as her eyes found their way back to Hans and waited for his reaction.

His jaw slowly went slack as individual fragments of refracted light sparkled and melted away like a dying roman candle, exposing the vastness of her arctic white skin to him for the first time. Before long, nothing stood between Elsa and Hans' electrified eyes. Her thick sheet of glistening blonde hair covered part of her shoulders and was draped like a mermaid's down the length of her back, causing Hans' fingers to itch with a sudden impulse to run them through every strand of silky platinum. She gleamed in the moonlight as she tiptoed towards him, footsteps lighter than air and hips gently swaying enough to make Hans stop breathing momentarily.

He swallowed hard as Elsa's smile widened with a bewitching joy. She was the mythical Venus to him, shamelessly walking out of a crashing ocean as a woman ready for passion and love in its fullest form, and his heart galloped knowing he'd be the one to take her there.

She was more magnificent than he ever imagined, and he'd spent a lot of time doing so in his youth. For all the fantasies he'd ever had about this moment, none compared to the reality of seeing her completely bare and boldly ready to give herself to him without a second thought. And the darkening want in her celestial orbs made his stomach feel as if it were about to take flight.

Rarely did Hans ever feel nervous about anything, but his chest furiously hammered with anticipation as Elsa brought herself closer and seductively moved his hands away from where they were still glued to the top button of his collar. Nimble fingers went to work unbuttoning his dress shirt, her brilliant eyes lost in his as they shared a sweet smile.

Hans still had his slacks on, but Elsa needed to stop and take in his exquisite form for a moment when his shirt fell away and exposed that gorgeous body she'd seen fencing in her throne room. Except this time, it was all hers. Every time Elsa had seen Hans over the years, he had always matured wonderfully. But now that they were going to consummate their love, standing naked before him and completely willing, she was captivated by the man he'd become.

Years of hard labor had transformed Hans' body into an aesthetically pleasing v-shape- broad shoulders and narrow waist framed by defined hip bones and a trail of thick dark red hair that immediately grabbed her attention. Abdominals so perfect that they put grid lines to shame had her dizzy with desire. The scars were almost a blur, invisible to her because she loved him entirely. They'd lived through enough pain; tonight was about love.

Tender hands grazed up Hans' chest with a silk-like finesse as Elsa pressed herself against him, soft breasts melding into apricot skin as she sighed contently next to his ear.

Time stopped just then as he closed his arms around her and just held her, his warmth enrapturing her cooler frame as a sense of safety fell over them. Their lips met, and they kissed endlessly in the solace of the candlelight, remembering how many times they each had cried over the thought of this night never happening. But it wasn't long before tepid kisses found fire again and became more hungry, more needy, as Hans backed Elsa up towards the bed.

It was a small bed, barely big enough for two bodies to lay side-by-side, but that wasn't the arrangement they had in mind for the evening. Hans peeled back the blankets in one swift motion as Elsa slid onto the bed and between the soft white sheets, back curved like an archer's bow with her head resting against the lone pillow, flaxen hair fanned out like a peacock's train as she anxiously waited for Hans to join her.

A sultry look of want met Hans' pleased eyes as he removed his trousers and admired the ravishing woman tantalizingly stretched out in his bed. She was amazingly confident for being so bare in front of him for the first time. Had it been anyone besides Hans, she wouldn't have been so bold, but he evoked a natural calm in her, one whose foundation had been laid decades ago. This was destiny. And she'd wanted this since those years in her adolescence when Hans grew from boy to man in her eyes. When she saw him not just as her future husband but as her future lover as well. It was the last frontier they'd yet to venture into, solidifying their love like they'd never done before. And not one bit of hesitation dared to stop either of them.

In spite of all those who had tried to rip them apart, tried to get them to murder or execute one another, their love would prove to be unbreakable and stand the test of test time. A union so clandestine, it couldn't be dismantled by anyone, not even the lovers themselves.

Hans kicked the last remainder of his clothing to the side and stood proudly for a moment as Elsa drank in his exquisite physique. Loving someone so much made all the difference in the world. Their past, their bond, and their devotion to each other made every revealing moment worth the agonizing wait.

Sky blue eyes drifted up and down sculpted muscles and manly perfection, nibbling at her bottom lip and unconsciously flaunting her body to him with the sheet well around her waist.

A smile curled up Hans' face, wholly satisfied with Elsa's cheeky grin, as she pulled him on top of her with a buoyant giggle. That was a bold move on Elsa's behalf, but from that point on, she was in Hans' hands. Steadily, he lowered himself between her legs and she wholeheartedly wrapped those willowy limbs around his hips, inhaling a small gasp when she felt the thick of him pressing against her delicate center.

Elsa seemed to be a little more nervous now, but Hans assumed it was because of the importance of the occasion, so he took her mind off things by lavishing her lips with more impassioned kisses. Her body gently rolled against his, and Hans didn't know how much longer either of them could wait as everything seemed to be moving along rather quickly.

He pushed a single finger inside of her and was surprised when he saw Elsa wince and crudely bite her lip, like it was uncomfortable. Hans stopped and quizzically pinched his brows together. Just to be sure his hunch was correct, he tried again and pushed a second finger inside her. This time Elsa hissed sharply, and her whole body tightened. Hans then promptly removed his fingers and glanced up at Elsa's grimaced face.

"You lied to me," he said almost happily and moved so that they were face-to-face. "You haven't been with anyone."

Shyly, Elsa wet her lips and shook her head, blushing like a wildfire had bloomed over her lightly freckled cheeks. "No, I haven't."

"Why did you tell me several men had graced far more than your lips? Including your body?"

Those very same lips pulled into a frown, embarrassed about the dagger of a statement she made during their first reunion at the start of summer. "I wanted to hurt you. Because you had hurt me," her voice laced with regret.

After a moment, Hans nodded and let a small smile tug at his lips. He _had_ hurt her, and he understood. And had Elsa not been lying below him, trembling in the light of her newly disclosed virginity, he may have been more inclined to press the issue. Instead, he was elated.

"This will be more like our wedding night than I imagined. I can't tell you how much this means to me." His lips tenderly pressed to hers, and he lovingly caressed the apple of her cheek with his thumb.

Trepidation still loomed in her sparkling blue eyes. "I just… hope I can compare…" She stammered, demurely biting her lip again.

"Compare? There's no one else to compare to." His smile curled deeper, and he tried to kiss Elsa again but she was unresponsive, stuck on his last words as her eyes fixed onto the perfectly lined slats of wood above.

"What?" She mumbled against his persistent lips, face screwing up in confusion.

"I haven't been with anyone either," Hans remarked, completely unabashed.

Elsa was even more bemused now as Hans pulled away and found those sculpted brows profusely knitting together, a look of shock gracing her features.

"You're a virgin?" Still stumbling through her ambivalence, though it didn't stop Hans from kissing her. "How is that possible? You're an admiral? And a sailor before that?" All those images of Hans going port-to-port and gallivanting with various ladies flittered across her mind.

He could understand how she might have gotten that impression from his crew, but Hans wasn't one of them. "I've only ever loved you. And after everything fell apart, after the betrothal, I never had the need for intimacy. If I couldn't have you, I didn't want anyone else. Even for just one night."

Hans had never said anything more heartwarming or achingly tragic. And while Elsa had maintained a need for intimacy, she never felt ready enough for something that had once been reserved for him only. Something so sacred, that they had promised to each other, couldn't just be given away to any other man so easily.

The fast-paced mood that had swept the two up in a hurried whirlwind of lust dissolved in the light of all of these new revelations. What was going to be a torrid night of released sexual oppression was now more innocent and profound. Precious even. And everything changed to reflect the importance of making love for the first time, in all respects.

Hans illuminated with such a care and devotion about him, touching her more lovingly than before.

"We need to slow down and do this properly. Or it's not going to feel good." Hans' hand lightly played with the fringe of her soft blonde bangs that framed her face, thankful for one small moment that he thought had been taken from them.

It really wouldn't have mattered if Elsa had been a virgin, but he had grown up with the idea of her saving herself for him, for her to be his virginal bride on their wedding night. He desperately wanted to be the one to introduce her to such pleasure and unlock an unknown world of deep committed love. To be the one to cater to her every need, showing her patience and tenderness, what she deserved. In order to ease the pain, Hans knew that Elsa needed to be as aroused as possible, and so he set to work and reached back into his memory.

Back when they were younger, while Elsa spent her days studying geometry, foreign languages, and law, Hans had his own curriculum tailored around her needs. Not only was he groomed to be an excellent advisor as her consort and a fantastic ballroom dancer, but also as a fulfilling husband. Although Hans received a blunt education in marital duties, he was also handed down plenty of juicy stories from his twelve older brothers. Whenever the opportunity afforded, he asked the more willing maids and servants in the castle to express what they felt he needed to know in order to be an excellent lover. Even though he didn't have any actual experience, he had plenty of knowledge to call upon. Which certainly calmed his nerves now that he knew this was a much more paramount coupling than he'd first assumed.

Hans slowed their pace dramatically and just spent a few moments kissing Elsa deeply, easing any anxiety that may have fizzled up back below the surface until he rid her of all tension. He waited until he could feel the pull of her velvety lips against his, smiling before Hans broke away to cover her jaw and throat with burning hot kisses. Her breath vibrated beneath the slender column, shaking and hitching whenever Hans sucked and nipped ever so gently on her angel-soft skin. His hand made itself at home across the ridges of Elsa's ribcage, caressing the sensitive skin just below her breast as a preview of things to come.

An ardent tongue painted her clavicle, wet kisses smacking along the elongated bone and over the round of her shoulder. The one that had been tempting him the entire summer with the provocative neckline of her ice dress.

His trail continued down her sternum, laying searing hot kisses to the narrow chasm between her gorgeous breasts. Hans didn't even have to look up at her to know Elsa's breathing accelerated; he could tell from the rise and fall of her chest just beneath his lips. He glanced up at her anyway, just to make sure she was still enjoying herself. When their eyes met, she smiled back at him and ruffled her fingers through his damp hair, as if she wouldn't rather be anywhere else or with anyone else.

Elsa had even less experience than she'd ever let on, adventurous kissing being the most. So when his mouth wrapped around her nipple and lightly began to suckle and kiss, it was an extraordinary pleasure that gripped her with an unexpected force.

"Hans!" Elsa moaned, just above a whisper as a thrumming warmth rocketed down to her core. Her hand dug deeper into the hair at the back of his head like threads on a loom, falling into place, piece-by-piece, minute-by-minute, as the night wove itself into a culmination of a decades' worth of expectations and desires.

Hans' name repeatedly leapt from her lips, light and airy as he memorized every supple give and pull of her pristine skin. He worshiped her with his powerful hands and sumptuous mouth. And even though Elsa was always showered with respect as a high and mighty queen, the way he tended to her was something more sacred than birthright. It was a divine right, written in stars.

Blood already surged through Hans' extremities, excitement and anticipation making him punch drunk with love as his breath rushed warm against her beautiful pink nipple. Everywhere he touched her, the reaction never failed to drive him mad with pride.

Hans inched his body down the bed and ran two strong hands over her angelic body, rousing it with his electric touch. She gracefully writhed underneath him, smile slipping wider and mewling small sounds of content that were honey to his ears. She was at the gates of heaven, and he'd only just begun.

"I love you, Elsa. I love you," he whispered against her body, professing his love as he licked and kissed her from chest to navel, stopping just above her pubic bone before lifting her leg and kissing her slender white thigh with his deliciously wet mouth. Her body had begun to rock on its own, whimpering and moaning as his lips danced towards her hipbone. The ache of him being so close and not touching her where she most desired bordered on torture, Hans purposely building her up like kerosene on a fire yearning for the strike of a match.

Just when Elsa felt like she might faint from shallow breathing, Hans found that pleasure point just below the smooth knoll between her legs and began to press languid circles over the swelling bud with the pads of his fingers. She sang sweetly with each rousing pass he made, smiling into her skin as he continued to lap at the jut of her hip.

"Have you ever touched yourself before?" He asked before returning his lips to her quivering body.

"I may be queen, but I'm human as well. Of course I have," rolling her hips into his wonderfully strong ministrations.

Many a lonely night, Elsa discovered the vastness of her body's desires. The first ever being to the thought of Hans himself when they were still betrothed. He'd also been the subject of more recent nights alone as well.

"Have you?" Elsa returned, just as curious as he was to know.

"I'm human as well," getting a smile from her with that devilish smirk of his. As innocent as this all was, they both had a more lecherous side brought out by each other. Something to hopefully explore at another time.

Hans let Elsa's leg fall to the side and slowly dipped a finger back inside her. Warm and moist, her body confirmed a job well done on his part, and they were ready for lovemaking. He gleefully brought his lips back to hers, recapturing the intimacy and passion such close proximity provided.

"You ready?" He asked with the utmost care swimming in his captivating emerald eyes. Elsa gingerly nodded her head and drew in a quick breath. "You let me know if it hurts, in any way. I want this to be pleasurable. We deserve that much."

Hans couldn't deny his own nerves as he aligned himself between Elsa's slender white thighs and pressed inside her not more than an inch, stopping when he was met with resistance.

"Breathe," he reminded gently, coaching her through the pinprick of pain. When she relaxed again, Hans pushed a little further and could feel her body giving to accommodate his girth. He went even deeper when he heard Elsa moan loudly and sensually towards the ceiling, the sting of the last of her virginity falling away as a warm goodness began to fill her instead.

Fully inside her, Hans stalled and found Elsa's lips again, doting upon her in the serenity of the moment. A moment to not only let her adjust, but to also celebrate a victory, a completed union they never thought would come to fruition.

Elsa's breath shuddered against Hans' lips, and she rolled her hips into him once, testing the incredible slide his fullness provided against her most fragile of places. "I love you. I want you... my prince."

Enlivened, Hans let his hips begin a languid pace as their bodies contoured beautifully together, made for each other in every way possible.

He gave her plenty of time to find her way, guiding him with her eyes and facial expressions as the pain subsided and pleasure began to unfurl exponentially.

Every awkward moment only seemed to enhance the experience. Adjusting of bodies and breathless requests resulted from lack of experience, which was what made their coupling even more special. A sense of humor and unparalleled affection allowed the night to unfold in a way that was unique to them. Lips, tongues, and breath quickly became a heated mess of want above while the incredible pulse of euphoria pulsed steadily below.

The intensity was so great at times that they fought to keep their eyes open, savoring little moments. The crease between brows, caught between overwhelming ecstasy and the newness of each sensation. The droplets of sweat forming at Hans' hairline. The curl of Elsa's lips as she plunged into new depths of pleasure unknown. Every moment a photographic feast for the eyes.

The cold of the rain penetrating through the windows rivaled the heat kindling between them. The bed was soft but firm enough that it felt heavenly. Sweat and arousal, the perfumes of love, invigorated the scant spaces where they weren't already touching. Something beautiful was taking form. For every eloquent word Elsa had written to Hans, and for every beat of perfected poetry he'd penned for her, no words would ever be able to express what two bodies could. Every jolt of pleasure, every twinge of bliss reminded them of all they'd been through. Tragedy and trauma. Heartache and despair. Personal vendettas and decisions made out of fear. Nothing had prevailed in keeping them apart. And they held nothing back on this night of ultimate redemption, writing the story together this time.

They each gave fully. Hans worked his body so magnificently and was always rewarded by the exhilarating feeling of silky hands drifting over his rugged shoulders and back all the way down and over his masterful rear. Elsa pulled him closer as she met his thrusts with even more verve, searching for maximum contact and soaking up every bit of pleasure possible.

"I love you. I love you," Elsa panted, until her words were endless stretches of murmured breaths meant for Hans' ears only. She never stopped saying it even as he tugged on her bottom lip, the cold of his teeth setting her loins aflame. Or when she slowly let her tongue and lips caress the side of his neck and shoulder, gripping him desperately as he drove her into heaven and beyond.

It became more difficult for Elsa to keep her eyes open, the indescribable thrill of Hans valiantly pushing her closer to the edge. A rush so intense she wasn't sure if she could handle it, for the sensation of the hot burn and incredible build of nebulous heat was nothing like she'd experienced on her own.

Her eyes fluttered, but they stayed on Hans. Wordlessly adoring the smooth line of his lips, swollen from their more-than-enlivened exchanges. The heat of their passion soaked deep into the high of his cheekbones, flush with the burn of soft sensual red that she couldn't stop kissing. Aligning her lips to the scarce freckles under the most vibrant green eyes.

The sheets had fallen to the foot of the bed as their momentum grew wild. They'd passed that plateau where every bolt of pleasure was wide and expansive, taking time to enjoy the closeness, and were now throwing themselves into the ferocity that had erupted. Bodies crashed together as sounds of inexplicable joy rose to new heights. A pressure coiled deep within Hans, so great he felt like he could lose control at any moment but refused.

Elsa was already urgently keening below him, mouth never closing as the most gorgeous sounds tore from her throat between gasps for air. The force of her quake made her cling to Hans, nails biting his shoulders as her lissome body arched into his so fully that there was no separation between the two.

The pull of her spasm was enough to let Hans finally give in to that powerful build up, to flow freely with a labored groan into the golden hair bunched at Elsa's neck. With her own body tingling and melting into a sedative high, Hans let one last strangled grunt break from his throat before he collapsed onto her body where she cradled him against her breasts, laying a gentle kiss to his scorching hot forehead.

They stilled in silence, both panting as they nuzzled noses together before kissing each other with swollen lips. Smiles refused to leave their glowing faces, both awash in the radiance and exhalation of their long-awaited union.

"You okay?" Hans managed to mumble and lifted himself enough to see Elsa's face clearly, tucking a sprig of wild hair behind her ear as she beamed up at him.

"Mhmm. Sleepy," eyes unable to stay open as a small yawn escaped. Hans pecked her nose and pressed a line of tiny kisses up the ridge before he scooped her body into his to settle in for the night.

It was quiet and peaceful, morning a distant thought as they two began to drift off to sleep snuggled tightly in each other's arms.

"Goodnight, my princess," Hans whispered to a sleeping Elsa. "I love you."


	16. A New Day

The sounds of gulls circling over the harbor pulled Hans from his sleep as he lazily blinked his eyes open to see a clear blue sky out the window. His eyes then fell to the slumbering fair-skinned beauty snuggled tightly against his torso, her mellow breath tickling his chest hair as he held back a chuckle and smiled to himself.

For someone known for being the Snow Queen, Elsa was anything but that morning. She was warm and relaxed in his hold, making it irresistible for Hans to skim his fingertips down her arm and kiss her downy-soft mane. She stirred a bit, sighing softly before nestling closer to her admiral.

His chest swelled with happiness, the kind he hadn't felt in a very long time because, for all the times he'd held Elsa since his return to Arendelle, he wasn't worried about losing her this time.

Caught in his thoughts, Hans looked down to find two sleepy eyes glancing up at him.

"Good morning," he whispered and laid another kiss atop Elsa's head. His affection couldn't be restrained as every part of him strove to express the love threatening to burst from within.

"Morning," Elsa mouthed, still waking up.

"You know you look just as beautiful sleeping as you do awake?" Getting a giggle from Elsa as she stretched her legs and settled back against his body. "How do you feel?"

"Wonderful. _Womanly_ ," hint of seductress lingering in her raspy voice.

"It didn't hurt, did it?"

The night had been so splendid that Elsa actually had to think back. "A little tiny bit at first… but then…" Her eyes slipped closed as she bit her lip and made a sound fairly similar to the ones she made last night. "I never knew it would feel like that."

"Nothing like on your own?" As confident as Hans was in all other endeavors of his life, sexual performance was a new realm for him.

"Not even close," to which Hans sighed with relief. "You're strong and powerful. Fulfilling beyond belief. And it was completely different because it wasn't just about pleasure. I love you. I always have." Gentle hands pulled Hans' face in to seal her words with supple pink lips.

"You have no idea how long I've waited to hear you say that. Like this," eyes motioning to their sheet-covered bodies tangled together. "There could never be anyone else who compares to you."

Sassy as ever, Elsa rolled her eyes. "You put me on a pedestal I don't deserve. I'm not that perfect."

"And neither I am," earnestly finishing her sentence. "That's why I love you. We're imperfect, but still so great together."

Satisfied with his answer, Elsa rested her head back against Hans' chest and let herself drift away to the sound of his heartbeat cantering just below.

"I have no idea what we do now," Hans said, having no idea that last night was even going to happen until it did, and they hadn't even talked about it in depth.

Elsa lifted herself up onto her hands so that she was looking down at Hans with the most mischievous expression.

"For twenty-four years I have been saving myself for my husband. I certainly hope you don't intend on disappointing me."

"Elsa, I'm serious."

"So am I," she insisted and sat up even straighter to have a real conversation about this, tugging a sleep-heavy Hans along with her.

It was no secret that Henrik had beaten Hans to a marriage proposal simply because Hans wasn't allowed to ask Elsa due to his non-royal status. But that wouldn't hold Elsa back any longer after risking everything just to be with him.

"Hans," she said, dulcet tone rolling over him as she took his hand into her lap and curled her own around it, like he was the most coveted thing in the world to her. "Marry me."

What should have brought a smile to his face only made him frown instead. "It isn't right. I should be asking you. And with the betrothal, I never got the chance then either because it was planned for us." He was a gentleman through and through, always wanting to do things properly.

"Then as Queen, I give you permission to speak freely."

Behind closed doors, no one would ever know who asked whom or whether royal protocol was followed. If Elsa gave him permission, Hans considered his one and only chance to be genuine.

He switched their hands so that he was now holding both of hers in his own, gazing into her eyes with the purest of intentions.

"Elsa, I know I've hurt you. Our love is not a simple one. We've been brought together and torn apart, by others... as well as by myself. I only want to love you and make you happy. Elsa, will you marry me? Will you be my wife? Mother of my children? Will you let me keep my promise to you?"

In the short span of Hans' speech, Elsa felt like she'd relived every moment of their relationship in the blink of an eye. From small children to blossoming adolescents. Tragedy-stricken adults. Bitter rivals. Lovers reunited. They'd lived through a lifetime of events, and here he was opening a door to a whole new future they'd only dreamed about. The second Hans finished speaking, Elsa bit back the tears that wanted to flow and let a brilliant smile flourish across her face.

"Yes," she gushed and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Nothing would make me happier."

Morning breezed by, and the two privately celebrated their engagement curled up in each other's arms before they knew it was time to face reality and head back to the castle.

Hans' bags were never transferred out of his room the night before. Which was a huge relief to him because returning to the castle in rain-soaked clothes wasn't the impression he wanted to make. Especially if they were possibly going to confront Henrik.

The two peeled themselves off of each other, still giddy from the high of last night's events and their mutual proposal, and began to get ready for breakfast.

Hans flipped open his trunks and was able to find his best day attire. He even had a little time to shave before shining his boots until he could see his reflection. And while it wouldn't have been proper to say it out loud, the impeccable regality Hans possessed was befitting of more than just an admiral. He looked like a king.

Freshly cleaned and dressed to kill, Hans watched Elsa slink out of bed and give him one last flash of her naked backside before whirling a hand to create her usual dress. Although something very _unusual_ ended up covering Elsa's lithe body instead.

"That's a new color," Hans intoned as his eyes swept up and down her glimmering pink gown.

Elsa stood dumbfounded in front of the mirror as she turned and inspected her bemusing creation. "It materialized that color too. Normally it's teal or blue and then changes later."

She'd never considered herself a pink person. The rich purples and blues of royalty and dramatically deep chroma were her usual palette of choice. The cotton candy hue made her sparkle like a blooming rose kissed by morning dew drops, looking more refreshed, renewed, and brighter than she'd ever shined before.

"It looks _lovely_ ," Hans growled playfully and came up behind Elsa, watching their reflection in the mirror as his arms encircled her waist. He softly kissed her on the side of her neck, enjoying the hums of satisfaction beneath the thrumming skin. "What does pink mean?"

Elsa turned her head and whispered in his ear, lips tickling the shell. "I'm in love."

They finished dressing and headed up to the deck to disembark. The sun was brilliant as it welcomed another morning. The happy pair walked down the main center of a quiet Arendelle, smelling the sweet flowers being assembled at the market, giggling and smiling like a couple of school children as they strolled hand-in-hand.

"You can't even tell there was a storm last night. It's a gorgeous day," Hans exclaimed and squinted his eyes at the blaring summer sun.

"A _new_ day," Elsa proclaimed and held his hand a little tighter.

"Your Majesty. Admiral Westergard," a guard greeted outside the castle gates, and the couple relished the sound of their titles spoken in succession, embracing the thought of their relationship becoming public knowledge.

Transitioning back into the role of quintessential queen, Elsa assumed her seat at the head of the table, and Hans nervously slipped into the one nearest her, directly across from Anna who was staring at them with the most suspicious eyes.

"Good morning, to you both," Anna chimed politely as her grin spread a little wider. "Pleasant evening last night?"

"Most pleasant, thank you." Elsa playfully rolled her bottom lip between her teeth and flashed a secretive smirk at Hans, who immediately reddened to a flame once he realized Anna knew _exactly_ what Elsa was implying.

And it really took all of five seconds before Anna put the pieces together and had a pretty good idea of what transpired after the two lovebirds dashed out of the courtyard and into the pouring rain.

"Elsa, can I speak with you out in the hall?" Anna asked.

"Can it wait?" Tearing her eyes away from Hans for the first time since they sat down.

"No," nudging Elsa's foot under the table to underscore the urgency.

Breakfast hadn't been served yet, so Elsa had no choice but to reluctantly follow Anna out into the hallway and leave Hans to fend for himself with an awkward Kristoff fidgeting in his chair, trying to think of something to say but with nothing coming to mind.

Anna dragged Elsa far enough down the hall so that they couldn't be overheard, as she was sure that all of the staff was dying to know more about the huge scandal that had erupted in the castle.

"Did you sleep with him?" Anna shot from the hip without fail, throwing Elsa off and making her blanch in the wake of the question. "And don't lie," she added with a pointed finger at her sister. "Your dress is glowing so bright I may very well read by it tonight. And it's _pink_ ," fully enunciating every syllable in her best sisterly tone.

Hesitation caught Elsa's tongue at first, until she realized she didn't feel like there was anything to be ashamed about. "Yes, I did."

Anna was about to remind her sister that she wasn't married because it would have been something Elsa would have said to her if the situation were reversed. But as she looked into Elsa's eyes and saw the trepidation of such a remark brewing in her sullen blue orbs, she tucked her comment away and left the moral lecture behind for another day.

Instead, Anna let an easy smile play across her lips, and Elsa warmed in its glow, comforted by her sister's silent show of support rather than the expected ridicule she'd braced herself for. Everything was already said and done. What good did it do to make Elsa feel guilty about something that had obviously brought her joy?

"Was he gentle?" Anna asked more sweetly, at which Elsa's smile spread even wider across her face as she nodded, cheeks dusted pink with a hint of bashfulness.

"It was beautiful." And Anna smiled, not needing to know any more than that as Elsa was about to rival the color of a tomato.

"I'm really happy for you, but I'm also not so sure you've tied up all your loose ends."

Before Elsa even got a chance to reply, she could see Henrik stomping down the hall with the force of a gale hurling her way.

Without even having to turn around, Anna knew who it was and cringed up at Elsa, fearing the wrath he was about to inundate her with.

"Speaking of loose ends," she whispered. "Good luck," patting Elsa on the shoulder before ducking back into the dining room and out of the path of the storm.

"Elsa!" Henrik called out to her, anger and hurt ever so apparent in his blaring voice. She couldn't blame him for being cross with her and prepared herself for the most uncomfortable conversation of her life. "I think you owe me a _very_ good explanation for what happened last night."

"I think I owe you more than that." Henrik dropped his guard slightly once he saw that she wasn't going to fight him on the facts of the matter. "I should have never agreed to marry you. My heart wasn't in it, and I forced myself into something I didn't want."

"Forced yourself?" He questioned harshly. "From the woman who begged me for something more only to reject it in the most obscene fashion. You don't know what you want."

Elsa flinched at the accusation. "I _do_ know what I want," she countered brazenly. "And I'm so sorry that I've hurt you. I didn't foresee any of this happening when I met you."

A disquieting silence came over Henrik, his thin lips tightening into a line beneath his sandy blond mustache, eyes burning with the fuel of deceit. "A girl with a crown," he seethed under his breath.

"Excuse me?" Making it obvious she was slighted by his comment.

"A girl with a crown; that's what you are. You toy with people's hearts, claiming you want a commitment, but then you're unhappy when you get it. You do and say as you please, no matter who it hurts, and because you're queen, no one ever questions it."

Elsa had to remind herself that this was Henrik's anger talking. She'd never seen him this upset, but considering the way she'd made a fool of him, she withheld any verbal retaliation and took a deep breath. "You're upset, and you have every right to be-"

"He's a murderer!" Shouting it loud enough so that it made Hans recoil in his seat back at the dining table an entire room away. It was one thing to lose Elsa's hand to another man, but to lose it to Hans made the prince burn with anger.

"Who has he murdered? No one."

"He held a saber to your neck, and if it hadn't been for your sister, you would be dead right now, and he'd be sitting at the head of that table rather than next to the queen."

"Henrick, I'm aware. But you don't understand."

"No. I don't understand. I don't understand what I've done to drive you away and into the arms of a man like that, of all people. He tried to take your life, and you want to marry that monster!" Oh, and there was that word again. Only it wasn't in reference to Elsa this time.

"I do. Because I know a different person than the one you claim him to be." A shiver zipped up her spine, dancing sparks of pride that took even her by surprise. Every word of defense only made her realize how much she really did love Hans. So much so that she was now fighting for him. "You can stay as long as you need to make other arrangements."

Henrik balked at the offer. "Why would I stay? You've humiliated me. I'll be returning home along with Nørdmore's representative this afternoon. You'll be rid of me."

A defeated sigh left Elsa's lips. This wasn't how she'd meant for things to end. She thought back to that night when they had first met. How they'd gone after the same canapé, and before she knew it, they'd become very different people in the short span of their courtship. They were a perfect couple in theory, just not in reality.

"Henrik, I truly am sorry," Elsa offered one last time, kind eyes meeting his as the anguish dispersed from his features.

"As am I." And neither one said goodbye.

The argument was still ringing through the dining room when Elsa returned, her bubble of joy fully burst at this point.

Hans felt more out of place than ever now, even though Anna was showing some signs of sympathy in the way she was looking at him.

"I've caused some waves already, haven't I?" He asked as Elsa shook the last of her jitters away before sitting back down.

"I caused those waves, not you." She laid a hand on his thigh and gave him a small smile, assuring him that this was what she wanted. It may have been the rockier of the two roads, but she wasn't turning back.

The day grew worse, and Elsa knew it was going to reach a low point when Kai announced that the council was calling an emergency meeting and her presence was required. There was only one thing she could guess they wanted to discuss.

A hidden bob of her throat plagued the young queen as she took her seat at the head of the table in front of a handful of displeased elders. The carnation pink gown wilted back into ice blue as their unforgiving gaze rested on her tiny figure.

Elsa instantly felt small and reminded herself of her father's words when she recognized how much power her body language was surrendering.

Wetting her lips, the queen aligned her spin along the carved back of the chair, assuming the authority and respect it demanded. Her shoulders elegantly pinned back as she glanced down into her lap and forced her fretting hands to relax, smoothing them over the gelid material of her skirt.

"Gentlemen," she said firmly, but with the soft touch her voice always afforded, bracing herself for the barrage of questions she knew she had unfortunately brought upon herself. Without a reply, she pressed again. "Is there something you wish to discuss?"

The room held onto the silence for a few beats before one man sucked all the air out it with one long inhalation before speaking. "We've been informed that the engagement with the Prince of Nørdmore has been called off. And while many facets of your life are not our business, we must consider how this will affect Arendelle."

A tightening in her chest loosened, knowing that he could have come at her much harder but didn't. She acknowledged him with a nod and dipped her head to carefully consider her reply.

"You're correct. And while my reasons for making such a rash decision are not up for discussion, the unintended consequences to my people are. I don't intend to leave my kingdom destitute," Elsa proclaimed with such passion that it made a few members draw back into their seats. "I am fully committed to keeping Arendelle at the forefront of the revolution. We'll just do it another way, should Nørdmore decide to alter our political relationship."

Her impassioned speech was met with blank faces, not yet thoroughly convicted.

"I have a plan," she continued incredulously, her heart on her sleeve showing a bit more than she'd ever allowed before to such an audience. "Give me some time to work out the details, but I assure you, our goals can be accomplished without Nørdmore's assistance."

"Very well, Your Grace. We will adjourn for now and meet in a few days. At that time, I think I speak for everyone when I say that the council would _very_ much like to hear your proposal for going forth."

"Two days, and I promise a solution shall be presented."

When the meeting was over, Elsa held her stoic posture until she rounded a corner and let herself breathe a refreshing sigh of relief. Even more refreshing was the sight of Hans heading her way with the warmest expression and open arms.

"Everything alright?" He asked and held her loosely, not fully embracing her just in case a few stray council members wandered by.

"I'm fine, just a little… _tense_ ," the very words making her body do so.

"It's my fault," Hans replied regretfully as his eyes fell into a puppy dog look that melted her heart.

"No. Fault implies that we've done something wrong. This-" motioning between them with her eyes, "- _is_ right. I just have to convince the others. But I need your help."

"Anything, my Queen." Anytime he called her that it always sparked a light in her eyes. Her cheeks blushed a little darker, and she somehow found herself caressing the sleeve of his coat. Wordlessly gripped by the strength of his devotion to her after such a rough morning. "I'm always at your side."

The afternoon pressed on as Elsa retreated to her study to lay her plan out in painstaking detail. In fact, she got so caught up in her work that it wasn't until Kai called her for supper that she realized she hadn't spent any real time talking to Hans about _their_ plans.

After combing the castle and inquiring with every guard on post, Elsa was told that Hans had been spotted in the chapel of all places.

And sure enough, there he was. Just an outline of a shadow seated in the center pew midway up the aisle. Not a candle was lit, and the sun was setting, making it difficult to decipher the magnificent detailing of the staves. Twilight crept across the altar and choir balcony as Elsa approached the pew with guilt thumping in her chest.

"What on earth are you doing in here?" She asked with a chuckle. Hans was slumped back in the pew in the most unruly manner, looking nothing like the usual churchgoer about to hunch over in penance.

Tired eyes peered up at Elsa as she took a seat next to Hans and dotingly rested a hand on his thigh, the simple warmth of her concern settling nicely over him.

"I didn't know what to do with myself, and, to be honest, I was just looking for a quiet place to think."

A dull creak could be heard as Elsa adjusted herself, feeling terrible that she'd left him alone for this long.

"How silly of me to have been running around all day trying to make arrangements for us, and I completely forgot to inform my other half."

 _My other half_. He repeated it to himself a few times, letting it bring a small smile to his lips as she'd never before referred to him in such a heartwarming way. He forgave her for her absentmindedness after that.

"This morning, I was so happy, and it didn't dawn on me until I was sitting for a while that we haven't worked out any details. I mean my crew sailed home last night. I don't know what I'm supposed to do here."

As ambivalent as Hans was, Elsa knew what her heart wanted. "Exactly what we planned from the beginning," lifting her gaze to his with a veil of seriousness behind her clear blue eyes. "Be my king."

"That may have been the plan during the betrothal, but we both know that's not appropriate now."

"I know what happened was… awful," thinking back to the coronation. "There's no way around it. You were… awful. And so was your father. But I want what was taken from me. From us." Hans still didn't look like he was going to change his mind any time soon. "I'm a queen, and when I marry, you become king. It's a title I give to you. My father was king, and my mother became queen. And his parents before that. It's tradition."

"Elsa, I'm an admiral. It's not only what I love, but I've _earned_ that title on my own. Not through marriage or anything else other than hard work." It was a more-than-valid point.

"Okay," she breathed, collecting her thoughts with a consternated brow. "If that's what you want. And I have to say, stealing away a top-ranking admiral from the Southern Isles only benefits me. My admiral is so old, he's long past due for retirement."

"I'm aware," laughing along with her. "He prattles on constantly in meetings," Hans added with an incredulous eye roll.

"I had Kai move your things into the guest bedroom closest to mine. Hopefully, in time, everything will feel like home."

The chapel sank further into darkness, shadows falling over the stretch of pews as the two sat in the deafening silence that only a church could provide. It gave Elsa the time to think about how even though she wanted what they'd always planned for, time, distance, and a series of unfortunate circumstances had not only changed their original vision for the future, but had also changed who they were. No longer were they two young people dreaming their way into early adulthood.

Elsa was already queen, and they hadn't anticipated that happening until she was much older. Hans had lost his princely title but had reclaimed his dignity and found a new passion in the navy. And their reunion had come at a high political cost for Elsa after rebuking Henrik.

"It feels strange now that everything is becoming real. In a good way," Hans mused and interrupted Elsa's train of thought.

"I want to talk about the wedding. I want to make plans, but there's so much I have to do beforehand. I have to make a proposal to the council in two days' time." The strain of which was already showing on her face.

"What should I do until then?" He shrugged.

"Assume your role as Arendelle's Admiral. Tend to my fleet." She was pleased to see that Hans was excitedly grinning already. "I need your help tomorrow, but in the meantime, I can help you unpack." The way her eyes lit up and that trademark smirk of hers took over her mouth made him think she had more in mind than just _unpacking_.

Despite the different paths they had taken to get to this point, one thing was clear. As the dust was settling, and the pieces of their future were slowly falling into place, their love for each other hadn't changed. In fact it only grew stronger. Especially in the short amount of time since Elsa came to her senses and left that table to follow Hans into the rain.

"C'mon," rising from the pew in her usual elegant fashion and motioned to the door with a tilt of her chin. "Let's go get you settled in."

* * *

 _Well if you couldn't tell from the long break in updates, my baby girl came! Thank you so much to my beta let-it-geaux who helped me get the last chapter out quickly so that things weren't left on a cliffhanger, and for this chapter as well. And thank you to everyone for leaving reviews! There was a weird glitch on FF last month that prevented me from seeing them for a while. My apologies for not replying to them but I'm knee deep in diapers and waking up a few times a night. But I enjoy getting your feedback so much, so thanks again!_


	17. Valhalla

The sun crested over the fjord early that morning, promising what looked to be the warmest day of the year. Having slept incredibly well, Her Majesty awoke with the most splendid grin plastered on her face. She felt the warmth of the morning light pour through the gabled window as she turned to let familiar arms capture her in their embrace.

No "good morning's" were swapped as Elsa snuggled into Hans' sleep-warm chest, their feet finding each other's under the profusion of soft lilac bedding and rubbing affectionately together. Hans always trying to heat up Elsa's icy toes but never getting them past lukewarm.

His first night back in the castle, Hans lasted about an hour in his new room, just long enough for the candles in the halls to be snuffed out, before he snuck away to Elsa's room and joined her in bed. It was the most wonderful surprise for her. The room saturated in the inky black of night, Hans startled Elsa until she recognized his smooth hands wrapping around her waist and pulling her near as she squealed mirthfully. Hans wanted to hold her from behind, but once she knew it was him, she turned in his arms to see his handsome face.

Tiny kisses traced the edge of his sideburns as she inhaled his distinctive scent, enjoying the brush of his soft cheek against hers. Ghostly-white freckles meeting their russet counterpart. She thought back to the time when she had wistfully gazed out the window and confessed to Gerda how lonely she'd been. It was a distant memory now as Hans grazed his hand down the length of her back, no one saying anything and not really needing to.

Temptation hummed beneath their skin, but as wonderful as their first time had been, there was something just as fulfilling about the simple joy of laying together like a regular couple in love.

She wondered if Anna ever took advantage of such a luxury. To have someone so close to her every night and continue to experience the same jolting rush that now electrified Elsa. The wholeness she felt was echoed by Hans, who'd longed to escape his world of torment and start a life with his betrothed. No longer in such an arrangement, now in one by choice, he could finally breathe. The heartache that had hung so heavily in his chest began to subside. Replaced by a renewed sense of freedom and a passionate love he'd never imagined.

The past twenty-four hours were already starting to have an effect on him. He was still adjusting to thinking of Arendelle as his permanent home, but being with Elsa in private made him feel more like a man. Having her word to marry him let him focus more on the enjoyment of their time together, as they both let their guard down and left trepidation at the door.

Smiling lips met in the dark, needing no light to find their way because, by this point, they knew each other by heart. Hans held Elsa and whispered that everything would be all right; and she, in turn, couldn't stop saying how much she loved him. The two had drifted off to sleep in each other's arms, and, for once, Elsa hadn't been alone in her own room. She didn't have to dream of Hans or keep her feelings secret because he stayed with her all through the night.

* * *

After a much less dramatic breakfast than the day before, Hans kept his promise to help Elsa and accompanied her out to the harbor without question. That was until they were both standing silently in front of the pride of Arendelle's fleet when who should join them but Kristoff.

Bemused green eyes shifted between Elsa and the ship, watching her fingers play with her lips as she sank deeper into thought, pondering who knows what. She mumbled to herself and kept tracing a finger in the air as if mentally sketching out something from her mind. Finally Hans couldn't take any more of the mystery and asked what was going on.

"I need help with this ship," the Queen responded, his question unable to derail her laser-like focus.

Hans was no more enlightened than he was before. "I understand why you would need me for something like that, but what's _he_ doing here?" Gesturing to Kristoff who'd yet to say a word.

"You're an expert on ships, and Kristoff's and expert on ice," pointing to each of the men as she explained.

Hans was only more confused. "I thought _you_ were an expert on ice?"

"I'm an expert on _my_ ice," she clarified. "Kristoff is an expert on ice found in nature. There's a difference." Kristoff smiled proudly, although he didn't understand what all this was about either. "I need iron, and with the threat of Nordmøre altering our tariffs and raising the price of iron, I need to find alternate ways to bring this kingdom up to speed with the others."

A hard gulp could be heard from Hans as he came to the realization that Elsa's choice to be with him was the reason why Arendelle was in jeopardy of losing its alliance with Nordmøre. Henrik was bitter and could possibly take his resentment out on Elsa in a way that would hurt most: by letting her people suffer. And with all the talk of iron, Hans also caught on to Elsa's real reason for accepting Henrik's proposal. He was the key to the most coveted ore in the world. No wonder why she'd been so depressed during their extremely brief engagement.

"I need this ship to be able to travel to Finnmark," Elsa explained at long last.

"We already trade with Finnmark. I'm pretty sure a ship left two days ago," Kristoff added, perking up out of his daze.

"Yes, and that's because it's summer. I need it to travel there in winter. No one trades with Finnmark during that time because the waters freeze over. If we could become their only source of trade during that time, I'm sure they'd cut us a fair deal on their iron supply. It's the only other ally that has iron mines. So I need you," looking at Hans, "to help me figure out how to redesign this ship, using my ice, to make it strong enough to pass through icy waters."

Charged with the surprisingly monumental task, Hans crossed his arms over his chest and studied the ship for the longest time. "You need to reinforce the hull. The ice will tear right into the sides."

"Like this?" An elegant twirl of Elsa's wrist encased the bow of the ship and brought it to a sharp point that she thought would be appropriate enough to break through ice.

"No. It needs to be rounded to push the ice out of the way, and it needs to wrap around the entire ship to distribute the weight. Otherwise it will make the bow too heavy and offset the ship's balance."

Elsa couldn't deny how distractingly captivating Hans was once he started talking about physics but forced herself to stay on task as Kristoff chimed in.

"And a pointed bow won't cut through ice. The pressure is too great. Hans is right; the bow needs to be round." _Hans is right._ Something none of them thought they'd ever hear out of Kristoff's mouth, but the three proved to be a great team, and their brainstorming continued to build steam.

"You also need to insulate the inside somehow, or the crew is going to catch hypothermia going that far north in the winter," Hans added, shivering at the thought.

"Okay," Elsa intoned critically and shifted her weight to one leg with a pop of her hip. "But it can be done?"

Hans and Kristoff shared a look, wagering they could work together for Elsa's sake. "I don't see why not," Hans said, taking the edge off Elsa's worry. "We have a few months before the water freezes to perfect the design. We can have the shipwrights from the Southern Isles assist as well." The fact that Hans would call in a favor to the Southern Isles had Elsa beaming, as a queen but even more as his fiancée. Thrilled that he was coming to her side like he'd always promised her he would. "It also needs a name," he pointed to the ship as it rocked in place.

Elsa took a deep breath and thought hard. Something that reflected Arendelle's history. Something that inspired. Something her father would have approved of. And then it came to her as she smiled with deep satisfaction.

"Valhalla."

* * *

The rest of the afternoon was spent putting the parts of Elsa's proposal together. Since Aldridge had been the one to witness the new machinery and assembly lines abroad, Elsa enlisted him to help her figure out how to bring such advances to Arendelle. With the help of kingdom's best artist, Aldridge did his best to describe what he'd seen while the artist worked to create references sketches to present to the council.

Within two days' time, as promised, Elsa was more than prepared to floor the council with Arendelle's survival plan. Sketches in hand, Hans gave Elsa a good luck kiss before she made her way to the council chambers, a sly smile of confidence and body language that screamed "reigning queen" catching the eye of every member.

Elsa poised herself as she assumed her seat at the head of the table, chin held high with her hands primly folded in her lap. Her visage exuded that of a queen, an air and power that not only came from years of tutelage under her father but also from knowing that she had been ordained by a higher power to lead her people. And lead she would.

Skeptical eyes glazed over the young monarch as she laid out the foundation for the plans she'd vehemently promised the eagerly awaiting elders. Age was no limitation for Elsa's extraordinary creativity and resourcefulness, raising a few impressed brows as she proceeded through the details.

First, Arendelle needed to find an alternate source of iron. Elsa went on to explain her idea to trade with Finnmark year-round in order to secure the iron Arendelle needed in place of Nørdmore's. In the meantime, the queen proposed making whatever upgrades they could by using her ice to make the necessary parts. It was only a temporary solution, as ice didn't have the properties that iron did; and it would ruin the existing wood-made production lines, but it would buy her some valuable time.

Once a reliable source of iron was secured, Arendelle would need a cast iron foundry and cinder mill to produce the parts. Tapping additional waterfalls in the area would provide the necessary power to run the machinery at each facility.

The final part of her plan included taking Arendelle's most coveted goods and expanding their trade routes to more remote destinations. Timber, cheese, salmon, and an array of other fish were the kingdom's prized goods. However, even when packed on ice, the shipments could only last a few days before the product would begin to rot due to warming temperatures as the ship traveled south.

The only plausible solution was to transport the perishables using Her Majesty's ice. Encasing the shipment containers and packing them in unmeltable ice meant being able to trade for more exotic goods that captured a high price up north. Thus providing a cash surplus for the kingdom to facilitate and assure the plan's success.

A deafening quiet followed the queen's rousing speech, and she knew it meant she had surpassed their expectations. The terror of letting her people down had driven her to accept an offered hand in marriage that she'd had little desire to take, but it ultimately led to one of her finest moments as Queen.

One by one, each member of the council approved the proposal and praised the queen for her magnificent work. One gentleman even stated that such ingenuity must have been hereditary because it was so exemplary of the kind of quick wit her father was known for in his time. That compliment alone made Elsa feel like turning Henrik down was probably one of the best things she could have ever done because she proved to herself just how self-reliant she could be. The fact that she also got to marry the love of her life only sweetened the deal.

* * *

With the endless parade of meetings finally over, Elsa dragged her emotionally exhausted self upstairs to enjoy supper in her room with Hans followed by a hot bath that she prayed would extinguish any and all remaining stress from the arduous day. That was until Kai informed her that there was one last meeting to attend before the day was through.

"It's not on the schedule," she threw back grumpily, too tired to entertain the very idea of stomaching one more meeting.

"Nevertheless, Ma'am, your presence is required. And that of Admiral Westerguard."

 _Great_. This was probably something military-related, and Elsa just didn't have the stamina for such an event after all she'd endured, even with Hans by her side.

"No," she protested with a childish pout.

"You won't regret it," the kindly servant tried with a suspicious grin, one that Elsa knew meant Kai was up to something.

"Fine." She despised how he could talk her into things so easily. "But I still want a bath drawn when I return."

Kai dismissed her shortness, as she'd been through a trying day. "As you wish, Ma'am."

With a frustrated huff, Elsa did an about-face and headed down to the Great Hall where the mystery meeting was to be held. Hans was already waiting at the closed doors; and, even though they were brought together for yet another meeting, Elsa enjoyed the fleeting opportunity to hold his hand for a few moments before being formally announced.

Upon entering, they were baffled to find one long table at the center of the room. Various members of the Royal Household were all seated on one side with two lone armless chairs on the other.

The pair was asked to take a seat, and both obliged willingly. For some strange reason, every single member of her staff had glowing smiles, which only beamed brighter once the couple had made their entrance, on their faces.

"I'm sorry, but could someone explain to me the purpose of this meeting?" Elsa's voice echoed across the room and was met with the same jovial faces smiling even broader.

"The staff has been informed that we have a wedding to plan. We're here to help put your wishes into action, M'lady," the Master of the Household announced with great enthusiasm.

Kai sat down next to Gerda and happily chimed in. "Everything and _anything_ you want for this most special day is yours," sounding less like a private secretary and more like a proud uncle.

It took a moment for his words to sink in, but when they finally did, Elsa could hardly breathe, her diaphragm seizing in surprise as she stared dumbfounded back at her staff. It was only when Hans reclaimed her hand and interlaced their fingers tighter than the lengthy plait spilling over Elsa's shoulder that the true meaning and magnitude of the meeting hit with her, pricking her eyes with the threat of joyful tears as she smiled up at Hans.

He was equally as excited as she. All of the battling to convince the council that Elsa could run a kingdom without Nørdmore's help had really put a damper on their short-lived celebration. But this was their moment. All of the waiting, dreaming, and hoping was finally going to culminate in an actual event.

"We have the details from the original wedding plans drawn up by your father," Kai continued. "Though we ventured to guess that you might have something completely different in mind."

In truth, Elsa always had very specific ideas for each social event Arendelle put on, and she was known for being a bit of a taskmaster. Kristoff would surely attest to that. However, the mention of her father drew her interest as she leaned in with a curious expression tense across her brows.

"What does it say?" She asked wistfully, holding back the sting of emotion his absence always invoked.

"A classic white wedding with no expenses spared. A formal dinner the evening before to entertain close family and important heads of state. In the morning, a traditional service was to be held during the ceremony. Followed by a lavish reception here in the Great Hall in the evening. It was to be a celebration of the kingdom…" stalling for a moment, "...and of his daughter's newfound happiness."

The queen was silent, overcome with sudden bittersweet emotion, though she kept it well restrained. Hans wrapped a comforting arm around her and sweetly kissed her temple, for he too recognized not just the loss of Elsa's father but also for the wedding that would have been.

Those plans had been for both of them, and he was equally affected by hearing the late king's wishes for the day he would have given away his eldest daughter to be Hans' wife. Agdar himself handwrote the very paper from which Kai read. Page after page of what was to be a celebration only rivaled by Elsa's coronation in grandeur.

"Keep the plan," Elsa said and smiled fondly. "I want to incorporate as much of my father's vision as possible." She turned to Hans and smiled even wider at her future husband. "Though I think we have some ideas of our own."

"Excellent," the master of the household bellowed and picked up a quill. "Let's start in a very simple arena: the cake."

The head of her kitchen was on the far end of the table and began to take over the planning. "Your Grace, for the reception, we'll have Arendelle's usual offering of bundt cakes, petit fours, and truffles. To name a few. What kind of cake would you like for the main piece?"

Before answering on behalf of the two of them, Elsa once again turned to Hans and searched his eyes for any inkling of input.

"Chocolate," Hans answered promptly. "You love chocolate, don't you?" The last part spoken quietly enough just for Elsa to hear.

She nodded blithely, shedding her queenly demeanor as glimpses of how they were as a couple in private began to surface in front of the staff. And it was adorable.

Elsa's fingers absentmindedly played over Hans' knuckles, and her eyes became more dreamy as they got swept up it pre-matrimonial bliss. The admiral's cheeks pinked mercifully as he lovingly held his future bride in his arm. They were like anyone else in that moment. Just two young people in love, fawning over each other in the most affectionate way.

"Chocolate it is," the chef declared. "Is there a specific color you'd like?" Directing the question to Elsa.

"What did my father want?"

Kai shuffled through the notes in front of him. "Purple. Like the crocus."

"Purple then," she exclaimed, getting a nod of approval from Hans.

"Is there anything else Your Majesty or the admiral would like to add?"

Hans jumped at the offer and cleared his throat. "I'd like to also have a kransekake served. It's traditional in the Southern Isles. And it tastes delicious as well."

He glanced at Elsa for her approval, and she had to fight to keep her lovesick expression under control. The idea that this affair was going to be a blend of tradition and their own personal styles couldn't have pleased her more. Other men may have just left the details to their brides, but Hans took the occasion seriously. Because this was a day he'd waited a lifetime for as well.

"Let's talk about flowers. The bride's bouquet is traditionally crocuses. Being queen, there's not much we can do to change that. As for the men, what do you have in mind for the boutonnières?"

As queen, Elsa would have had an opinion; but, as a woman, she felt her fiancé's opinion was equally, if not more, important on such a matter.

"What's traditional in the Southern Isles?" She quietly asked Hans.

"The marguerite daisy. Which I have no interest in wearing," giving a roll of his eyes. She laughed at his honesty. It wasn't the most attractive flower.

"Then what?"

He thought for a moment, and there was only one answer he could come up with. "Reinroses."

She couldn't have thought of a more perfect flower herself. "Reineroses." And with a nod from Kai, it went down in the notes.

"Your Majesty, royal protocol requires a new gown be fashioned for you since Princess Anna wore your mother's for her wedding. The seamstresses will discuss more details in private to keep the gown a surprise for your groom." Hans' stomach tickled with butterflies as his mind flooded with all sorts of images of Elsa in a flowing white dresses. Especially since he was sure she'd add her own personal, _magical_ , touches to it as well.

The meeting went on for another good hour, Hans and Elsa walking the staff through their ideas for everything from vows to tableware. Music, guests, and, last but not least, the date.

With their betrothal having been so long, both Elsa and Hans preferred a date sooner rather than later. After some discussion with the staff as to the minimum amount of time needed to pull off such an extravagant affair and allow enough time for guests to make travel arrangements, they settled on a date six weeks out, and the countdown officially began.

* * *

Supper was brought up to Elsa's room sometime later. It sat untouched on a serving cart while Hans caught the last glimmer of the sunset before it slipped behind the mountains. Elsa stood over the two servings of food and plucked the silver dome cover off one of them. She stared unenthusiastically at the dish. Mutton, Hans' favorite. And suddenly she felt a flicker of boldness rush across her body. Emboldening a hunger of a different kind thanks to all of the wedding planning that made her dizzy with excitement.

"Want to join me for a bath instead of dinner?" She offered with a coquettish smirk and placed the cover back over the plate.

It didn't take much convincing before Hans walked to the washroom and stripped himself to relax in a steaming hot bath. Fervid heat soaked deep into his tired muscles as he watched Elsa's magical dress disappear with a simple flick of her hand, leaving only celestial white skin for his eyes to feast on.

She smiled deviously over her left shoulder, meeting Hans' glare which burned hot against her flesh. A whirl of her wrist freed her braid as she caught her reflection in the mirror and remembered how she'd lost herself to the thought of Hans' eyes and hands discovering every sumptuous curve and uncharted plane of her body.

Now, as she turned on the balls of her feet and tiptoed doe-like to the porcelain tub, that thought was no longer a fantasy. Reality was a strapping redhead waiting naked as the day he was born for her with a cheeky grin pulling at his lips. Perhaps ready for something more adventurous than their previous times together.

As queen, Elsa had the largest bathtub in all of Arendelle, and with Hans taking up at least two-thirds of the space, it ensured enough room for the two of them while still being intimately connected along limbs, and, if things were headed the way Hans hoped, lips and bodies would follow soon enough.

Occupying the opposite end, Elsa ensconced herself between Hans' outstretched legs and dipped her head back into the water, emerging with saturated locks and skin that glistened like open water kissed by the remaining light of sunset.

Seeing someone bathe was a glimpse into a private moment only a chosen few ever witnessed. Besides handmaidens and infant siblings, this was the only time such a ritual had been shared with a lover for both.

"Wash my hair?" She asked seductively and handed Hans a thick bar of soap.

As Hans lathered the soap into a frothy cream and massaged it into Elsa's hair from scalp to ends, he felt a sort of serenity. Not only because he was caring for her, laving her clean like a doting fiancé would. But it also gave them a chance to see a new side of each other. No one saw the queen naked with wet hair, her face devoid of any makeup. And it was almost a shame because Hans found her even more breathtaking in her natural splendor.

Enjoying his task, Hans carried on and rinsed her hair with a pitcher of clean water that had been sitting on a side table before lying back against the tub to admire his work once he was done.

"You look like a mermaid," he commented with a cocked brow directed at the long blonde hair aimlessly floating atop the waterline. Clearly a look Hans fancied.

"Don't mermaids lure sailors to their deaths?"

"I think you're thinking of sirens. Mermaids are actually known for _saving_ sailors, leading them to safety from menacing storms." He stopped to tuck a dripping forelock back into place with a purposeful smile twisted about his lips. "The sailor would then be indebted to such a beautiful creature. Either way, I think I'm in trouble here."

"Are you saying you're indebted to me?"

"Something like that." He didn't dwell on the thought much longer, quickly finding himself distracted by Elsa's lips on his own and how she lightly tugged at his lower lip back with what he could have sworn was a growl.

There was something different developing between them in the sweltering heat of the washroom. The excitement brought on by wedding planning was still very much alive but had congealed into a more _risqué_ mood that was growing stronger with each flirtatious glance.

Their first time together had been passionate but very innocent and patient. No longer novice lovers at the precipice of the unknown, Hans and Elsa quickly learned that they had a more thrilling, _salacious_ chemistry simmering beneath the surface. A stark contrast to the sickeningly sweet relationship Kristoff and Anna had most of the time. A quiet bath was a pleasant change of pace for the adventurous couple, but it was no less erotic.

Saturated with a heated flush over his cheekbones, Hans rested comfortably against the tub like he was enjoying a sunny day at the beach. He practically salivated as Elsa glided forward and straddled him in order to lay her body up against his like two cards flush in a deck.

It was a dangerous position, her slender body splayed out over his torso with that coy look glinting in her eyes and over every gorgeous feature of her face. Draped in such a way that Hans when glanced down, he could see the waterline dancing around the swell of her breasts pressed into his chest. He could already feel his arousal grow with her hips pressed so firmly against his.

"This may be the worst idea I've ever had," Elsa muttered and glanced down between them.

Hans laughed low in his belly. "Or the best."

"We have six weeks until the wedding," she added, her tone sounding like a warning.

"And…?"

She pulled back to show her seriousness and Hans pouted at the loss of contact. "And I'm a queen with powers. I just walked away from an arrangement that would have vastly benefited my people to marry a man who some know tried to take my crown. I can't add a misbegotten child to that list."

"Elsa, we've _already_ been together once," trying to kiss her again but coming up short as she pressed her finger to his lips.

"I know, but I don't want to increase the risk until that date is closer."

They were quiet for a moment, until Elsa trusted Hans enough to remove her finger and allow him to speak.

"We'll behave," he began, getting an approving smile from Elsa. "But we can still have fun," finishing with a dubious grin. _This really was a bad idea_ , Elsa thought as she felt her willpower slowly abandon her.

Hans proceeded to slouch further down into the water, face-to-face with perky breasts and decidedly kissed one of the rosy buds before taking it into his mouth. Elsa gasped sharply and curled forward, burying her nose in copper as she kissed the dewy sweat forming on his forehead.

She clutched his face between her hands, breath steaming in the narrow void between them as they began to writhe against one another. Slow pendulant movements that became strong enough to carelessly slosh the water over the edge of the tub. Hans was terribly impatient after so much wedding talk that he couldn't help but think how easy it would be for him to slip inside of her and forget about everything else.

" _Ohhhhhh,"_ Elsa whined into his mouth as their feverish canting increased, the sound quickly smothered by another bruising kiss.

Hans' heart pounded like a locomotive, and his head clouded with a lustful fog. He thought he could control himself enough to keep temptation at bay; but, if he didn't act fast, everything could turn ravenous in a hurry.

Hating himself but knowing he had to, Hans grabbed Elsa's undulating hips and forced them to stop along with his own.

"Stop! Oh, God, I love you, but we have to stop before I do something we'll both regret."

Elsa's heart thundered in her chest as she realized how carried away they had gotten. Her eyes fell to the space where their bodies met, disappointed at how quickly she almost disobeyed her own warning.

"Maybe we should get out," she lamented, sitting back on her heels. Hans agreed, and the bath- and fun- was sadly over.

Both grabbed towels and dried off, the buzz of blinding want still ricocheting inside their unsated bodies.

Elsa discarded her towel for a robe while Hans wrapped his around his waist, exposed chest moist and hot. Undeniably still tempting as Elsa tugged him to her and pouted.

"Six weeks is such a long time," she sulked and let her fingers meander over the smattering of umber freckles along the top of each of his shoulders.

"It's torture of a different kind," Hans remarked, Elsa feeling bad about both references. "But we can do this. We have to."

* * *

 _Alright, so a bit of an in between chapter as we go into the second arc. Fair warning that this thing is about to get a lot more, well...hot. (This is Helsa fic afterall)_

 _Fun facts:_

 _-Valhalla's new design is based on a Norwegian ship called the Fram. It sailed farther north and south than any other wooden ship and is housed in the Fram Museum in Oslo._

 _\- The Royal Household and Master of the Household is a real thing in both the UK and Norwegian monarchies._

 _I would like to thank let-it-geaux for betaing this (I gave her plenty to do with my baby brain taking over) and to Rick Steve's Europe for enlightening me on Norwegian trade and what the hell a cinder mill was._

 _Have a great weekend!_


	18. Backwards and Forwards

A week passed and wedding invitations were sent out across the land before the ink from the calligrapher's quill even had a chance to dry. A rush to put on the event of the decade had the staff furiously working overtime.

With so much going on in the castle it gave Elsa and Hans the perfect opportunity to throw themselves into work and help keep their minds off more _amorous_ activities. Even the smallest kiss or blandishment of the other could very well set off a chain reaction that ended up with the two of them disappearing into their bedchambers for a good part of the afternoon.

They hadn't shared a bed together in several nights, attempting to abate the burning desire to recreate that wonderful night out on Valhalla, now so aptly named. Only it left each of them feeling just as lonely as they had been before their engagement, and the fear that the next five weeks was going to feel longer than the past twenty-four years was starting to become an unsettling reality.

* * *

Entrenched in his new morning routine, Hans proudly walked the deck of each ship in his new fleet as the crew did a thorough round of maintenance and cleaning. Hands clasped behind his back, the admiral scrupulously inspected their work and took great care to acknowledge the hard-working sailors of Arendelle. Hans was the sort of admiral that insisted on a properly working ship and in the finest condition. His fleet was his pride and having it look its best was extremely important to him. Even more so because it had been entrusted to him by the queen herself.

The town bustled to life as noon approached, the clock tower eventually striking twelve as it welcomed Hans' lunch hour. As he walked up the docks he was surprised to see Elsa merrily strolling down the center of town accompanied by Anna and a lone guard, their girlish giggles flittering over the sounds of the crowded marketplace. Both of their arms were stuffed with books, so Elsa was forced to use her chin to motion for Hans to come join them.

As soon as he headed over, Anna stepped away from Elsa's side and said she'd meet up with her later, making it painfully obvious she didn't want to be around Hans more than she had to. Anna was already making that clear at each and every meal they sat for. She didn't outright ignore Hans but her comments were always clipped and she usually kept her eyes off of him, choosing to focus on Elsa or Kristoff instead. It didn't escape either Hans or Elsa that Anna was struggling to adjust to their engagement, and he secretly wished that she was more accepting of him as her sister's betrothed.

"I scared her off again, didn't I?" Hans bemoaned as he chivalrously took a few books off of Elsa's towering load, carrying them for her as they dawdled behind Anna.

"No, she's just…" But Elsa couldn't think of a good excuse fast enough. "She's just Anna," was the best she could do, and it didn't rid Hans of the guilt he felt weighing so heavily on his heart.

"Where are you headed?" He asked, changing the subject.

"To the library to hand out books to the children."

Hans furrowed his brows at the smiling queen. "For free?"

"Of course," she replied. "How are you supposed to have dreams and hopes and wishes of you can't even escape into the fantasy of a good book every once in awhile?" Her answer pleased him, her selflessness knowing no bounds, and he smiled back affectionately. "You should join me," she insisted with a nudge of his arm.

Hans' mouth dropped open to decline, not wanting to upset what appeared to be a sisterly outing, but couldn't refuse the chance to see Elsa interact with her people, especially the youngest of them.

"I'd love to."

Upon arriving at the library, a swarm of children gathered around the queen's billowing blue gown, their arms straining not for a book but for hugs from their beautiful queen. It gave Hans the impression that this wasn't the first or even tenth time Elsa had made a gesture like this. The children absolutely adored her and Anna as they fought for attention and impatiently tugged on their skirts.

The queen and princess knew each child's name and asked them about school and family, taking time to give each one their own personal book and a few moments to feel special. Arendelle was a kingdom that didn't have any poverty but the queen still made it a point to place special importance on education by providing every child with what they needed. Books, clothing, food. Whatever her youngest subjects lacked, she spared no expense to make sure they had it.

Busy being captivated by Elsa's charisma around the children, Hans was startled when a young boy pulled at his coat sleeve for a book.

"You're a captain?" The boy asked with wide eyes as Hans slipped a book into his tiny hands.

"I'm an admiral," sounding more like a parent than a man of the navy, high tone and overly dramatic inflections that made the boy grin in awe. "That means I'm captain of _all_ the ships."

The youngster gasped. "Wow!" And it dawned on both Hans and Elsa that while a queen was a terrific role model; little boys still gravitated towards big strong men, like Hans.

"You're good with them," Elsa whispered in his ear. Hans didn't even have to look to know that she was grinning ear-to-ear with pride. Surely seeing him interact with children was making her think of having their own.

It was true. Elsa had been so consumed with her duties and wedding planning that she hadn't had time to daydream about the future much. As Hans knelt down to the young boy and began to talk with him, Elsa stood starry-eyed next to Anna while she imagined Hans with their own child. A sister was an irreplaceable gift but a family of her own, with Hans, was something she'd always dreamed of.

All out of books, the sisters stopped to watch a crowd of boys form around Hans as he retold daring tales of his battles out at sea. It was refreshing to see him so carefree with such a captive audience. Elsa determined right then and there that he was not only going to be a good father but a great presence in the kingdom as well.

When the last book had been handed out the three of them began to say their goodbyes and head out, but not before an old woman stopped Hans.

"I remember you," she rasped and smiled so wide that it crinkled her eyes at the outer corners. "You once gave me a cloak during that time we had winter in summer," playfully winking at Elsa and sparing her any embarrassment about accidentally freezing the kingdom three years prior.

"You gave her a cloak?" Anna asked, mildly shocked.

" _And_ soup," the woman added cheerily and patted her stomach. It had been a pretty tasty soup as she recalled. "He gave some to everyone."

Both Elsa and Anna now wore the same flabbergasted expression as they turned to Hans.

"What is she talking about?" Elsa inquired with a quizzical tilt of her head, eyes jumping between Hans and Anna.

"When you exiled yourself, Anna went to find you and left me in charge of Arendelle. People were freezing cold and I was just trying to help them stay warm."

He spoke so modestly for such a generous act. Neither girl had ever known of Hans' good deeds in their absence, proving that there was still a decent man buried beneath the hollow assassin his father had twisted him into. If there was one way to further endear him to Elsa even more, taking care of her people was a sure-fire way. It reminded her of the Hans _she_ knew, had _always_ known. And the one Anna was just beginning to come to understand.

* * *

Despite the lack of physical intimacy that Hans yearned for with Elsa, he was feeling more at home in Arendelle as the days passed by. His punctuality and knack for independence proved to be an asset to Her Majesty's navy. Each morning, sometimes even before dawn, Elsa could see him out her bedroom window readying his ships and crew for a full day's work. The smile that curled across her lips was that of a proud queen and a jovial lover. It pleased her greatly to see him becoming such an integral part of her kingdom, giving Arendelle the opportunity to see man she loved for who is really was.

Hans even kept his promise to the queen and by the end of the week a shipwright from the Southern Isles had arrived; ready to help morph Valhalla into the ice-breaking ship of dreams Elsa so desperately required it to be. The queen was so heavily depending on Hans for this venture, more than she ever had on anyone else before. As ruler, she alone usually bore the responsibility of her kingdom, with the occasional exception of Anna, but was finding that she and Hans made such a great team that she actually looked forward to him being her additional right hand in all matters.

Accompanied by Kristoff, the royal couple gathered around a stack of unrolled blueprints in the queen's study, trying come up with the perfect design to open the trade route to Finnmark. The four of them toiled away into the night until the candles were down to the last inch of wick and flickered with the threat of darkness. By morning, tired and weary, they finally had a solution they were sure would work.

* * *

Things seemed to be slowly coming together for the couple. There were hitches in their plan that still needed to be smoothed out but in the meantime, Elsa did her best to fulfill every role in her life; queen, fiancée, sister, and of course, auntie.

Crouched down on the plush red carpet of the lamp lit hallway, Elsa was busy conjuring a waterfall of shimmering snowflakes, trickling down and dissolving as her magic created the ultimate enticement for the mystified prince, who was sprawled out on the floor with his full belly tilting him around like a table top with one leg shorter than the rest.

"Come on, Kristian. Come get the pretty snowflakes. _Ooooh_ , they look so sparkly!" Elsa cooed enticingly to the baby as he wobbled onto all fours.

For weeks Kristian had been teasing everyone by propping himself up onto his hands and knees but then never crawling. Fortunately for him, his auntie had the best tricks up her magical sleeve to get a stubborn six-month-old moving.

"I know you want to play with them! Come on!" Elsa drummed her fingers against the carpet out in front of Kristian, conjuring tiny bursts of snowflakes to encourage him forward.

Kristian giggled and babbled with excitement, entirely mesmerized by the shiny shapes. He bounced back and forth on his hands and knees and then _finally_ moved an arm out to capture a fading snowflake.

"That's it! Just a little more." Elsa moved her hand back and continued to light up a path away from the baby.

One hand movement jump-started his wobbly legs and soon Kristian was slowly crawling with all the grace and balance of a newborn foal.

"Yes! Kristian, that's it!" Elsa trilled with excitement, her face lighting up as if it were her own son on the move. "Anna! Anna!" The named echoed through the hallways but Anna didn't answer. A flash of red hair dashed out from around the corner but it didn't belong to her sister.

"What's wrong?!" Hans cried as the thudding of his boots announced his arrival, worried by the way Elsa has been frantically yelling for her sister and oddly crouched over Kristian on the floor.

By this time Kristian had tuckered himself out after only moving a few inches and plopped back onto his belly with a waning gurgle.

"He's crawling!" Jumping to her feet and whipping her head back to Kristian, who was now pooling drool down his chin and onto the floor. Like mother like son. "Well, he _was_ crawling. I can't believe Anna missed it." Elsa picked up the tired infant and brought him over to where Hans was standing at the end of the hall.

"I believe I saw her and Kristoff heading into the village. Taking advantage of the time alone I suppose," he rejoined with a shrug and lopsided smile.

His heart was beginning to settle down after sprinting up two flights of stairs to reach Elsa, but he was suddenly struck by the sight before him. Elsa had Kristian perched on her hip, popping it out to better support him, as she cooed and fawned over her baby nephew. If Hans thought Elsa was great with the children at the library, she was a born natural with Kristian. He could tell she loved him almost as her own. And then he corrected himself. _Their_ own.

Mouth agape, Hans admired Elsa's blithe smile as she dotingly swept her hand over the baby's round head and kissed his chubby pink cheeks like she was going to eat him whole. All while cooing to him in a voice so high and melodically sweet that he couldn't help but feel vicariously comforted by it. It was so… _motherly_.

"What?" Elsa asked when she caught him looking dreamy-eyed at her.

"Don't you look good with a baby in your arms?" He answered smoothly. The flattery in his tone made her blush, whispers of crimson vividly blooming across the apples of those high cheekbones of hers. All at once they were both thinking about their own family, little redheaded or blonde babies running around the castle grounds, and it caught Hans, in particular, by surprise at how extremely happy it made him to know they would have that; a family of their own.

Fighting her bashfulness in the glow of Hans' dazed expression, Elsa scooted Kristian up a little further and smiled back at the man who would be the father of her children. She let him soak in her maternal side and dream away about their future. Refraining from sex was even harder knowing that such a beautiful act could end in the familial happiness Anna and Kristoff enjoyed with Kristian. Thinking of their child as the heir to the kingdom didn't even cross their minds. Their baby would be a culmination of the love between them. Proof that nothing could conquer their love.

Elsa demurely dipped her chin as her shyness got the best of her. "I've never seen you smile at me like this before," blushing more profusely, even though it felt amazing to be admired in such a way.

"I've never seen you hold a baby before. It does something to me."

The indescribable allure of a woman holding an infant child almost made Hans want to chide himself for finding it sexy. But he couldn't help it. Elsa was the epitome of beauty and sensuality to him, and the thought of her pregnant and bearing his child only made her more irresistible to him.

* * *

Another week came to an end with more wedding planning. Huddled around the dining room table, the couple-to-be began to salivate as the head chef placed a platter of various cakes and fillings, all divided into sample-size portions, in front of the wide-eyed pair. When Hans thought Elsa wanted chocolate cake for the reception, he had meant just that, chocolate cake with chocolate filling. But the queen's regal palate was far more sophisticated than a mundane chocolate-on-chocolate affair.

Before them was dark chocolate, Bavarian cream, vanilla, buttercream, lemon, raspberry, chocolate mousse, and by the time the chef got to German chocolate filling, Hans was too overwhelmed to remember half of what the chef had said before he left the room. However, he knew his diligent bride would handle everything, as she usually did when it came to such matters. He cherished her attention to detail. They were quit well matched in that respect.

"I think we should start with vanilla and work our way around to the dark chocolate," Elsa suggested and waved an easy hand clockwise over the decadent morsels before lifting her knife to spread a pad of creamy vanilla filling onto a square of chocolate cake.

"As you wish," Hans replied and thus began Elsa's quest to find the perfect combination for their perfect day. Whatever she suggested, Hans enthusiastically devoured and gave her his honest opinion. Vanilla was too plain and dark chocolate was too rich, and they both ended up torn between chocolate mousse and raspberry preserve.

"Just taste it one more time and try to imagine having it after a savory plate of mutton," Elsa pleaded and prepared another taste of the chocolate raspberry combo with her knife. He loved her but the woman was so indecisive that this was the third time Hans had sample that specific pairing. Except this time, with the chef now gone, she kept the cake between her slender fingers and fed it to Hans. Her sly smile just as sweet as the zest of the gelatinous raspberry coating his mouth as Elsa's eyes glinted with a flicker of mischief.

Hans politely licked his lips and tried his best to imagine the dessert following his favorite supper. "I still love the chocolate mousse. It's sweet. It's creamy. Just the right amount of richness."

Elsa seemed displeased with the whole ordeal, unable to make a decision, and her eyes shifted bewilderingly across the table. She stewed over stately matters in less time than she had devoted to this cake.

"I know," she mumbled and puffed out a dismaying sigh in time to a shrug.

"Why don't you tell me?" Hans' interest in cake had been dwindling up until the spark of enjoyment he'd experienced from tasting Elsa's fingers, and he was suddenly tempted to return the favor.

Another swirl of raspberry was piled on top of the remaining bite of cake and Hans presented it to Elsa's mouth with that unmistakable twinkle in his eyes.

One touch of her gorgeous lips against his fingers as he fed her had him aching for more. The brush of soft lips as they wrapped around his offering had him suppressing a groan but when she sighed in pleasure, Hans couldn't hold himself back any longer.

The whole idea of refraining from sex forced them to keep all other physical affection to a minimum because even the slightest graze of one's hand against the other's could stir the passion enough to break all rules. It was ridiculous because they were in the same situation they were before their engagement. No touching only led to built up desire that raged inside of Hans. And Elsa was also his fiancée now. Something about that profession of love and commitment made it more difficult for Hans to swallow his desires, queen's orders or not.

Unaware of Hans' growing sexual frustration, Elsa's tongue peeked out and licked a dollop of raspberry from corner of her mouth when she found fervent eyes darker than bloodstones staring back at her with explicit want. She had to dart her own eyes away just to maintain her focus.

"I think the raspberry is refreshing," she carried on, ignoring the hand sliding over the curve of her hip. "The zest will give everyone a final taste of summer." Knowing they were playing with fire, Elsa threw Hans a warning glance and he dared not move his hand after that.

"Why don't we do both?" He suggested, playing along with the subtext of their conversation. "Two layers of chocolate mouse with a layer of raspberry in the middle. I think it's a winning combination," eyes devilishly motioning between them," don't you think?"

It wasn't a bad idea but Elsa was already so delightfully distracted by that hand clutched at her hip and noticed a flash of purple shimmering over her dress.

She adjusted herself closer to him. Because she'd worked hard the past few weeks and owed it to herself to indulge her fiancé, if just a little. "That's actually a brilliant idea."

"You'd expect nothing less from me, I hope," taking the chance to press a kiss to her velvety lips.

There was heat in the exchange. A bubbling urge Elsa could feel pooling low in her gut.

"Hans," she warned with a meager push against his chest, but it was futile. He already had her at his mercy with his hand stroking up and down the curve of her back.

"Just a kiss. Nothing more," he promised.

It was never _just_ a kiss with Hans. He captured her lips and kissed them slowly, gently before tilting his head and stealing the breath from the very depths of her lungs, leaving her gasping when they finally broke. Only when they did, Hans could see the sudden change in her gown.

"Purple," he mused and looked to Elsa for an explanation. "Have I upset you?"

"No," she breathed heavily, still recovering from his assailment.

"Then what?"

She turned away from him momentarily, blushing until she was as red as the vibrant raspberry filling on the table.

"I'm… I'm…." She stuttered and nervously tugged at her skirt as she bit back the truth.

"Whatever it is, you can tell me," Hans assured gently, fearing the worst.

"I'm aroused." As if that answer didn't all but electrify Hans to the point of jubilation, Elsa was a little embarrassed and clamped down on her lower lip while she waited for his reaction. Unknowingly teasing Hans with the action so much that he most certainly didn't trust himself any longer.

"So am I," he happily confessed with growl and reclaimed her mouth. Elsa knew how easily it would be for her to relent if Hans kept at it like this. He kissed her so passionate that he could almost pull the very words he longed to hear right of her.

A touch of tongues and the silky taste of lingering chocolate was ridiculously intoxicating. The way he touched her possessed such a finality that although Elsa commanded herself to resist, the only thing out of her mouth was a helpless moan before she tried again.

"We can't-"

"Elsa, this is insane," pulling back to reason with those celestial-blue eyes. "We can't go on like this and I'm putting a stop to it." Before Elsa could reply, Hans had her out of her seat and then quickly located the nearest exist. "Come with me."

It felt terribly wrong to leave behind a plate of uneaten chocolate cake, but Elsa was sure she was going to regret what was about to happen even more.

Hans got her all the way to her bedchambers and shut the door behind them when Elsa started to protest again. Meekly, but she wasn't going to completely give into him, or herself, so easily.

He had her pressed against the door, deftly holding her jaw and staring at her most intently as she rested against what had once been her barrier to the world. Now helping to pin her to the man of endless possibilities as ribbons of rushing warmth cascaded down her body.

Elsa's apprehension was twisted across her features, even as Han began to softly stroke her cheek with an easy smile. "I'm not going to sleep with you," he quietly assured and silenced her qualms. "Just kiss me."

"But-"

" _Just_ kiss me." The command was spoken so sweetly, merely a whisper away from her lips, that Elsa practically melted into the kiss and relented to his charm. His tongue gently brushed against hers again and she knew they'd opened Pandora's box.

"You have no willpower," Elsa chided playfully before hastily returning her lips to his.

"When have I ever had willpower around you?"

A teasing moment behind a locked door was a lovely way to spend the afternoon but Elsa had a sneaking suspicion Hans had more in mind. With his hands ghosting down her sides and claiming their rightful place on her hips, it was as if he was daring her to make the next move.

"If we're not sleeping together, what exactly is your plan?"

His lips parted from hers and pulled into a mirthful grin, and she could tell he definitely had a plan. "I could give you a kiss."

She nearly laughed at his insipid suggestion. "Are you confused as to what we've been doing so far?" Her classic sass dancing over her face.

"Not on your mouth," Hans chuckled and brazenly skimmed his hand down the center of her beveled bodice until it rested comfortably between her legs. "Here," stroking the delicate fold that made the queen gasp.

"Oh!" She swallowed. Suddenly Elsa wasn't as sassy as she had been a minute ago. His mouth on her... _there_ , was definitely something they'd never done. She may have been a steadfast queen in public but alone, with Hans, nerves tended to get the best of her.

Despite his inexperience, Hans found he loved taking Elsa further down their path of sexual exploration. He'd waited so long for her and wasn't about to rest until he showed her all the ways he could express just how much he truly loved her.

Hans' removed his jacket and boots and settled back onto his heels atop the perfectly made bed. A curl of his finger beckoned Elsa to join him and with a steadying breath, she obliged.

Timid, but extremely interested to experience this new way of love, Elsa crept onto the bed and let Hans carefully lay her back on the small collection of silk pillows before she raised a hand to dissolve her dress.

"No, no!" Hans blurted and grabbed her hand. "Leave it on. I'm curious to see what happens. Maybe it'll turn rainbow, who knows?"

Elsa laughed and relished the way Hans could always make her feel more comfortable during what could easily have been an awkward situation, seeing how this was another first. Hans was secretly hoping he appeared more confident than he really was. He might have had a wealth of information but the real thing had him putting a fair amount of pressure on himself.

The frosty hem of Elsa's teal dress slid over the knobby tops of her knees as Hans bunched it up around her waist. The cape had been moved off to the side and elaborately hung over the bed so that it glittered in the afternoon light. Their sex was elegantly fashionable if anything.

He removed her undergarments and tossed them aside before licking his lips as if a primal instinct had taken over. Someone once told Hans that women were an acquired taste but that wasn't true with Elsa. He craved her before ever having laid a hand on her. When he finally did place his hands around her legs to open her up to him, Hans knew he was about to sample divinity of the purest sort.

Alone at the far end of the bed, Elsa's eyes skipped about the canopy, unsure of where to look or what to do with her hands. It was easier to not think about such details when he'd been close enough to hold like the last time. Now Hans felt a million miles away and she was left alone with her own thoughts swirling around her head.

Everything was quiet for a while, only shallow breaths from the top of the bed in a cadence with the beating of Hans' heart, until an adorable squeak flew from Elsa lips when Hans' tongue first grazed her slit. Even though they weren't engaged in typical copulation, what they were doing was still frowned upon for unmarried couples. So they both had to be extremely quiet since it was also the middle of the day.

Hans glided over her peachy soft skin like a painter working a masterpiece, diligent strokes and brilliant use of style and technique. He found that hidden treasure at the apex, a precious pearl emerging to be suckled and adored by his tongue as Elsa's lips parted to allow for heavier breathing. Sharp gasps rushed in and out of her lungs, eyes heavily slipping shut to welcome unyielding bliss.

He found her to be gorgeously wet and more aroused and responsive than previous times. Temptation got the best of him and he pushed a single finger inside of her, provoking a moan Elsa failed to suppress and she clapped a hand over her mouth. He didn't thrust or even penetrate her much. Instead he found a spot that he'd heard would drive a woman crazy, swollen and waiting for him just inside. His finger stroked in the slightest against her front wall, using that erogenous sweet spot to get her to breathe in short erotic bursts. He worked furiously for each and every broken cry and found that he was quite the natural at driving her wild with just a flick of his tongue and a twist of his finger.

The sheer amount of enjoyment Hans experienced was immeasurable. He hadn't just been lusting after Elsa all afternoon. Or for the past week. If he had only been after physical pleasure he would have thought of something else besides laving his beloved between her quivering thighs.

He lived to pour his love out onto her because while everyone else couldn't see Elsa beyond her role; sister, sovereign, Snow Queen. Hans knew a different woman. One who reserved her heart only for those most sacred to her. Who despite all Anna had been through, was deprived of the loving embrace of her family for over thirteen years. Who crushed her own spirit and swallowed her aching need to be nurtured to protect her loved ones. Always putting others first and only left with years of fear and torment. This selfless, beautiful, wonderful woman who Hans couldn't believe he was finally going to marry, needed to be loved as thoroughly and as completely as he could manage. It wasn't just about physical chemistry, which they had in spades, or carnal desire. For Hans, it was about providing the love Elsa had always deserved.

A look of extreme concentration pulled at Elsa's features, her cheeks heated and flamed, roasting from the rush of sumptuous lips and wet pleasure worshiping her core. A feeling so overwhelming that at times she ceased to breathe at all.

"Breathe, love," Hans reminded gently before returning his tongue to liberally worry that tender little nub into oblivion.

"Ahhhhh, yes! Yessssss!" Elsa hissed as quietly as she could, undulating her body into his perfectly wet mouth. "There! There!" She cried when Hans found a spot that made everything fall away and give her wings. He wound her tighter and tighter, until she arched her back so fully that Hans could only see her hollowed stomach and heaving chest, feeling the sting of cool fingers twist in his hair. Her release came with a sudden jerk, launching herself further into his mouth, and exhaled a breath so forceful it sounded as if she had emerged from the watery depths of the fjord for a precious taste of air.

The erratic rolling of her hips guided Hans, letting her sink into the pleasure vibrating throughout every limb in her body. Weightless and spent, Elsa's spine retracted against the mattress as she tried to register the sensation of Hans' lips kissing up her torso.

She was far too tired to kiss him back once he reached her lips but curled into his side when laid down next her and combed back a few stray hairs that had fallen out of place.

"Do you have somewhere to be?" Dropping a kiss to her temple and a chosen few freckles.

"Mhmm," she groaned limply, eyelids as heavy as sandbags refusing to open. "But I've already decided I'm going to be late."

The sound of birds taking refuge in a nearby willow tree could be heard. Their sweet song serenading the pair as Hans held Elsa in his arms.

"You glowed," Hans said, playing with the icy embellishments on Elsa's sleeve.

She hadn't yet fully recovered from Hans' _kiss,_ not even bothering to lift her head to respond.

"Hmm?"

"Your dress," he clarified. "It glowed. I thought it would turn a different color but it went pure white and illuminated like a diamond. It was beautiful."

"You should have seen how I felt on the inside," Elsa replied wryly and puffed a laugh against a pillow. "That was... there are no words. Perfect."

Hans smiled and pulled Elsa in tighter so they were spooned together, his arms cradled around her waist and his chin nuzzled into the crook of her neck where he lightly kissed behind her ear. Elsa's body limply melded to Hans', unable to reciprocate the cuddle because her legs were still useless and jelly-like. In fact her entire body felt like one of those gelatinous molds the chef always loved to put out on special occasions. She blamed him for all of this. Who knew chocolate could be so arousing?

"How did you know how to do that?"

The breath from Hans' laughed trickled Elsa's ear and she could feel him smiling wider.

"In truth, I'd heard about it from my brothers. _Overheard_ is probably more accurate." She laughed at his honesty. I closed my eyes one night and started thinking about you, about us. I was younger then but I knew I wanted to please you in every way possible."

" _Kissing_ included?" she quipped with a lazy smirk.

"Everything. There's so much more we can do. And we wouldn't have to worry about a pregnancy. If you let me show you."

Elsa turned in his arms, eyes as blue and as clear as the mountain glaciers gazing at him with wondrous intrigue.

"Then show me."

The queen was late to her afternoon appointment, but no one dared to utter a single word to her about it. Not when they could see the dazzling aurora of color on her gown when she finally arrived at her council chambers. The radiance of her skin. The twinkle in her eye. She couldn't even hide the smile that kept twitching at the corner of her lips. Their queen was happy and it was well deserved. And at the end of the day, a chocolate cake with chocolate mousse _and_ raspberry filling was added to the official wedding menu. Less than five weeks remained until the highly anticipated event of the year.


End file.
